A dramatic reinterpretation:

Activision CEO Bobby Kotick: But we killed the Guitar Hero franchise.

Miracle Max: Ooh-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. Guitar Hero is only mostly dead, which means it's slightly alive. See, mostly dead I can work with. Even your own veep Dan Winters just said the franchise was only "on hiatus -- we're not ending it."

Kotick: But we disbanded the Guitar Hero business unit!

Miracle Max: Didn't you hear me? Slightly alive. Now, all dead? Well, if Guitar Hero was all dead there's usually only one thing that you can do ...

Kotick: What's that?

Miracle Max: Go through its catalog of unreleased DLC and gather up the loose change.

New Guitar Hero Music Library additions:
  • "Lifelong Dayshift" – Middle Class Rut ($1.99)
  • "New Low" – Middle Class Rut ($1.99)
  • "Sad To Know" – Middle Class Rut ($1.99)
  • "Middle Class Rut Track Pack" ($5.49)
  • "Savor The Kill" – Darkest Hour ($1.99)
  • "Beyond The Life You Know" – Darkest Hour ($1.99)
  • "Doomsayer" – Darkest Hour ($1.99)
  • "Darkest Hour Track Pack" ($5.49)
  • "Hey Superstar" – Madina Lake ($1.99)
  • "Ignorance" – Paramore ($1.99)
  • "Across 5 Oceans" – Madina Lake ($1.99)
  • "That's What You Get" – Paramore ($1.99)
  • "Emo Edge Track Pack" ($7.49)

[Image credit: MGM; source: Netflix Move Fans]

This article was originally published on Joystiq.