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The cynic's guide to World of Warcraft
We tend to be very careful while composing articles here at WoW Insider. We're always mindful that not everyone plays the game in the same way, or has the same experience on different servers or factions, but every so often a certain madness seizes us and we feel the urge to ... tell the truth. In that vein, I am pleased (sort of) to present The Cynic's Guide to World of Warcraft. This article owes a heavy debt to Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary. If you want to see a real master at work, read that.
Portal receives radio patch, tunes in hints of a sequel
Valve has released a new patch for Portal on Steam, and the patch notes say only that it has "changed radio transmission frequency to comply with federal and state spectrum management regulations." A curious note, especially since Portal, as a computer game, doesn't actually transmit anything over the radio. That got the forum train a'moving on the Steam boards, and they eventually discovered that radios have been added to each level of the game which, when carried to the correct spots in each level, will tune in a series of coded messages. Connecting to all (or any, according to some reports) of the 26 messages in the game will supposedly unlock a new hidden achievement called "Transmission Received." At least, we think so -- as of this writing, no one seems to have unlocked it yet. Some of the messages are morse codes that range from the technical ("External data line active") to the silly ("Beep beep beep beep"), and some are encoded images of numbers and equations ("B.dA=3"), but the whole thing appears to be hinting that AI antagonist GLaDOS may have transmitted information or part of herself out of the Aperture Science facility before the first game ended. Which would probably mean that a sequel reveal is imminent. We'll stay tuned for more information -- we didn't really expect to hear from Valve at GDC next week, but a Portal 2 reveal would make our San Francisco visit that much nicer. [Thanks, Rob!]
10 billionth iTunes download going down today
Obama Pacman has done the math, and they claim that the 10 billionth song download on iTunes (which Apple is paying out a $10k gift card for) is going to happen today, February 24th. So if you've been waiting to buy some music, today's the day to do it -- go pick up some songs in the early to late evening, and you might end up being the lucky winner. Plus, contest aside, this means Apple will have sold 10 billion songs on their store. That's an incredible number, and it's a number that has changed this industry for sure. Fortune's Brainstorm Tech blog has a nice short look at just what that means for the store itself, including the fact that the store is now making over $520 million a quarter (even though Apple says that it's only slightly profitable for them, as they're more interested in hardware than content) and that the Black Eyed Peas have two of the top 20 best-selling songs of all time, the first and the third. Pretty incredible achievement for Apple, and with the iPad on the way, I'll bet the iTunes store will only get busier. We'll keep an eye open for the official announcement this evening. Good luck if you're trying for the prize!
Paragon scores world-first legitimate 25-man Lich King kill
GuildOx reports that Paragon, from the European Lightning's Blade realm, has defeated the Lich King and acquired the Frozen Throne achievement. While well-known guild Ensidia had defeated him yesterday on 25-man difficulty, they also employed some dubious techniques to win and later paid the price for it by having their loot and achievements removed. Paragon, on the other hand, appears to have completed the encounter in an exploit-free manner and, according to MMO-Champion's Boubouille, did it on their first try. Congratulations go out to Paragon on their clean kill. Now let's see some of those heroic achievements!
Breakfast topic: How far is your guild in Icecrown Citadel?
This is it. The final gates of Icecrown have been opened up. If you need help, we have overviews and other resources to the encounters right here. While I'd guess that the majority of us aren't exactly competing for world firsts or even server firsts, progression is still progression. I know starting out that I had my own internal expectations of where our guild would be at and we've met them. We haven't cleared out all the new bosses yet but I know with time, we will be able to. Along the way, we managed to score a few unexpected achievements. I for one didn't recall going after The Orb Whisperer. Anyway, some guilds take their progression seriously. In fact, I think there are a few out there who purposely used a lockout from the previous week just to have the extra time advantage to work on Valithria and Sindragosa. What about your raid groups? Are you happy with how you're progressing so far? Did they surpass your wildest dreams or are you discontent and think you should be further ahead?
Achievements across the genre
By now, you've likely heard of the World of Warcraft player who managed to fill out every single achievement in the game, covering every single currently measurable objective. (If not, well, there you go.) Bio Break recently took the opportunity to discuss achievements as an interesting social feature in MMOs, a way of building community, while Overly Positive took the news as incentive to expound on achievements as an alternate venue for advancement. Most of the major titles out at the moment have some form of achievement system in place, ranging from Warhammer Online's Tome of Knowledge to City of Heroes and its variety of badges. The problems with the system are brought up in the comments of the above entries -- achievements can often wind up being used as a form of highly-prohibitive gating, where someone lacking the completion achievement isn't capable of getting a group to move through it. As a whole, though, it allows for people to enjoy an entirely different venue of the game, and offers motivation to perform content that would otherwise be gathering dust after a certain point. Wherever you play, achievement markers are becoming more and more ubiquitous, and the fact that clearing them out is newsworthy just shows the degree to which they've permeated our consciousness and the genre.
Breakfast Topic: Achievements and you
Ah, achievements, that funny little meta-game where everything's made up and the points don't matter. Why, oh why, do we flock to World of Warcraft's achievement system so? Of course, we all look forward to achievements with particularly lucrative rewards (or at least interesting titles), but many of the game's achievements, the only reward to look forward to is achievement points. And while you can certainly take some joy from watching those numbers build up, the points, essentially, don't matter. So what is it that keeps us hungering to complete even the silliest of achievements? Is it a passion for completism that prevents you from leaving these lists undone? Is it a need to prove yourself better or more dedicated than your fellow player? Is it the faint hope that some day Blizzard will reward your tedious labors with appropriately awesome swag? Is it the sense of accomplishment whenever an "achievement complete" alert pops up? Tell us -- what keeps you achieving?
Patch 3.3 PTR: New and updated achievements on the PTR
There's been a few achievements that have been added in the latest patch 3.3 build. As you can guess, taking down the Lich King has its rewards. If you manage to defeat Arthas in Icecrown Citadel in 10-player heroic mode, you will henceforth earn the title "Bane of the Fallen King." A new faction for you to earn reputation with will be established as well. The Ashen Verdict, if you manage to earn exalted with them, will grant you a title reward that adds "Of the Ashen Verdict." No serious details yet on how to grind out rep, but when I was on the PTR clearing trash to Festergut, I noticed I was gaining Ashen Verdict reputation by killing various mobs. They're similar to the rates players earned rep with when working through Black Temple for the Ashtongue. Arena players have a new title and a Frostwyrm pet to look forward to for season 8. Good luck on earning the Wrathful Gladiator title! The players who are more into battlegrounds will be experiencing change as well. The achievements to gain exalted with Warsong Gulch, Arathi Basin, and Alterac Valley factions have been removed from their Meta-Achievements. You'll gain special titles if you manage to reach exalted with the factions at least. Glory of the Hero Meta-Achievement has been slightly changed. The Party's Over achievement which involves killing Prince Taldaram on Heroic with under 5 people is no longer part of that particular meta. Although, personally I don't think it's that difficult to take out that boss with 4 players. Lastly, in case you missed the news earlier, Master Angler of Stranglethorn has been changed. It will be changed to Master Angler of Azeroth instead. You can gain this achievement by winning the Kalu'ak Fishing Derby or the Stranglethorn Fishing Extravaganza. Patch 3.3 is the last major patch of Wrath of the Lich King. With the new Icecrown Citadel 5-man dungeons and 10/25-man raid arriving soon, patch 3.3 will deal the final blow to the Arthas. WoW.com's Guide to Patch 3.3 will keep you updated with all the latest patch news.
Nibuca's route for picking up candy
Unfortunately, even though I really want "The Hallowed" on my Paladin, he's not quite 80, so going to face the Headless Horseman will be a problem for me. But I may still run around and pick up all of the candy quests, now that they're up and running during Hallow's End. They're only a part of the big meta-achievement, but it might be worth getting them out of the way anyway, and the XP is supposed to be pretty good (especially if you're getting the Heirloom bonuses, which I am).If I do go, I'll be using Nibuca's handy route to all of the candy buckets -- she went through for you and figured out the quickest and easiest (or at least a quicker and easier -- it may not be perfect, as she says, but it works) way around to all of the candy quests in old Azeroth and Outland. You'll have to do Northrend on your own, but you may want to wait on that anyway, as it's supposed to be slightly bugged. If you are planning on getting all of your just desserts this year, Nibuca's route should be extremely helpful.
WRUP: Ziebart craves brains edition
Well, here we are at the weekend, and yet again we're all in danger. Alex Ziebart has been bitten by the dread PTR and is stalking the halls of Wow.com central, craving our succulent brains and/or posts about patch 3.3, while we struggle to survive. Or to provide him with PTR posts and patch details like, say, Quel'Delar, This weekend, it's not just a game, it's a battle to survive against a fiend more dead than alive! Well, until he gets his morning nosh, then he's usually okay. Woe betide thee that denies said nosh! A peckish zombie is a fearful adversary. Luckily, I have a character skilled in dealing with the undead and he just got himself a new toy.But what about the gaming, you ask? I'm glad you did, because I'm awful at segues. Seriously, just awful. I mean, look at this one, it's just atrocious.
Cooking for the holidays
Artwair complains over on the forums that there is cooking required for the What a Long, Strange Trip It's Been achievement (that some of you have done -- grats! -- and others of you are deciding to do in the next year), saying that something as significant as leveling up Cooking all the way shouldn't be required for what is basically an optional achievement. But Kisirani replies with as good an answer as you'll find: the achievement is designed to send you all over the world, including to some professions and abilities that you wouldn't be leveling otherwise. Especially because the achievement is optional, it's not out-of-place to ask for some cooking to happen. And I'll add that cooking is worth leveling anyway -- not only does it get you some nice buffs, let you use up some of the trash collecting in you bags, and hook up your guild or raid with some excellent items, but it's pretty easy to do, especially if you do it with fishing (which is also very useful by itself).While she's at it, Kisirani also provides a nice tease at Pilgrim's Bounty, which isn't a part of the big meta-achievement anyway, but will have some extra recipes to find and cook, as well as a new Thanksgiving-style celebration (two words: "Turkey shooter"). Can't wait to see it.
WRUP: Brewfest is back edition
What's the WoW.com team playing this weekend? What are the WoW.com readers playing this weekend? Even before looking at our highly scientific poll data, I think it's safe to say that quite a few of have our eyes on the prize (which is to say one Violet Proto-Drake) and are working on Brewfest achievements. But as one or two of the team still insist on maintaining independent thought and action, below I have included a list of what we're all playing this weekend -- including those of us who aren't bothering with Brewfest.
Pacifist Priest dings 80 on Friday
Reinisch is the pacifist Undead Priest who's aiming to make it to level 80 without killing anything at all (he's the same player as Noor, who we interviewed way back when and followed up with a while ago), and apparently this Friday, he's going to do it. He's inviting everybody out to a party on Friday afternoon, September 4th, at 6pm server over on The Venture Company. He's going to turn in a Dalaran fishing quest to do it, and he's got quick and easy directions posted on how to get to Dalaran as a level 1.Though there might not be as much going on as other big server parties, it's probably worth going just to see him ding level 80 and the level 1 chaos in Dalaran that will ensue, but it's quite an achievement for sure, especially considering that this Priest was actually created before Noor -- he's named after a German priest who stood up to Hitler in the name of peace and was executed for it. It might be nice just to stop by and give the guy a grats as he dings -- pretty impressive to take a goal that most people would say was impossible, and do it in the game not once but twice on two different classes and factions.
Freeverse goes with ngmoco's Plus+ for iPhone social gaming
Freeverse has picked a partner in the ongoing dance of social gaming networks on the iPhone. They've joined up with ngmoco and their Plus+ system for all of their games, including Flick Bowling, Flick Fishing, and Moto Thunder. The first Freeverse game to use the system (which allows players to earn points across games, track friends' playing habits, and vie for the tops of leaderboards) will be an upcoming title called Warpgate, and then it'll be ported back to the already-released games as well. This is actually a fairly big shot across the board of other networks vying for players, including Aurora Feint's OpenFeint, Chillingo's Crystal SDK, Scoreloop, and a few other competing services. ngmoco had originally announced that their Plus+ service would be proprietary to the titles that they published, but the inclusion of Freeverse as a partner means they're likely headhunting for quality titles to add to the mix, much like everyone else. To a certain extent, this is a behind-the-scenes battle -- consumers will likely choose games based on what they want to play, not necessarily on what social network they're hooked into. It's as if Microsoft, instead of having the overarching Xbox Live system, left it up to developers to award and track achievement points. But you have to think that one big player will emerge here, and then it'll be interesting to see what kinds of rewards the devs who connected with that system will reap. [via TouchArcade]
Did you finish the Fire Festival?
That hot time of the year, the Midsummer Fire Festival, has now ended. Once again the denizens of Azeroth go about their humdrum lives without any brilliant fires and spirited naked flame-ladies dancing to and fro on the bridges of Ironforge. Life is boring. The Ice Stone Has Melted.But alas, not for I and my tabard! After a good half day of solid grinding I trekked my Paladin throughout the dunes of Kalimdor and the lush forests of the Eastern Kingdom, extinguishing the flames of the bastard Horde and honoring those of the blessed Alliance. All was done well, so say we all.It didn't take long though for me to realize that I didn't want to do this on more than my main. However I found myself exerting as much discipline as possible to finish the dailies every day on my dual boxing Recruit a Friend alts, pulling in about 50% of a level each day just from the daily quests alone. It was quite a nice XP bump.All in all I accomplished with the Fire Festival I wanted to, and it wasn't too bad of a time. Although I can definitely wait a year to extinguish another flame.Did you accomplish everything you wanted to with the Fire Festival? Are you satisfied?%Poll-31583%
New pet and mounts achievements coming soon
You're a pet and mount maniac. You've hunted down every noncombat pet you can find, gotten a lucky roll on every rare mount you can possibly pick up, and after long last, you've earned both the "Lil' Game Hunter" and "Mountain o' Mounts" achievements. But still, you want more for some reason. More pets, more mounts, more achievement points.Good news: Bornakk says that there will still be more to find. While he says they won't be upping the achievements every time they bring out a patch that has more pets and mounts to collect, they will definitely add in new achievements periodically for collecting both noncombat pets and mounts (and, though he doesn't say so, we'd assume they'll add in extra rewards besides the achievement points, including extra pets or mounts to be earned at each level).So if you are in fact a collecting master and have already earned the 75 pets and 100 mounts (a much easier feat than it used to be) for both maximum achievements currently in the game, just be patient. There'll be new goals to go after soon.
Patch 3.2 PTR now live
The wait for the new content patch may have just gotten a little shorter! The files for Patch 3.2, Call of the Crusade, are now available for download from the official site (or any number of other mirrors, at this point), and the PTR realms are up.MMO-Champion and a number of other sites have datamined information from the files, including new achievements, holidays, and names of the Coliseum bosses, which we've compiled for you. We'll keep you updated with any new information we get regarding 3.2, including the current status of the PTR, as events warrant. Get psyched! Patch 3.2 will bring about a new 5, 10, and 25 man instance to WoW, and usher in a new 40-man battleground called the Isle of Conquest. WoW.com will have you covered every step of the way, from extensive PTR coverage through the official live release. Check out WoW.com's Guide to Patch 3.2 for all the latest!
Maybe Ulduar drakes aren't going away in 3.2 after all
We had a bit of a minor freakout when we heard that the Rusted and Ironbound protodrakes might be getting removed as rewards for the Ulduar meta achievements in Patch 3.2, and then even more of one when the slow trickle of information about 3.2 turned into a firehose. Bornakk mentioned the change initially with the caveat that it was their intention to remove the drakes eventually, but that he'd seek definite confirmation either way as to whether it was happening in 3.2 or not. There's been no update about it in the past few weeks. Well, after a thorough reading of the 3.2 patch notes, I don't see a single trace of anything saying the drakes are getting removed. At the risk of counting my protochickens before they hatch, I think we might be safe, given how fast 3.2 looks like it's coming out. This is at least a relief for my guild, who's doing pretty well on 10-man hard-mode progression but ... is there a word worse than "dismal"? ... on 25-man hard-modes. Maybe there's hope for us yet.Should we get the soul-crushing confirmation that they'll be removed with 3.2, we'll be sure to let you know. There's still a lot of time for change on this one, though -- maybe it was an accidental omission, maybe it'll get decided on later -- but for now, you can breathe a little easier knowing you might be able to keep hacking away at those hard modes to get your undeniably awesome drakes even after the Argent Coliseum is commanding your guild's attention. Patch 3.2 will bring about a new 5, 10, and 25 man instance to WoW, and usher in a new 40-man battleground called the Isle of Conquest. WoW.com will have you covered every step of the way, from extensive PTR coverage through the official live release. Check out WoW.com's Guide to Patch 3.2 for all the latest!
The best of WoW.com: June 2-9, 2009
WoW Insider is now WoW.com, if you haven't yet heard, but don't worry: we still have everything you need to know about the world's most popular massively multiplayer online game, from tips and tricks to news and views. Here's our most popular posts from the past week, including news about all the new Druid forms above -- if it's in Azeroth, we've got news about it, just for you. News Beware of Blood Elves selling mountsOne of our writers' friends falls prey to the game's newest scam. Achieved: Level 1 to 80 with no deathsA character appropriately named Cautious reached the highest level in the game without dying once. Revamped Night Elf Druid cat forms revealedNew looks for Night Elf Druids. Zarhym explains Druid form color combosWant to make sure your Druid has the form you want? Here's how. Ensidia gets world-first Algalon 25-man killOne of the game's biggest pro guilds downs the last major boss in the current content. Features An interview with a scammerThe perp in the article above gets the WoW.com interview spotlight shined on him. WoW, Casually: Rating the classes for casualsWhich class is best to play for a casual player? Arcane Brilliance: Reaching the hit capMages, here's how to make the most out of those spells you're casting. The lore of UlduarThe latest game dungeon has more than a few hooks and hints into the rest of the World of Warcraft. The Queue: WaterfallsOur Q&A column will actually go chasing waterfalls to find answers to your questions. Not just stick to the rivers and the lakes that they're used to.
Achieved: Level 1 to 80 with no deaths
There are a few accomplishments in this game that truly amaze me anymore. Leveling characters is routine now, and having an army of high level alts at your disposal isn't something super uncommon anymore. However I have been amazed by this:Cautious, a Warrior, leveled to 80 without dying.She had no deaths. None. Nada. Zilch.There is no achievement for doing this, however I wouldn't blame Blizzard one bit if they went in and retroactively added one just for Cautious. Lord of the Rings Online has a no-death achievement, but only up through level 20. I got to level 18 without dying on LotRO on a recent attempt, however I perished when some "really really super awesome person" trained a bunch of mobs near me just as I executed an AoE attack. "Really really super awesome person" is what I called him too. Honest.A few months ago in The Queue a reader asked if there would ever be (or is) such an achievement for WoW, and my response at the time was no, there is not one now and probably would not be one later. I reasoned that including such an achievement would just present undue psychological damage on the player if they died at 79 from an unforeseen circumstance. I still don't think there will be one, but it's pretty awesome someone managed to do it sans in-game achievement. There are some interesting statistics Cautious had upon reaching level 80 without deaths. You can check out a lot of them on her armory profile, but those are inflated just a tad since she has played since reaching 80. Some of her key stats upon reaching level 80 include:
