Nokia has a laugh with cylindrical cellphone patent application

You kvetch enough about that ultrathin candybar taking up too much room in those über-tight Emo-style jeans -- we know you'd throw a fit if you had to tote around a mobile akin to a rolling pin. Nevertheless, that's not stopping Nokia's wildly imaginative R&D team from throwing out a patent app for a cylindrical cellphone. Granted, we are digging the movable materials and the potential for a fairly wide display, but unless we get some sort of spray can holster from The Home Depot, how else are we supposed to carry this thing without embarrassing ourselves?

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 8:29AM]

Pictures or it didn't happen...

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 10:28AM]

is that your phone in your pocket, or are you just excited to see me?

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:04AM]

Is that a cell phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:15AM]

Damnit. I was cruising the comments, hoping no one thought of it. Plus 1 for you!

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 8:35AM]

Tubular.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 8:38AM]

Well.... it this a phone? Or a dildo??? O_o

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 8:40AM]

hah yeah I was going to say if you couldn't fit it in your pants, you could always just store it prison-style

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 8:42AM]

Nokia Rabbit...

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 8:54AM]

Well, since it also has a vibrate function, it would be more specifically called a vibrator.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:16AM]

settings->vibrate->ON

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 10:56AM]

someone had to bring up the iphone...

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 10:56AM]

omgosh i'm dumb...i'm so used to someone bringing it up that when someone types phone, i now see iphone. i'm sorry...i have disgraced this blog.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 10:58AM]

omg i'm dumb. i'm so accustomed to someone bringing it up that when someone types phone, i see iphone. i'm sorry i have disgraced this blog.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 10:58AM]

asdfkljasd;lkfjaskldj damn comments system...please just low rank me already

[Mr Death Posted Jun 13th 2008 11:15AM]

lol, yeah I think the sex industry will be taking this concept very seriously indeed...

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 8:48AM]

I think of a tube of lipstick, which is good pocket-size. the keypad ould be worthless in that case, have to go all voice-activated.

Or we all start wearing those stormtrooper utility belts...

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:02AM]

I bet at least 25% of the people reading this site already have stormtrooper utility belts...

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 10:13AM]

Of course - the suit doesn't have any pockets.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:07AM]

That has got to be uncomfortable against the ear.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 11:18AM]

The top part should be the receiver, so you just shove it inside your ear.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:15AM]

Between this and the Morph, there is now no doubt in my mind the R&D department are definately smoking something strong.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:27AM]

Time for Nokia to cut 20% of their R&D team. :)

[aalaap Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:31AM]

Just put a pepper sprayer on the top or the bottom and it's a hit with the ladies.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:36AM]

What did Nokia R&D team pull this out of their a.... oh wait, they probably did after they shoved it in.. and thought "hey this would be a neat idea"

Moto just slashed R&D, the letter N is next...


look out LG, you are just 1 letter behind...

L-M-N
LG MOTO NOKIA

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 10:16AM]

wdf

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 10:49AM]

Well they have to use those record profits from Q1 2008 to something =D

[rock99rock Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:37AM]

Shut. Up.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:38AM]

I read the emo-jeans line and realized that's EXACTLY what they designed this for - this concept represents a giant leap in the field of usable crotch-stuffing.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 11:19AM]

Since when do emo kids ever get off of their phone enough to put it in their pockets?

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 12:12PM]

Sorry, what did you say?

I was busy talking on my phone, setting up tonight's Friday night mall night.

[timmy2000 Posted Jun 13th 2008 9:42AM]

At first I was thinking that this could be a Batman Cellphone Guantlet for his wrists, ol' chum.

[OriginalJosh Posted Jun 13th 2008 10:12AM]

haha, i get it, because it will look like you have a boner...funny stuff

[jashsayani Posted Jun 13th 2008 10:25AM]

Time for Nokia T series...
T = Thermos

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 11:42AM]

They've practically done this before with their lipstick-case phone that had a spinny wheel.

I have one, and used it for a while, and while they might be nice because they're compact (and also they look like a giant erection), they're not really useful for much more than one purpose (also like a giant erection). If you want to text on those suckers, good luck. It was also inspirational for getting a blackberry, at least.

http://images.google.com/images?q=nokia%207280&ie=UTF-8&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&sa=N&tab=wi

[MikeWard1701 Posted Jun 13th 2008 12:24PM]

"The new Nokia cyl, exclusive to Ann Summers" :P

[gregwlsn Posted Jun 13th 2008 1:47PM]

I think Magnum already has a lubricated case for these.

[gregwlsn Posted Jun 13th 2008 1:48PM]

Excuse me while I whip this out

*begins dialing*

[gregwlsn Posted Jun 13th 2008 1:49PM]

Are the black ones smaller, for once?



I can do this all day.

[(Unverified) Posted Jun 13th 2008 3:26PM]

I died laughing.

[(Unverified) Posted Jul 2nd 2008 4:00AM]

Wait is this Serious? no really?