A 217,000-message record attempt nearly cost one dude $26 grand, which probably would've really bummed him out had he realized that the record attempt was going to be shattered -- seemingly -- just a few weeks later. A California teenager by the name of Crystal Wiski has apparently sent and received a mind-numbing 303,398 texts in a single month on an iPhone, and the most amazing thing about it is that she doesn't seem to have been gunning for a record on purpose. Her reason? "I am popular, I can't help it." It's not totally clear to us how 300,000-plus texts is biologically or technologically possible for a human / iPhone combination, especially without sending meaningless, one-letter texts to random contacts -- but then again, teenagers do strange, amazing things. Live the dream, Crystal.