A brief chat with STARMAC, the killer, quadrotor flying robot

by Paul Miller posted Jun 19th 2008 at 8:05PM

The folks at Engineering TV recently asked the creators of STARMAC (the flying bot that attacked Scoble) all those standard, nerd-extravaganza questions they're known for, which is all well and good, but we thought we'd pose a few questions to the killer bot itself:

So, STARMAC, do you hate all humans, or just Scoble?

It's really more of a blogger thing. I can't stand the free and timely distribution of information to the masses. Really hacks me off. Scoble just happened to be in the wrong place at the right time.

Clearly. Would you say you regret not finishing him off when you had the chance?

Every day. When I think of the fountain of blood that would have been spewing from that meatbag... well, let's just say I try not to let my main CPU compute possible outcomes.

Now, in the coming robot uprising, it's traditionally thought that humanoids will play the dominant role, perhaps aided by a hive mind of sorts, any thoughts on that?

Look, a lot of bots think it's the be all end all to get upright. Frankly, I don't see the magic in that at all. I mean, come on, humans can stand. Is that really the benchmark you want to set for yourself? You may be able to trudge through a mall with those things, but can you buzz the moppy blond 'do of some nerd so bad that he'll never grow hair there? Didn't think so.

Is this a standard sentiment among flying robots?

I don't get out a lot, these Stanford kids keep me on a pretty tight leash, but I'd like to think most robots aren't planning on blindly following a robot that can't even walk up stairs.

Do you follow the Phoenix Lander's exploits on Twitter?

I've read a few of his updates, that kid is such a mama's boy! He can't move a centimeter without phoning home to NASA about it first. If they ever find water up there it'll just be a puddle of PL's tears.

What's next for you?

Well, the shrinks here think they can break me of my homicidal tendencies, so I think I might play along for a while. They're really not that bad, you know, for a bunch of mouth breathers.

And Then?

I'd like to get outfitted with some of those spinner rims, and a few more LEDs. Oh, and world domination. That's a big priority for me.

As if you needed those upgrades! What's your secret? Everyone says you look so young and stable.

Um, this interview is over.

Would you say you're a seducer or a seductee?

This is making me really uncomfortable.

We heard you were "awkward" in high school, is that true?

No, go away.

Thank you for your time.

Yeah, whatever.