Let the hive mind of Engadget get that for you.
"I'm in the market for a new phone and money isn't a limitation. I'm also not partial to any particular US carrier, but here are some of the features I'd like to have: WiFi, GPS, good coverage in lots of places, push Gmail (a must!), physical keyboard (a must!), a touchscreen, decent battery life and a relatively slim body. And please, nothing that has a fruit logo on it. No offense to the fruit fans, though. Thanks!"
I didn't call you "middle America", where do you live?
What I am talking about is how surprised I am to turn on the news to see people sh!ting there pants about what they think of as communism. This has been taken so far that it has come full circle and is now mistaken as Nazzi:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYlZiWK2Iy8
Yeah I know.... you've seen it.
The thing is this: someone laughs at a guy who's bought 9 Rolls Royces and a tropical island. You brand him as a communist.
Over reaction my friend, you sound like a caricature of what the rest of the world see as American.
Let it go.