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Rumor Roundup: A neutron star of newslessness

Chris Rawson
Updated ·3 min read
0

Apple Preparing iOS 7.1.2 Update, Likely Addressing Email Encryption and iMessage Issues (MacRumors)

As Apple rumors go, this one is relatively tame and mundane. That means it's far more likely to be true.

How the iPhone 6 and iPhone phablet compare to current flagships from Apple and Samsung (BGR)

From the article: "We see mockups that supposedly represent Apple's upcoming iPhone 6 compared to other smartphone models every day."

Mysteriously left out of the article: "And we post every single one of them, shamelessly, and then make it sound like they're legitimate 'leaks' because we are chasing pageviews above all else and have no respect for our readers' intelligence whatsoever. Speaking of which, here's another one of our execrable articles with an iPhone 6 mockup at its gooey, raw sewage center."

This latest mockup non-story is sourced from Business Insider, which makes this post basically a neutron star of newslessness. Only the addition of supporting "evidence" from an analyst or Digitimes could cause this article to collapse into a full-fledged black hole of purest nonsense.

Slab of metal that vaguely resembles 'iPhone 6' leaks spotted in Romania (AppleInsider)

This headline reads like something straight from The Onion. The article itself isn't much better. It's only a matter of time before we see a story like this (most likely from BGR):

IPHONE 6 LEAK: Design similar to Apple's next iPhone found burnt into piece of toast

Apple wants Beats for Jimmy Iovine and Dr. Dre, not technology (AppleInsider)

Serious question: is there any actual evidence that Apple wants Beats at all, for anything? Any evidence at all? Even a single, legitimate shred? If there is, I certainly haven't seen it.

HI-DEF IPHONE 6 LEAK: iPhone 6 compared to every older iPhone in new high-quality video (BGR)

From the article: "The latest installment in the ongoing series of iPhone 6 leaks is perhaps one of the most interesting yet."

But later on: "An iPhone 6 mockup has been compared to every other previous iPhone model in a high quality, high-definition video for the first time." (emphasis added)

Watching BGR's slow self-destruction of the last remaining dregs of its credibility is entertaining on one level, but on another level it's almost painful. The site used to be one of the go-to spots for news on mobile devices. Now it's little more than a poster child for what happens when you chase rumors (and the attendant pageviews) above all other considerations.

Compare what BGR was like as little as three years ago to the click-baiting brothel of nonsense it's become today, and let it serve as a cautionary tale: this is what you can become if you stop caring about the truth.

Latest Weibo leak shows supposed 4.7-inch iPhone screen backlight part (9to5 Mac)

From the article: "Weibo is continuing to be the source of unverified iPhone 6 leaks."

Mysteriously left out of the article: "And we post every single one of them..." and so forth.

Apple's Acquisition of Beats Could Be Delayed Because of Valuation, Roles, and More (MacRumors)

For all the reasons outlined in this article, there's one they left out: the fact that this rumored acquisition never made a bit of sense in the first place.

Speaking of things that make absolutely no sense...

Apple Testing ARM Based Mac Prototypes with Large Magic Trackpad? (MacRumors)

"The question mark in the headline lets us retain our powers of legitimacy!"

This rumor crops up every single year, so the only surprising thing about it is that we almost made it as far as June before hearing this BS yet again in 2014. All the reasons this rumor didn't make sense in 2010, 2011, 2012 or 2013 remain true this year. The short-short version: ARM processors still lag far behind Intel processors in terms of raw CPU power, often by as much as an order of magnitude.

My iPad Air is wicked fast for a lot of applications, but a 2013-era MacBook Pro it is not.