You begin life as a goblin searching out your own fame and fortune. You've recently been granted a promotion in the Bilgewater Cartel, and now work with an executive assistant named Sassy Hardwrench. There's even a pair of hardbodied "assistants" who're eager to help out named Candy Cane and Chip Endale. Considering how Candy and Chip are dressed, though, I suspect they're mostly lingering around as decoration.
With three characters inimately involved with your character from the word "go," your goblin will have dozens of valuable conflicts available for regular roleplay. What was your experience with Sassy really like? (Obviously, there's as in-game answer to that question, but you should take liberties to represent your unique character.) Were you a bigger fan of Candy or Chip? We can presume the average goblin at your middle-management level all have similar assistants, so it's not like you're building a Mary Sue empire by writing out your own tea of assistants.
- Mage and Warlock: The mage trainer (Fizz Lighter ) and the warlock trainer (Evol Fingers) are engaged in mortal combat in the goblin the starting area. Every few seconds, Evol hurls a shadowbolt at Fizz across the starting area. Not to be outdone, Fizz fires back with a nice, meaty fireball. The two seem locked in an internal struggle, nuking one another endlessly.
Both trainers are actually quite kind to class outsiders. Evol tells a non-warlock that there's nothing Evol can teach them, but does so very politely. Fizz echoes the sentiment, although he does add that "all this finger waggling" means he gives an astounding neck massage.
- Rogue: The rogue trainer is Slink Sharpshiv. She paces back and forth across the starting area, sometimes in that curious half-transparent invisibility of a rogue where you can see anyway. Sometimes, she stands out as plain as night and day. When you talk to her, she expresses shock that you can see her.
Clearly, while she may be a deadly combatant, this rogue isn't the sharpest knife in the stabbing kitchen drawer. I'm not sure if that would be a commentary on how your character would view rogues as much as how he'd view goblins.
- Priest: The priest trainer is Sister Goldskimmer, who is the epitome of all things goblin. While she is a priest, and offers passer-bys a buff for free, she points out that you don't have to be religious to offer a tithe. I think that should leave most characters with a warm feeling about the goblin LIght.
- Hunter trainer: The hunter trainer is Bamm Megabomb. He's a blond man standing in the corner, firing round after round into target dummies. (These target dummies are the trademarked goblin pink flamingos.)
Interestingly, Bamm doesn't have that much to say to non-hunters, so he probably doesn't leave much of an impression except that hunters really don't like flamingos.
- Shaman trainer: The shaman trainer is Maxx Avalanche, which is about as hep and cool a name as I could imagine. He stands a little to the side from Evol and Fizz, watching the two cloth casters hurl spells back and forth. However, just as a shaman probably would view such rivalry, he occasionally chides them for the behavior ... and shocks them with a lightning bolt.
Clearly, most characters will believe shaman are beyond petty rivalries. Or, alternatively, just likes shooting people with lightning.
- Warrior "trainer:" The warrior trainer is a target dummy shaped like a goblin. If your character takes any wisdom from this, it would be that warrior are to be poked at and shot. I think most warrior tanks would agree with that.
Fast cars and big explosions
From a very young level, goblins like shiny things and explosive things. That image above is the hot rod your newly minted goblin executive will be driving by level 2. It has exactly three buttons to help you control it. The first button is to Punch It so that you can go faster. The second is to Honk Horn to let fools know you're on the way. The last control allows you to use the Radio. It only has one volume setting: eleven. (That's right, that's what it actually says.)
At level two, you're already cruising around in the coolest vehicle ever seen in Azeroth. This should affect your character's mindset. Find yourself forced to ride a pony or a seahorse? This is a downgrade, baby. Time is money, and those slowpoke living creatures just don't have the raw speed of machinery. Hell, even the Hot Rod itself has to wear racing goggles.
Goblins show this flair for the dramatic from a very early age. Embrace it and share it.
Something beneath the surface
That is a distance view from the Pipe, part of the Kezan highway in the starting area. All those pipes and all that machinery simply lurks beneath the surface of Kezan. If you didn't get this glimpse of it from the Pipe, you might not ever know it existed. The starter quests of the Bilgewater Cartel are very much like that.
For all that the goblins might just look like cartoon characters or maybe more explosive versions of gnomes, it doesn't take long to realize that something much more complex is happening beneath that green surface. When roleplaying your goblin, enjoy the cheap joke, but make sure you have a deeper agenda.
This is just some starting thoughts from the goblin starting area. We'll keep getting deeper as the beta advances.
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