Chris and I got into an argument the other day while playing Wii Sports because I was only flicking my wrists. Furthermore, I refused to stand up during play because I'm trying to "keep it real." You know, all these years sitting down only exerting thumbs. How dumb does standing up and moving around once in a while look? That's why I don't play real sports, 'cause the human body just looks so stupid in full movement, let alone simulated ones with a console. On the contrary, how hip does it look sitting down all the time? We practically scream "I'm cool" sunk deep in a sofa, intently focused on the television. It's couch potato all the time for me.

So when Chris recommended the above pun of a t-shirt, I was like "whatever." I quickly returned to my Oscar-esque game dialog during a particular cut-scene. Real men Wii standing up? Yeah right. Real men Wii sitting down. So even though some games encourage more movement than you're used to, refute them. If you don't, they will slowly take over your sacred gameplay traditions.

This article was originally published on Joystiq.

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