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Well Fed Buff: Dragonbreath Chili

Amanda Dean

Every Thursday, Well Fed Buff will be serving up the tastiest dishes to boost your HP and stats, just in time for your weekend gaming.

Hello hungry readers! Welcome to this week's installment of Well Fed Buff. When the weather gets cold nothing hits the spot like Dragonbreath Chili. This recipe can be acquired from vendors in Dustwallow Marsh or Desolace and requires 200 skill in Cooking to create. For ten minutes after eating, the consumer occasionally belches a cone of flame. The effects of the real version are much longer lasting, but just as deadly.

Patience is the key to the perfect pot of Dragonbreath Chili. Well Sriracha is actually the key, but patience comes in handy. Be prepared to wait at least three hours for this recipe to come to fruition, and keep in mind that it is even better the next day. These instructions makes enough chili to feed a horde of Horde (or Alliance). and are guaranteed to warm you from the outside in... and then some.

1 Lb Mystery Meat (I use crumbled veggie burgers, but you might want to use ground beef)
1 Small Flame Sac (1/4 c. Sriracha)
1 Packet Hot Spices (2 Tbs Chili Powder, ½ Tsp each Red Pepper, White Pepper, Garlic Powder, and Cumin)
5 Jalapenos
1 Onion
1 28-Oz Can Crushed Tomatoes
1 28-Oz Can Diced Tomatoes
5 15.5-Oz Cans Beans (I use Chili Beans, Dark Red Kidney Beans, Light Red Kidney Beams, Black Beans, and Pinto Beans)

1. Obtain the largest crock pot you can find and place on high setting.
2. Combine chopped onions and jalapenos* with Mystery Meat, Flame Sac, and Hot spices in crock pot.
3. Cook until meat is browned and veggies are tender. This will allow the flavors to mingle in the most deadly fashion.
4. Add tomatoes and beans. Keep chili on high setting until it comes to a deceptively happy simmer.
5. Reduce heat and enjoy!
6. Consume an over-the-counter antacid and have another bowl.

Serving Suggestions:

Remember that the focus of this recipe is spice. To reduce the perceived heat of this dish, garnish with sour cream, grated Fine Aged Cheddar, and chopped onions. Dragonbreath Chili is perfectly paired with a glass of Ice Cold Milk or a pint of Thunderbrew Ale depending on your audience.

* I cannot stress enough the importance of keeping your hands from your eyes in this step lest you need the services of a healer.

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