UK ATMs use cockney slang, we don't Adam 'n Eve it
By Vlad Savov 
posted August 25th 2009 6:13AM
posted August 25th 2009 6:13AM
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posted August 25th 2009 6:13AM
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I don't think anyone in London has spoken like that for the best part of 30 years.
Yeah, but a couple of hundred thousand mockneys will be queuing up to use it!
Tell that to Mr Madonna! All us cheeky cockney geezers are at it apparently.
I live in the west end, so would need a translator to understand one of those sausage'n'mash machines...
More to the point, Cockney rhyming slang was a code - only the first word of each two-word thing was said, e.g. "Barney", not "Barney Rubble", and "Sausage", not "Sausage & Mash".
Idiots.
that should read "Bangers and Mash"
I thing the world has gone all 6's and 7's
There is an accent that localizes to the East end of London but it's sure not cockney these days.
Why is it that in movies whenever someone needs an English accent they sound like they're from the West end of London?
Awesome! Sausage and Mash from a hole in the wall!
Beats Maccy D's on a night oot.
as do most things
Which James Blunt came up with this one?
I agree with this comment.
ha ha - brilliant!
Berkshire Hunt actually.
Actually, I think you mean "Berkeley Hunt" - often shortened to "Berk".
No.. I mean Berkshire Hunt.
Royal Berkshire Hunt.
Berkeley does not have a hunt.
Berkeley is in California
There is no fox hunting in California
We do not have fox hunting in California.
We have never had fox hunting in California.
'gimme ya money or I'll cut ya innit or summat'
'wot you lookin at....don dis me innit'
much more appropriate for 21st century london taaaaaaaaan
+1, though this mainly applies to south of the river...or 'Saaaaarf Landan, innit' as the locals would say ;)
innit bruv. BRRRRRRRRRRAP
BOOYASHAKA
"BOOYASHAKA" - really?
Its not the 90s anymore.
"really?"
its not the....ooooo cant be arsed
Or 'Listen rude boy don't mek me af to wet you up, Me want ya money now !'
@poke Why would you say its not the 90's anymore when Da Ali G show first came on in 2000 on Channel 4?
RESPECT!
u wot m8? use get merked
You havin' a bubble??
Do you mean Turkish??
Bubble means Greek
Yeah, depends who teaches you cockney :p..
Having a bubble
Bubble-Bath
Laugh
Having a laugh
hmmmm....
Bubble (bath) - Laugh
Turkish (bath) - Laugh
Bubble (and squeak) - Greek
Turkish (Delight) - Shite
I see why it died out.
As long as you don't get your monkeys and ponies mixed up.
From the Times article:
“Real Cockneys don’t have bank accounts or all that palava,” he said. “They put it under the mattress.”
Agreed!
Haha, Half my family still speak like this.
The person who wrote this article is a bit of an idiot for not understanding it properly. It was never a criminal thing, just made to be a "criminals language" by Hollywood. Annoying.
Correction, real cockney's dont have bank accounts or all that palava. their money is under your mattress.
My grandfather was born within earshot of bow bells (making him a real cockney), he didn't talk like that (he was sent to a Jewish school where they taught him to speak properly)
It;s all gone a bit Mary Poppins.
No its all gone pete tong
After I viddied the ATM, I figured I'd pick up me droogs and go out for some ultra-violence and the ol' in-out.
This post deserves recognition. Maybe no one got the reference. Nonetheless, excellent post, CoffeeGrinder.
I got the reference, but man, that was a giant shoe-horn.
I think you're confusing The East End with Thamesmead.
I feel like hearin' the 9th once agan... ô_o
CWO FTW!
And the first thing that flashed into my gulliver was that I'd like to have her right down there on the floor with the old in-out, real savage.
You know what you can do wit that watch?!?
Love the reference.
Guy Ritchie has a lot to answer for. If he makes a bollocks of "Sherlock Holmes" then I'm not going to be impressed.
On a side note, that article as states the following:
"Bank Machine, which runs 2,500 ATMs across the country, was aiming to amuse, but it has grander ambitions too. It hopes to follow the Cockney cash machines with Brummie, Geordie, Scouse and Scots ATMs. It hopes that ATMs will serve to keep these dialects alive in Britain."
Keep them alive? Why would you want to keep them alive? Scouse is the dialect equivalent of someone drawing their fingernails down a blackboard and the rest, while they can sound nice, just serve as a means of preventing non-locals from understanding what is being said (i.e. might as well be a separate language like Cornish). Since I hate acronyms and abbreviations with a fiery passion I more or less feel the same way about regional dialects when they prevent communication.
I love regional accents, I think they are a unique part of Britain.
So everyone has to talk in BBC English from now on?
Who are you? Oswald Moseley?
What a scouse keyboard looks like: http://www.bernhardt.org.uk/jokes/keyb-scouser.jpg
@Oli D
I have absolutely nothing against a "regional twang" and, as I said, some regional accents can sound very nice (my wife, for example, comes from the Durham area). However, there is a difference between a regional accent and a regional dialect and there is no place for the later in the modern world. Anything that prevents communication is "a bad thing". BBC English has a lot to be said for it since it can be understood by everyone.
My exception to the above is Scouse which is both an accent and dialect that is just horrible.