ScalpMassager
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OSIM uCrown 2 rubs your head, looks like an electric chair appendage
You know, there are some things in life you never expect to do twice: get divorced, fall into the same puddle, write a post about scalp massagers. But here we are, looking at the OSIM uCrown 2 -- an AA battery-powered "soothing head massager" that will jingle your worries away while using "patented air pressure technology, vibration, magnetic therapy" and heat to make your cranium a warm and cozy place to be. We give it credit for looking less like it came from the set of Spaceballs than your typical fare, but quickly take it back because of the ridiculous asking price of $200 and the fact neither model is brave enough to wear the uCrown with their eyes open.
Headtime scalp massager massages scalps, blows minds
Say what you will, but we love the idea of having a tireless automaton massaging our overworked noggins. And, since human slavery was outlawed a good while ago, our only choice left is modern technology. Enter the Headtime scalp massager, produced by Kinatech. This outsized helmet has an array of 29 silicone balls for acupressure and 34 ceramic ones for... well, we don't actually know. There's an internal speaker with the soothing sounds of nature, as well as a temperature controller, which suggests this bad boy could serve as a pretty awesome cranium heater as well. Do yourself a favor and check out the rather threatening looking inside of the helmet after the break.
