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Top 5: Statements That Will Get You Punched in the Face By a Nintendo Fanboy
var digg_url = 'http://digg.com/nintendo/5_Statements_That_Will_Get_You_Punched_By_a_Nintendo_Fanboy'; "To each their own." It's a simple rule that, if universally followed, could result in world peace. On the other hand, if people didn't go online to bitch at each other about video games, then many bloggers would be collecting unemployment. I can't speak for every other hobby that exists, but I imagine that fly-fishing and glass-blowing message boards are considerably more pleasant than gaming forums. So as it is, the gaming world is chock full of debate. Hrmm, scratch that. The word "debate" conjures impressions of two well-groomed individuals standing behind podiums and taking turns eloquently addressing issues presented to them by a moderator. For every one of these moments, you get a couple thousand boring ones. But when the forum is switched to the Internet, the dialogue transforms into a partisan torrent of vitriol. While political campaigning may be viewed as a chess match between experts, an appropriate metaphor for gaming and Internet debate in general can be found in the gigantic brawl at the end of 1977's Slap Shot. In particular, Nintendo fanboys seem to simultaneously be a large source of and recipients to such slander. Perhaps it's due to Nintendo's extensive gaming history (especially when compared to Sony and Microsoft). Similarly, many of these Fanboys grew up with Nintendo, with the NES and SNES occasionally acting as a babysitter. For some, an attack on Nintendo is equal to or worse than an attack on one's family. To such individuals, I say take it easy. I'm certainly not above the label of "Nintendo Fanboy" (look at the name of this site for crying out loud), but I do try my best to apply sound reason and understanding to such hostility. I now present to you a look at 5 common weapons used in battle against Nintendo, an analysis of each argument, and how best a supporter of Nintendo should respond. NEXT >> #ninbutton { border-style: solid; border-color: #000; border-width: 2px; background-color: #BBB; color: #000; text-decoration: none; width: 100px; text-align: center; padding: 2px 2px 2px 2px; margin: 2px 2px 2px 2px; } .buttontext { color: #000; text-decoration: none; font: bold 14pt Helvetica; } #ninbutton:hover { text-decoration: none; color: #BBB; background-color: #000; } The Top 5 is a weekly feature that provides us with a forum to share our opinions on various aspects of the video game culture, and provides you with a forum to tell us how wrong we are. To further voice your opinions, submit a vote in the Wii Fanboy Poll, and take part in the daily discussions of Wii Warm Up.
Fanboy chatter weekly: May 15th - June 5th
A selection of some of the week's best posts from Joystiq's network of Fanboy blogs: [The] executive vice president of Opera for Devices, confirms that the Wii's web browser will come loaded on the system, though he thankfully never resorts to that Dreamcast-era phrase, "internet right out of the box." ... more» Kazuma Kujo, creator of R-Type, brought up a great point about cross-platform gaming. He believes that the stark contrast between the control scheme of such systems like the PS3 and the Wii "will discourage many developers from making games for multiple platforms." more» Satoru Iwata ... confirmed that the Wii will be able to interact with the DS in the form of downloadable demos through the WiiConnect 24 service. ... more» The latest firmware update has been released for the PSP, which is version 2.71 to be exact, and aside from its homebrew-killing powers, the update provides the following ... more» 1UP decided to ask Denis Dyack what they thought about the show and the feedback that they received. During the interview, Dyack guaranteed that gamers will not have an issue with the framerate [in Too Human] and that no such problems will arise like they did at E3. more»
Fanboy chatter weekly: May 17th - 24th
A selection of some of the week's best posts from Joystiq's network of Fanboy blogs: There's a list of Wii launch games traveling through the myriad computers, routers, cables and robotic gnomes that comprise the Internet, though it mostly amounts to a bunch of good guesses as opposed to official confirmations ... more» ... the PS3's online multiplayer will be available for free right out of the box. Now, as much as this blogger would love to believe this statement, no factual evidence is presented by the website other than an unnamed Sony Computer Entertainment America PR Manager ... more» Nintendo of Europe has announced that Nintendogs: Dalmatian and Friends will ship to canine-loving Europeans on June 16th for £30/40 Euros, just days before the DS Lite launch ... more» Those wonderful folk over at Shiny that put the little earthworm into a giant mechanized suit so many years ago are back at it again, bringing Jim to the PSP for an all new 2D adventure inspired by the first two games in the franchise ... more» ... seeing the cost of the 360 drop even more could potentially solidify the rest of the market for Microsoft come November. That's what a lot of people have been saying, at least. But Chris Lewis from Microsoft has said that such a drop won't take place ... more»
Fanboy chatter weekly: April 24th - May 3rd
A selection of some of the week's best posts from Joystiq's network of Fanboy blogs: ... directly tied to an interview Kojima had with Japanese gaming mag Famitsu where the man himself revealed he was working on a Revolution Wii title that would be a brand new IP and geared towards girls ... more» Sotaro Tojima (he's the sound guy for MGS4) wants to make you think you're in a movie studio when you hear his goods. That means a slew of environmental and situational audio backed by surround sound ... more» The mini-game centric title Baito Hell 2000, a game that had originally gotten some flak for looking like a knock-off of WarioWare but evolved into something far more demented, will get a name change when it hits the US this year ... more» ... the price for the Nintendo DS Animal Crossing Bundle has dropped twenty bucks and has become that much more attainable ... more» It looks like Uno for Xbox Live Arcade is the first game to have built in support for the yet-to-be-released Xbox 360 Camera ... more»
Fanboy chatter weekly: April 18th - 24th
A selection of some of the week's best posts from Joystiq's network of Fanboy blogs: ... Nintendo's own Shigeru Miyamoto announced that a new Donkey Kong title would be gracing the Revolution and it would be helmed by none other than the Jungle Beat team... more» The Indiana Jones universe will soon be played out in gaming glory with a new animation technology that is unprecedented. They're calling it euphoria, and it seeks to re-invent how you look at behavioral modeling... more» In a complicated process which no doubt involved dark alchemy and at least one blood sacrifice, a clever member of the homebrew community has managed to get the DS and the PSP talking to each other wirelessly... more» Namco Bandai revealed a veritable motherlode of details for their upcoming Ace Combat game for the PSP...the flight sim-ish game will feature wireless ad-hoc multiplayer hookups, an all-new storyline, strategic AI (your actions determine your objectives), and the ability to tune your own planes with parts unlocked during Campaign mode... more» Sal "The Man in the Orange Hat" Picataggio, loved the "banned" (for viral marketing hype purposes) subway gunfight commercial so much, he decided to recreate it on the University of Florida campus with a small army of his closest friends. Luckily Sal is founder of the UF Flash Mob... more»
Fanboy chatter weekly: April 9th - 18th
A selection of some of the week's best posts from Joystiq's network of Fanboy blogs: ... an upcoming issue of the Official Nintendo Magazine will divulge some info on Sega's upcoming Revolution games ... Another page seems to hint at a finalized date for the release of the Revolution of around the 27th of October ... more» Even if Sony decides to limit access to the PS3, this shouldn't be taken as a sign of them flaking out or stiffing anyone (they did promise it in playable form, after all). One thing is for sure: since we're this close to E3, having suspicious reports crop up like this is nothing short of expected ... more» Obviously, I want the game to use the capabilities of the DS whenever possible, but only if it comes naturally from the design and not as a forced bullet-point to add to the back of the game's case. ... more» Speculation of Gitaroo-Man making the trip to the PSP were confirmed yesterday when a listing on Sony Japan's retail site noted the rhythm-based title, called Gitaroo-Man Live!, would be released on the 25th of May ... more» Either way, if seeing the Xbox 360 connected through RF makes you sick in the mouth, then proceed with caution! However, if you're curious how hardcore some of your fellow fanboys are, continue reading and cast your vote for the most pathetic Xbox 360 setup! ... more»
Fanboy chatter weekly: April 3rd - 9th [update 1]
A selection of some of the best posts from Joystiq's network of Fanboy blogs: ... the Revolution will launch later this year with 20 games, a third of which will be Nintendo first-party titles ... more» Here's an off-screen video presentation of Lair recorded from GDC, showing off the Factor 5 game in action (or, should we say, motion) ... more» Next time, Miyamoto said, "I'll have to try and control myself when I transform into a 300 foot tall monster." ... more» ... this dongle device provides Internet connectivity to your PSP via your connected laptop or desktop computer when no wireless router is readily available ... more» Is your setup more pathetic than Mike's? Prove it ... If you win, you'll get the Turtle Beach Ear Force X2 headphones I reviewed this morning, so at least you'll have something right with your setup ... more» [Update 1: corrected a typo.]
Fanboy chatter (bi-)weekly: March 12th - 26th
A selection of some of the best posts from Joystiq's network of Fanboy blogs: In a move closely mirroring the hugely successful Sega Saturn launch, it is announced that the Miyamoto Device launches worldwide...today. It is mistakenly put in the kitchen appliance section by most major retailers. It's just as well, because... more» a wonderfully addictive celebration of neighborly etiquette and non-threatening anthropomorphism. Spot that description on the box of the forthcoming Animal Crossing Revolution, a title which series creator Katsuya Eguchi mentioned briefly at his own GDC speech last week... more» it comes as nice surprise that Namco is releasing a compilation of the entire Point Blank series on the DS. Apparently, tapping the screen with a stylus is similar to firing at it with a fake gun... more» Of course, we can't let this one slip by without tossing in some of our own pompous and potentially embarrassing predictions (Note: We also predict that our predictions won't be entirely accurate, so subscribe to them with caution.) more» The guide is pretty simple and essentially just documents specific screws and pry points that you'll have to watch out for. But seeing as not everyone is willing to try their hand at sticking sharp objects into their $250 gadgets without some direction, this guide is a pretty good place to start... more» Sony reveals five new PSP Value Packs, each we ascertain will be offered with one of five titles: Medievil, Pursuit Force, WRC, Wipeout Pure, and Ridge Racer. According to the wonky English translated version we copped, these packs look like they might go for 250 Euros, which is about 300 American... more» Thanks to deviously pioneering gamers like Xexter, Xbox 360 owners can get nostalgic while playing old-school favorites from the NES era right on their next-gen console... more» Then again, is it really fair to give a prize to the person with the "best" setup? Doesn't the mere fact these yups (or more likely their parents) own fancy TVs and color-coordinated leather massage chairs mean that they can afford their own games... more»
Fanboy chatter weekly: March 5th - 12th
A selection of some of the best posts from Joystiq's network of Fanboy blogs: Given how well the original title made use of the DS touch screen, it would seem almost painfully obvious that the franchise is a surgically precise fit for Nintendo's controller. Sometimes a denial is all we need to confirm our suspicions... more» Ambiguous promises? Check. Non-committal concepts? Check. No discernibly valuable information? Check. Why, that must mean we're once again dealing with a developer's comments on their upcoming Revolution games! more» The task is simple: If you spot a DS download station in your area, send us the location or, even better, a picture of the beast as it whirs discreetly in the used games section... more» As the above video suggests, Style Book comes complete with a scheduler, a diary, some sort of floppy-eared animal mascot and a cute DS carrying pouch. Being a Japanese teenage girl myself, I'm glad Nintendo and Bandai are appealing to my tough-to-crack market. Now if only they'd make a game that's all about hugging rainbow candyfloss unicorns... more» Despite the PSP's current hardware limitations, game developers have an obligation to their own craft to find ways to take advantage of the strengths that the portable offers, instead of always exclaiming their shoulda woulda couldas after their game hits a snag with gamers... more» But since we can’t speak Japanese, picking up the import version of Me & My Katamari is about as smart as buying a UMD movie at full price. It’s wonderful news then that Namco’s announced that the game has gone gold, which means it’ll soon be sent off to Sony’s super-secret proprietary disc-printing factories... more» With his boy band hair, delicate features and super geek success story, CliffyB is a hero to wannabe game designers and amateur gay porn stars everywhere. But how many vodka chasers do you have to swallow before mistaking this dude for Anna Kournikova? Oh God, check out the jaw line. It's freaky... more» Until accessory manufacturers realize that audio-adapters for the Xbox 360 controller are a booming market, we'll keep posting about all the hacked/cludged/jury-rigged options available to you... more»
Fanboy chatter weekly: February 26 - March 5
A selection of some of the best posts from the Joystiq Network of Fanboy blogs: Cars will be an adaption of Pixar's upcoming animated spectacular while Trauma Center graduates to the Revolution after finishing medical school on the Nintendo DS... more» The company apparently plans to release a motion-sensitive controller that would cooperate with the Eyetoy and thus turn the PS2 into a bastion for weird and unique games... more» A reader sent us this picture of a rather heavily priced DS Lite that he came across in the region of Akihabara. That price converts to about $360, or worse yet, a hefty 10,025 Russian Rubles... more» ...they've lifted the curtain on a fully functioning web browser, months before Nintendo releases their own Opera browser. This one's actually a specially compiled version of retawq, a text-based browser intended for Unix environments... more» Christened PlayStation.Spot, the service provides downloadable content like demos and other software via hotspots around 150 locations. It takes advantage of the "gameshare" function to get the content to your PSP without having to tap into a memory stick... more» After major upsets at both the Golden Globe Awards and the People's Choice Awards this year, all eyes are on the 2006 PSP Fanboy Redesign Awards. Who will win? Who will lose? more» Finally, some images of the enormous bus that will be touring New Zealand to promote the Xbox 360. Local gaming site, Gameplanet, got a first-hand look at the "largest bus ever seen in New Zealand" during Microsoft's media preview at Auckland's Viaduct Harbour... more» Will the Xbox 360 camera have tracking abilities similar to the Sony EyeToy and motion-sensitive Revolution controller? German blogger Erzengel360 dug up a recently updated Microsoft patent for "relative range camera calibration" that would seem to support the notion... more»
