Sayonara Tokyo: The TGS aftermath
As our fearless leader Christopher Grant flies out of Narita Airport and returns to his vile trans-dimensional lair, the last remaining blemishes of Joystiq are being scrubbed from the silky sheet of Japan. A sigh of relief now washes over Tokyo, a city content to be rid of the obnoxious bloggers who devoured cheeseburgers on its trains, hurled paper into the "plastics" recycling bin and remained insultingly ignorant of the current Haruhi Suzimiya craze.
Though this year's Tokyo Game Show wasn't quite filled with earth-shaking revelations, it did allow us to gain further insight into anticipated titles such as Metal Gear Solid 4, echochrome, Ninja Gaiden 2, Nights: Journey of Dreams and, err... Chocobo's Mysterious Dungeon. But that's not all! This weekend will see our last batch of impressions materialize, along with a sordid account of Joystiq's run-in with the official Square Enix store. Following that, we'll share some interviews involving Gran Turismo 5, Ninja Gaiden: Dragon Sword, Loco Roco and Assassin's Creed.
As they say in Japan, "Please look forward to it!"
Official Tokyo Game Show stats:
Number of worthless pamphlets accepted because we didn't want to be rude: 43
Number of podcasts recorded: 2
Time taken to reach show floor from hotel: 90 minutes
Time taken to reach show floor from hotel when Chris wasn't around: 3 hours
Number of times the word "Ninjician" was used in a sentence: 29
Tasty / terrible drink ratio from random vending machine purchases: 70 / 30
Times Sega PR explained that Nights 2 wasn't a sequel, but merely a new game set in the same universe with the same characters: 1
Number of show attendees on public days: 87 gazillion apparently
Time taken to reach front of Metal Gear Solid 4 line: Worth it
Number of innocent bystanders killed in Sega's Ghost Squad: 4
Number of innocent bystanders intentionally killed in Sega's Ghost Squad: 3
Total percentage of text understood in Konami's Time Hollow: 0%
Number of times Japanese people apologized for our mistakes: Incalculable
Number of obnoxious booth workers communicating via megaphone: 31
Total number of Cloud cosplayers roaming the floor: Tended to infinity
While Andrew and Ludwig pretentiously stand in line at Sega's Joypolis arcade, Chris cringes as his hand unexpectedly phases out of existence.
Bomberman is adorable! The man inside wishes he was dead, though.
A beautiful view of Shinjuku taken from our private helicopter.
Jem and Ludwig discover the joys of Guitar Freaks. Or the lack of them, rather.
Andrew tries desperately to walk a stubborn electronic dog.
Cooking Mama -- the arcade game?
This isn't really related to anything, is it?
Only later did we find our photographer dead, pecked to a bloody pulp.
Yes, there's a Lavender one.
