After a 15-minute "you can still trust us" intro, endless inspired-by-your-dreams cliches and enough specs to benumb the most caffeinated tech blogger, Samsung actually unveiled two damn good phones, the Galaxy S8 and S8+. We wouldn't be so cruel as to put you through the hour-plus ordeal, though, dear reader. We've condensed the whole thing down to nine minutes, so you can catch all the highlights -- Bixby! Infinite displays! Super selfies! Flame-free! -- and none of the tedium. Enjoy.