PuppyTweets
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Mattel Puppy Tweets review
Though Twitter has become a greater professional tool than we'd imagine anyone ever intended it's still hard to take the service too seriously. We like silly twitterers, whether they be offering pretend writing advice, charting the reclusive tendencies of Hollywood's leading men, or just threatening to force choke any troll who gets in their way. Wouldn't it be fun if your pooch could get in on those antics? No, as it turns out, it isn't that fun at all. %Gallery-109426%
Puppy Tweets will turn your Pooper into a world-class twitterer (Updated: with hands-on pictures!)
If you thought the downfall of Twitter began when Oprah said it was the best thing ever, well, you're probably right, but this latest toy from Mattel won't help to improve the situation. It's called Puppy Tweets, a little clasp that hangs from your pooch's collar and detects what it's up to -- presumably making wild guesses based on accelerometer and microphone readings. It was announced last month and is being shown off at the NY Toy Fair, where Mattel is pledging it can detect 500 different activities and turn them into 140-character witticisms, like: "It's not the catching of the tail, it's the chase," and "Guess what I'm licking right now." Yep, a real product, and $30 will get you yours in either pink or blue. Update: We had to check this thing out for ourselves at the Toy Fair today. Unfortunately, there wasn't a real pup on hand to demo, but we did confirm that this lightweight plastic collar can, as previously mentioned, tweet everything from licks to resulting carpet stains. Included in the box is a matching USB dongle which contains software that works with the collar to enable the Wi-Fi updates. It won't hit shelves until June, but check the gallery below. %Gallery-85482%
Puppy Tweets lets your puppy... tweet
Apple might think it's going to change the world tomorrow with some sort of crazy tablet, but we're here to tell you that the world has already changed. American humans will soon be able to buy a product called "Puppy Tweets," a product actually designed, tested, and released by the Mattel corporation. First, you need a dog with a Twitter account. (Who doesn't have one of those?) Then, you need to use $30 of your actual money to buy Puppy Tweets, a plastic sound-and-motion sensor that clips onto your dog's collar and sends out several pre-written tweets that have extreme amounts of dignity, like "YAHOOOOOOO! Somedays you just gotta get your bark on." Then you have to weep gently for the future of our society.
