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Goat Simulator 3's headbutting mayhem finally arrives on mobile
Everyone's favorite hooved menace is back on mobile with the launch of Goat Simulator 3 for iOS and Android.
The best farm animal simulator on Mac is turning into an MMO
Goat Simulator is one of the best games of the year -- no, seriously, you can waste a whole lot of time doing absolutely nothing as a goat -- and now it's getting a ridiculous update that is going to make it even more of a time-sink. This Thursday, the PC version of the game is getting a patch that will turn it into a multiplayer game, and not just a multiplayer game, but a multiplayer fantasy RPG. What a time to be alive! Previously, Goat Simulator's main draw was just how absurd it was to run around as a goat, beat up some unsuspecting humans, and maybe get run over by a car or three. It's not clear how much the new update will change that, but from the video teaser released by developer Coffee Stain Studios, it's clear that the absurdity is still very much alive and well. Unfortunately, game designer Armin Ibrisagic tells me that the company doesn't currently have plans to bring the MMO update to the iOS version of the game, though that could change somewhere down the line. If you're expecting anything resembling a traditional MMO experience here, you should probably revise your expectations a bit. There appears to be an XP system, and there are definitely character classes and a new Skyrim-esque setting, but don't expect it to give you a reason to cancel your World of Warcraft subscription.
Goat MMO Simulator will WoW fans for free later this week
If you're a MMO player LFG - Looking For Goats - then you're probably mad. You're also exactly the kind of oddball who'll be interested by Goat MMO Simulator, a free expansion for Goat Simulator that's releasing on Steam this Thursday, November 20. Note the placement of MMO in the title; as developer Coffee Stain Studios puts it, the patch delivers "MMO simulation so good you'll think it's real." Regardless, the DLC features five classes that include Warrior, Rouge (yes, Rouge) and Microwave (still yes, Microwave.) The level cap is 101, sheep and goat factions are at war, and there are mermaids. And, 'cos it's Goat Simulator, there's another great trailer to watch below the break.
Goat Simulator gets 100,000 sales on iOS, Android
Coffee Stain Studios has sold more than 100,000 copies of Goat Simulator across Android and iOS, after launching on those platforms five days ago. That's not baaah-d. Sorry, we really rammed that joke in there, didn't we? We kid, we kid. "It feels really amazing that so many people like our game!" designer Armin Ibrisagic writes on the Coffee Stain blog. "We're also really happy that we can now reach out to even more goat fans, and that people without a computer can now also enjoy the life of being a goat!" In terms of updates, Coffee Stain is currently focused on squashing any crash bugs on mobile. The studio is aware of the issues on Android devices listed here. "While we realize you might be super curious of our future plans, the truth is actually that we don't plan much ahead at all [....] But after a couple of weeks we'll see how it goes! Hopefully we'll be able to give you more information then." Goat Simulator hit "almost 1 million" sales in August, and Coffee Stain recouped the game's development costs within ten minutes of launch on Steam (on April 1, of course). [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Goat Simulator gives us the billies on iOS, Android
Goat Simulator puts the dumb into smartphones starting today, and it's available to purchase on iOS and Android now. The ports of Coffee Stain Studios' ridiculous phenomenon are priced $5, and the studio proudly proclaims they include "all the bugs from the PC version." Goat Simulator can be boiled down to causing as much physical destruction as possible with a goat... or other animals which Coffee Stain claims are goats too. The Sanctum dev admits it's a "completely stupid game" with "millions of bugs," but it's also a game with almost one million sales, largely thanks to an inspired marketing campaign that riffed on Dead Island's own viral trailer. The buck doesn't stop with the mobile ports, because Goat Simulator is also flying onto Xbox One, courtesy of LittleBigPlanet Vita co-developer Double Eleven. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Goat Simulator makes big bucks with 'almost 1 million' sales
Of all the many "simulator" games, Goat Simulator stands out as one of the silliest and craziest to catch heat. That's reflected by the game's sales to date of "almost 1 million," as announced by Coffee Stain Studio's Armin Ibrisagic at GDC Europe this morning. It's no surprise, then, that the studio's now working on bringing the game to iOS and Android. To ram those figures home, Ibrisagic said Coffee Stain made back the money it invested into Goat Simulator in "ten minutes." Perhaps crazier, the game generated more revenue in four months than the studio had made in the previous four years. Goat Simulator represents a surreal and unexpected success for the Sanctum studio, which, as Ibrisagic explained, approached the game as no more than a light-hearted change of pace after working on a far more serious tower-defense series for years. The moment Coffee Stain realized it had to make Goat Simulator into a real game was when its debut trailer racked up a million views. The studio diverted all employees to working on it and rapidly started adding content to it ahead of its - no kidding - April 1 release. That extra content included a giraffe - after all, according to Ibrisagic, all animals are goats. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
NIS America to pay agreed pledge for GaymerX2 [Update]
Just yesterday, NIS America stepped away from its $3,000 pledge to cover costs for the GaymerX2 convention held in San Francisco on July 11 through July 13. According to the LGBTQ-focused event's founder Matt Conn, the situation between both parties is currently being resolved, and will result in NIS America agreeing to pay the full amount it promised to the event holders. "After talking with their team, [NIS America] have apologized for the misunderstanding and offered to make right and pay the full amount that they agreed upon," Conn told Joystiq via email. "We have apologized for escalating it to a public level so quickly and we are pleased with how quickly they offered to resolve the situation and make right on their promise, and we harbor no ill will towards them."
Deep Silver unleashes Goat Simulator in NA stores this July
Goat Simulator has been available as a Steam download since April 1, but this is a physical game about physical things getting physically wrecked by a very physical goat; doesn't it deserve a physical release? Deep Silver thinks so, which is why it's acquired North American distribution rights from developer Coffee Stain Studios. You'll be able to pick up a boxed copy of the game at participating retail stores starting in mid-July. Thankfully, while goats are known to eat just about anything, this even-toed ungulate will go easy on your cash. The boxed copy - like its Steam counterpart - will cost $9.99. Of course, the goat-in-a-game-shop news might sound familiar to those living across the pond; it's been available in UK stores since May. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Non-violent platformer A Story About My Uncle debuts on Steam
Just when you thought Coffee Stain Studios was only capable of delivering games focused on rude livestock, the Goat Simulator publisher takes things in an entirely different direction with Gone North Games' thoughtful, gorgeous A Story About My Uncle. The game, which has just appeared on Steam, tells the tale of a young man searching for his uncle inside a fantastical realm full of vibrant colors and otherworldly structures. Instead of simply wandering through the place, our protagonist comes across a handy device best imagined as an energy-based grappling hook with which he can swing from platform to platform. While not a wholly original idea, once you're acquainted with the in-game physics of A Story About My Uncle, the freedom of motion it offers completely overshadows the game's notably contrarian lack of blood and guts. Those interested in A Story About My Uncle can find the game on Steam at a price of $13 - unless you act quickly. From now until June 4, A Story About My Uncle features a 10 percent discount, reducing its price to $11.69. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Goat Simulator sees Minecraft makeover in 1.1 patch
Among the additions coming to Goat Simulator in its imminent 1.1 patch is a new aesthetic option modeled after the Cubist paradise that is Minecraft. Having noticed our borderline-obsessive fixation on Goat Simulator, designer Armin Ibrisagic sent over the handful of screenshots found in the below gallery. "Now you'll be able to play the world's most popular game inside the world's best game," Ibrisagic said, offering no further explanation. As we mentioned, the 1.1 patch is now slated to hit Goat Simulator on June 3. Alongside this new Minecraft-style aesthetic option, it will bring with it splitscreen multiplayer, goat parkour and a handful of new goats. We still have no idea what the "Shopping Goat" might be, though we expect more information once the patch debuts. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Goat Simulator 1.1 headbutts your PC on June 3
Old dogs may be a lost cause, but old goats can definitely be taught new tricks - for proof, look no further than the 1.1 update now slated to reach Goat Simulator on June 3. Though originally scheduled to launch in May, developer Coffee Stain Studios opted to delay the release of the 1.1 patch to ensure that players would receive only the finest in barnyard shenanigans. "We realise we said we'd release the patch in May, but we really wanted to shock players and make sure the new map will be even better than the old one, so we had to push forth the release date a week or so than we originally intended," said designer Armin Ibrisagic. "With June 3rd as a release date, the new map is gonna be so awesome, and I'm not just saying that cause I'm working on the game." Alongside the new map (which Coffee Stain Studios claims is "roughly the size of the old map") the free 1.1 update also brings with it splitscreen multiplayer for up to four would-be goats, goat parkour and goats that have inexplicably learned to ride both bicycles and skateboards. New breeds of goat are also found in the update, including the Tornado Goat, Classy Goat and Shopping Goat. What's a "Shopping Goat?" We've got no idea. Just roll with it, and hope June 3 brings some sort of explanation. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
First-person platformer A Story About My Uncle hits Steam this month
Developer Gone North Games has partnered with Goat Simulator creator Coffee Stain Studios to publish a Steam version of its first-person adventure game A Story About My Uncle later this month. Originally released as a freeware university project in 2012, A Story About My Uncle has since expanded into a fully fledged narrative-driven platformer. Gameplay is driven by mid-air momentum, as players use a grappling hook-like power to climb and swing through an array of fanciful suspended environments. A Story About My Uncle will hit Steam on May 28. [Video: Coffee Stain Studios]
Sanctum 2 postmortem talks big ideas, low console sales
When the standard challenges of game development combine with advancing a series and learning to port to consoles, it's easy to imagine how things could become overwhelming. Sanctum 2 developer Coffee Stain Studios persevered from building the sequel to its first-person-shooter tower defense hybrid, but co-founder Johannes Aspeby's postmortem on the game, posted on Gamaustra, covers what was learned along the way. Coffee Stain initially envisioned a "free mazing" system, which would have let players set their own start and end points for mazes, but the concept was ultimately scrapped six months into development due to the team constantly discovering new flaws. Aspeby explained that changes weren't just limited to pre-development, either - at launch, Sanctum 2 spawned materials in the team base rather than automatically allocating them between players. This was meant to encourage sharing and to avoid making one player build every round, but it resulted in teammates racing each other to horde materials for themselves. Coffee Stain's internal testing didn't catch the problem, but the team is now hyper aware of the difference in atmosphere between an acquainted studio and a bunch of strangers playing a game online together. Bringing the game to Xbox 360 and PS3 meant dealing with the Technical Certification Process, which Coffee Stain allotted a few weeks for in order to find and fix any problems. Realizing the process' time sink led the team to hand off testing to another company, allowing Coffee Stain to solely focus on fixing problems, not discovering them. Performance issues also surfaced with the console versions, resulting in enemy and tower limits, as well as alterations to Sanctum 2's environments, like building walls to limit draw distance. This affected the PC version as well, as Aspeby noted the studio wasn't able to just make a different version for Steam. Aspeby estimated that a third of Sanctum 2's development time was spent getting the game ready for consoles, but added that in terms of sales, the payoff "hasn't been anywhere near the work." Sales on PS3 were particularly low, keeping the studio from even considering bringing Sanctum 2's season pass content to that console. Aspeby still seems optimistic about the experience though, concluding that the team "still had a hell of a good time, learned a lot, and made enough money so that we could continue making video games." [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Goat Simulator to rampage across the UK in boxed release
The only thing more fun than a barrel full of monkeys is a box full of goats, and that's exactly what Coffee Stain Studios has planned for the citizens of the UK. Koch Media, Goat Simulator's UK publisher, broke the news this morning, saying that the physical version of the Internet's favorite antisocial livestock simulator will reach retailers on May 23. No additional content is planned for the physical release, but buyers will receive a box emblazoned with the face of Satan's most cuddly terrestrial envoy. Notably lacking from the announcement was any word on what price point might be attached to the physical release. In addition to word of this physical version of Goat Simulator, developer Coffee Stain Studios has detailed the game's upcoming 1.1 patch with a video that is sadly exclusive to Facebook. The highlight, both of this clip and likely of your day, is goat parkour. If those two words didn't immediately send you scrambling for the "Play" button, you're probably dead. Joystiq offers its condolences. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Goat Simulator now available for barnyard mischief on Steam
Leave it to Coffee Stain Studios to deliver totally serious news on April Fool's Day: The indie developer launches Goat Simulator on Steam today. For $9.99, PC players can raise hell as the adorably mischievous goat, scoring points by breaking items as they would in a game like Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, save for the epic tricks. To whet the appetites of today's unfunny pranksters, Coffee Stain Studios did offer goofy "release day patch notes" in Goat Simulator's official Steam forums. The day-one patch "added more goats," "added more goatiness to the map," increased "goat tongue realism" by 25 percent and "probably added some bugs." The patch did not change the goat in the game to a hawk, which would have made more sense of our conversation with the developer at the Game Developer's Conference in March. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Goat Simulator launch trailer kids around with Dead Island
Between Escape Goat 2 and Goat Simulator, wow: Goats, so hot right now. Remember that launch trailer for Dead Island from a few years back that caught so much attention? Well, prepare to never view it the same way again. Coffee Stain Studios' game is the "latest in goat simulation technology, bringing next-gen goat simulation to YOU." The dev isn't lying: If you're going to run Goat Simulator just be sure you've got plenty of ram. For more on Goat Simulator, including why all animals are in fact goats, check out our in-depth GDC interview with Coffee Stain's Armin Ibrasagic. The game hits Steam on April 1*. *Of course it does. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Why Goat Simulator is secretly a Hawk simulator
Getting the gist of Goat Simulator isn't that hard, even if the title conjures the image of cute, semi-evil livestock munching on a tranquil mountaintop. What we have here is a misappropriation of computational cycles – not to mention the Unreal engine – to render an obnoxious, destructive beast that lives to ruin a generic suburb. But there is a game in there, not just a joke. Developer Armin Ibrasagic of Coffee Stain Studios (Sanctum) explained his design inspiration to us during the Game Developers Conference, ahead of Goat Simulator's wide release through Steam on April 1. Based on our dumb video above, the argument goes something like this: 1) Goat Simulator depicts and encourages the ram-ifications of being near an insane goat. 2) Since all animals are goats – just watch the video – it follows that all animals are simulated here. 3) Hawks are animals. 4) Pro skater Tony Hawk is part of the Hawk family and is therefore an animal. 5) It follows that Goat Simulator is simulating Tony Hawk, "except instead of a skater you're a goat, and instead of doing tricks you make people angry."
Internet darling Goat Simulator crashes into Steam on April Fool's Day
Coffee Stain Studios, the indie developers behind bizarre Joystiq fixation Goat Simulator, have revealed a release date for the odd little game: April 1 - appropriately, April Fool's Day. Alongside the release date, the developers have also revealed a bit of additional information on Goat Simulator. Thanks to the game's website we now know that Goat Simulator will only appear on PC, and that it will not feature any multiplayer functionality. While Coffee Stain Studios plans to keep the core gameplay in Goat Simulator "small and silly," the developer is working on adding Steam Workshop support so that players can create new levels for their four-legged avatars to ruin in a flurry of barnyard hijinks. Goat Simulator has yet to appear on Steam, but Coffee Stain Studios is still allowing prospective virtual goats to pre-order the game via its website. The asking price is $10, but includes access to a beta test for those who can't wait to live out their inexplicable dreams of being antisocial livestock. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Gone North Games forgoes violence to tell A Story About My Uncle
Though exceedingly common in video games, blood and guts are not a necessary component of good design - an oft-forgotten point that developer Gone North Games hopes to demonstrate with its upcoming indie platformer A Story About My Uncle. Officially described as a "non-violent first-person platform adventure game built in the Unreal Engine," A Story About My Uncle tells the tale of a boy searching for his lost uncle, only instead of finding him down at the pub or watching a baseball game, our protagonist somehow stumbles upon a fantastic world. We urge you to watch the trailer above, as it reiterates all those plot points we just mentioned but does so with the aid of attractive, intriguing visuals. Originally conceived as a university project, A Story About My Uncle was nominated for a Swedish game of the year award in 2012. That success drew the attention of Coffee Stain Studios - the people responsible for the baffling yet mesmerizing Goat Simulator - which now plans to publish A Story About My Uncle on Steam at some point in 2014. [Image: Gone North Games]
The Internet has spoken, Goat Simulator now available for pre-order
As we mentioned last week, the Internet loves few things more than fuzzy creatures and wanton destruction, so it comes as little surprise to learn that Goat Simulator has received enough online affection to transform the Global Game Jam entry into a full-fledged game. "OKAY INTERNET YOU WIN, IT LOOKS LIKE GOAT SIMULATOR IS OUR NEXT IP," wrote Swedish developer Coffee Stain Studios, before delving into what is arguably a description of the game. "Goat Simulator is like an old school skating game, except instead of being a skater, you're a goat, and instead of doing tricks, you wreck stuff. It brings next-gen goat simulation to YOU. WASD to write history." Pay a visit to the newly-launched Goat Simulator website and at the bottom you'll find a pre-order form asking for $10. There's currently no word on when Goat Simulator will be released, nor any in-depth information on what the game will be like once completed, beyond the trailer's promise that your goat will be able to wield an axe with its tongue. Still, we can't see that mattering much. If the online masses want goat mischief, the online masses will get goat mischief, no matter what form it may take. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
