Two Bosses Enter ... but only One Boss Leaves, in WoW.com's series of fantasy death matches. It's a brand new season and a brand new format, introducing judges from WoW.com and the WoW community at large -- and of course, your votes. Grab a seat, and let's get ready to rumble!
The Thunderdome's no Bartertown, Krick and Ick are no Master Blaster ... and as many expected, Scourgelord Tyrannus dominated this week's Two Bosses fantasy deathmatch. More than three-quarters of the spectators anointed the Scourgelord with the victor's crown. The judges tied it up for Tyrannus as well, leaving the path clear for what's shaping up to be an intriguing match, Falric vs. Argent Confessor Paletress. (By the way, if you're a fan of the cage match genre, check out last week's match on Suvudu: Jaime Lannister vs. Hermione Granger -- yeah, it's so one-sided it's just mean, but sometimes those are the train wrecks we love to watch go down. George R.R. Martin himself weighs in, too; get back to writing, bud. )
Join us after the break for the judges' decisions, plus your chance to vote in Falric vs. Paletress. For in the words of Dr. Dealgood: "Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls ... Dyin' time's here."
Krick and Ick get mastered and blastered
Krick and Ick's lopsided stand against Tyrannus netted the scourgelord more than three-quarters of the spectator vote.
In the stands
- Scourgelord Tyrannus 77.4%
- Krick and Ick: 17.8%
- Tie: 4.9%
First off, in the instance, Scourgelord Tyrannus just kills Krick from a distance.
If that's not enough for you, consider this: Pursuit isn't going to matter here. Poison Nova does a lot of damage, but it's trivial for Tyrannus to punt Ick out of his melee box instead of running away from the plague eruptor. Same for the bombs: with his massive knockback attack (Forceful Smash), if we're assuming it works here (and the rules specify that it does), Tyrannus doesn't have to move for those, either. He can just hammer Ick away from himself once Krick starts casting. That leaves Rimefang's Hoarfrost and Icy Blast to slow Ick, making it hard for him to get back to cast any abilities, as well as Tyrannus' Overlord's Brand, which is going to basically hurt either Krick or Ick a lot (because whatever damage Tyrannus takes, one of them is going to take). (In game, only Ick is actually targetable, to my knowledge, but we'll assume here that it could pick either of them.)
Combine all that with Tyrannus' Unholy Power, and it's game over. Ick is eating Hoarfrosts, getting stunned, getting slowed, getting his own damage turned back on him, and getting punted out of melee range whenever Krick tries to do something fancy. Tyrannus might as well put a hand on Krick's head or slap him with his own hands while saying "Stop hitting yourself!" -- it's that one-sided a beatdown.
Judge Zapperz: Scourgelord Tyrannus
I actually have a soft spot for Krick, because his indecisiveness reminds me of every boss I've ever had and his voice reminds me of my favorite movie. Still, they don't have a chance here. Krick and Ick's method of attack is pretty simple: litter the field with poison and toxic waste. Part of the problem with this approach is Rimefang is airborne all the time and won't take much damage from this. Tyrannus is a buff DK; he'd take some damage but would generally have the attitude of John Candy in "Armed and Dangerous" that "A little toxic waste isn't going to kill you." He'd wade through it, powering up with Unholy Power, then whack Ick with a couple forceful smashes just for kicks.
Krick and Ick would do their best to hold Tyrannus off: a Shadow Bolt here, an Explosive Barrage there and there, but it's not enough. Tyrannus marks Ick with Overlord's Brand. Krick's options are limited; he can either have Ick pound away at Tyrannus and therefore himself, or sit back and do nothing while Tyrannus pounds away at him. Being the true administrator he is, Krick would change his mind a few times: "Attack him! No, stop, stop! No attack the Wyrm! No, wait ..." Meanwhile, Tyrannus drops a Mark of Rimefang on Ick. Ick then Krick become Rimefang's snacks. I hear gnomes are low in calories, especially the undead ones ...
Judge Michael Gray: Scourgelord Tyrannus
The problem with Tyrannus against Krick and Ick is that they're both double acts. Don't get me wrong -- I absolutely want to say that Master Blaster rules Bartertown. But I can't, because it's not like Tyrannus is stepping up against the gnome and his minion all by himself. He's got this pesky dragon.
Even more importantly, just like the Devourer in our last showdown, Tyrannus has the ability to reroute damage from himself to another target. In that infinitely potent, judo-like "use your opponent's strength against them," Tyrannus will turn the dynamic duo's own incredibly power against them.
Finally, Tyrannus is the kind of name that calls back to the pop culture Sith. Lord Tyrannus has such a Sith-like name that Krick and Ick stand no chance.
Judge Sky Paladin: Scourgelord Tyrannus
Scourgelord Tyrannus reviewed the paperwork an undead servitor had handed him. It seemed Krick had, once again, been misusing the slaves for his own agenda, and production had fallen behind.
"Strikes?" Tyrannus asked.
Another servitor placed Tyrannus' list of worker errors in his hand. Tyrannus narrowed his eyes and picked out Krick's name, written in elegant linked script. Two crosses were marked next to the inscription. Tyrannus tapped them, smiling slightly.
"Weak, useless gnome. You are all out of chances, now."
(Read the rest of Judge Sky Paladin's scenario for this battle in the comments of the battle.)
The Laws of the Thunderdome
- The Two Bosses Thunderdome is considered neutral territory, where both combatants are able to access their usual encounter mechanics and abilities. If you can't visualize it inside the Thunderdome, visualize it someplace else -- but you must take into consideration all of each bosses' abilities and mechanics.
- Assume that each opponent is intelligent and capable of strategic thinking.
- All of the competitors' abilities, including crowd control and other effects to which bosses are usually immune, work on their opponents (with apologies to considerations of lore on this point).
- Assume that the opponents share similar levels, health pools and comparative overall damage output.
- Don't get caught up in gameplay mechanics and what actual players might do in each encounter.
- Don't neglect style, story and scale. Everything is a factor; seeking balance is your goal as a spectator and judge.
In Corner One: Falric
I should have been a farmer like my father wanted.
Lousy pay ... Constant danger ...
Well, at least I get to hobnob with royalty.
The first boss within the Halls of Reflection, Falric guards the path to the Lich King's throne room. Formerly a Lordaeron captain serving as one of Prince Arthas Menethil's most trusted men during the campaigns against the Scourge, he and Marwyn became powerful Scourge commanders after their prince turned to more evil ways.
Falric begins by unleashing four increasingly large waves of monsters. Inside the Two Bosses Thunderdome, we will consider Falric's four waves of monsters to be roughly equivalent in strength and tenacity to his opponent's three waves of three fighters.
- Ghostly Priest
- Phantom Mage
- Phantom Hallucination
- Shadowy Mercenary
- Spectral Footman
- Tortured Rifleman
Read more about Falric's battle tactics, and study reports from adventurers who've faced him in battle.
In Corner Two: Argent Confessor Paletress
Thank you, good herald. Your words are too kind. May the Light give me strength to provide a worthy challenge.
Argent Confessor Paletress is a human priest combatant in the Trial of the Champion. She can be heard periodically speaking to the various faction champions and receiving their confessions behind the confession screen.
- Confess/Reflective Shield
- Holy Fire
- Holy Nova
- Holy Smite
- Summon Memory Summons one of the memories of Algalon the Observer, Archimonde, Chromaggus, Cyanigosa, Priestess Delrissa, Eck the Ferocious, Entropius, Gruul the Dragonkiller, Hakkar the Soulflayer, Heigan the Unclean, Herod, Hogger, Ignis the Furnace Master, Illidan Stormrage, Ingvar the Plunderer, Warlord Kalithresh, Lucifron, Prince Malchezaar, Mutanus the Devourer, Onyxia, Prince Thunderaan, Edwin VanCleef, Lady Vashj, Vek'nilash, General Vezax, which all use the same abilities: Waking Nightmare, Shadows of the Past or Old Wounds (inflicts 1,875 physical damage to an enemy every 1 sec. for 12 sec.)
Before facing Paletress, opponents must deal with three groups of three fighters. Inside the Two Bosses Thunderdome, we will consider Paletress' three waves of three fighters to be roughly equivalent in strength and tenacity to her opponent's four waves of monsters.
Read more about battling Argent Confessor Paletress, and review reports from gladiators who've faced her in the tournament.
Two bosses enter, one boss leaves
Two Bosses Enter matchups are about substance and style, not game play and mechanics. Don't base your strategies on player tactics, which opponent has been easiest or most difficult for you personally, or the difficulty of each opponent relative to instance progression. Vote for the spirit of the battle as set forth above. Set aside differences in opponents' health pools, game level and actual damage output. Absolutely no game-mechanic nitpicking!
|Falric wins (Paletress dies)||807 (38.3%)|
|Paletress wins (Falric dies)||1237 (58.7%)|
|Tie (something else happens)||63 (3.0%)|
The Five-Man Bosses of Icecrown Citadel and Trial of the Champion
Match 1: Bronjahm vs. The Black Knight – THE BLACK KNIGHT
Match 2: Devourer of Souls vs. Forgemaster Garfrost – DEVOURER OF SOULS
Match 3: Krick and Ick vs. Scourgelord Tyrannus -- SCOURGELORD TYRANNUS
Match 4: Falric vs. Argent Confessor Paletress
Match 5: Marwyn vs. ToC PvP champions
March 6: Eadric the Pure vs. Lich King
Set aside the world order -- let the Thunderdome determine who's the champion of Icecrown! Come back next week to find out who is the victor of the Icecrown-Trial of the Champions season of Two Bosses Enter, One Boss Leaves.