goat simulator
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'Goat Simulator 3' is coming to PC, Xbox and PlayStation this fall
You can play a bunch of minigames with up to three of your buds or simply cause mayhem together.
'Uncharted: The Nathan Drake Collection' is free on PS Plus in January
Sony is giving the PS4 a proper send-off by making some of its most important games available to just about everyone... if they have PlayStation Plus subscriptions, that is. The company has announced that January's free PS Plus games will include Uncharted: The Nathan Drake Collection, giving you a chance to play the first three games in Drake's story (no multiplayer, alas) in remastered PS4 versions. Some games have aged more gracefully than others (the original feels like a prototype for what the others would become), but it's a good way to catch up -- or just to avoid digging your PS3 out of the closet.
GAME's festive shopping simulator is equal parts hilarious and awful
It's safe to say Goat Simulator has become a cherished part of video game culture. Now GAME is hoping to tap into some of that indie magic with a parody simulation title of its own. It's called Christmas Shopper Simulator and, well, it's a bit rubbish. The game dumps your rag-doll character in a generic British shopping centre, filled with pun-riddled shops such as "Scroungeland" and "Texas Raincoat Massacre." Sprint to the top floor and you'll even find an "Amazombie" store with the slogan "powered by a heartless algorithm." There are missions and barmy achievements to complete, but GAME knows you'll probably have more fun hurling presents at unsuspecting shoppers and generally running riot. That's why it's a free download for PC and Mac, meaning you can save your hard-earned cash for a proper video game this Christmas.
Goat MMO Simulator boasts one level more than World of Warcraft
Few moments in MMO history have been as pivotal and groundbreaking as what we are witness to today. For we, the humble gamers of the year 2014, are about to embark on an adventure that makes every online effort to date look like E.T. for the Atari 2600. As of later this week, Goat Simulator will become an MMO (simulator). The inexplicably bizarre sandbox hit is preparing to roll out a free DLC patch that will have one more level than that "other" MMO. With 101 levels, dozens of quests, five classes (including Microwave), and "factional warfare between goats and sheep," the newly christened Goat MMO Simulator will take the zany gameplay to the nth degree. Don't believe us? We have the video proof after the jump as well as 500 incredulous comments down below (commenters, please don't let us down on this after we vouched for you here).
The best farm animal simulator on Mac is turning into an MMO
Goat Simulator is one of the best games of the year -- no, seriously, you can waste a whole lot of time doing absolutely nothing as a goat -- and now it's getting a ridiculous update that is going to make it even more of a time-sink. This Thursday, the PC version of the game is getting a patch that will turn it into a multiplayer game, and not just a multiplayer game, but a multiplayer fantasy RPG. What a time to be alive! Previously, Goat Simulator's main draw was just how absurd it was to run around as a goat, beat up some unsuspecting humans, and maybe get run over by a car or three. It's not clear how much the new update will change that, but from the video teaser released by developer Coffee Stain Studios, it's clear that the absurdity is still very much alive and well. Unfortunately, game designer Armin Ibrisagic tells me that the company doesn't currently have plans to bring the MMO update to the iOS version of the game, though that could change somewhere down the line. If you're expecting anything resembling a traditional MMO experience here, you should probably revise your expectations a bit. There appears to be an XP system, and there are definitely character classes and a new Skyrim-esque setting, but don't expect it to give you a reason to cancel your World of Warcraft subscription.
Goat MMO Simulator will WoW fans for free later this week
If you're a MMO player LFG - Looking For Goats - then you're probably mad. You're also exactly the kind of oddball who'll be interested by Goat MMO Simulator, a free expansion for Goat Simulator that's releasing on Steam this Thursday, November 20. Note the placement of MMO in the title; as developer Coffee Stain Studios puts it, the patch delivers "MMO simulation so good you'll think it's real." Regardless, the DLC features five classes that include Warrior, Rouge (yes, Rouge) and Microwave (still yes, Microwave.) The level cap is 101, sheep and goat factions are at war, and there are mermaids. And, 'cos it's Goat Simulator, there's another great trailer to watch below the break.
Throw the couch, there's a Fly In The House
A new trailer for Fly In The House shows just why lone developer Mykhail Konokh calls it an "exploration and destruction" game that parodies Fullbright Company's own exploration game, Gone Home. In Fly In The House, you become obsessed with a nagging, buzzing insect's presence and take up arms against the nuisance. Much like Coffee Stain Studio's Goat Simulator, Konokh's game rewards players with points and ranks when they toss any item in the house they find at the fly, trashing the place they call home. While not officially on Steam Greenlight yet, Fly In The House's concept page notes that players will also "search hidden objects" and "reveal the mysteries" of the main character across varying game modes. Check out the trailer after the break. [Image: Mykhail Konokh]
Goat Simulator gets 100,000 sales on iOS, Android
Coffee Stain Studios has sold more than 100,000 copies of Goat Simulator across Android and iOS, after launching on those platforms five days ago. That's not baaah-d. Sorry, we really rammed that joke in there, didn't we? We kid, we kid. "It feels really amazing that so many people like our game!" designer Armin Ibrisagic writes on the Coffee Stain blog. "We're also really happy that we can now reach out to even more goat fans, and that people without a computer can now also enjoy the life of being a goat!" In terms of updates, Coffee Stain is currently focused on squashing any crash bugs on mobile. The studio is aware of the issues on Android devices listed here. "While we realize you might be super curious of our future plans, the truth is actually that we don't plan much ahead at all [....] But after a couple of weeks we'll see how it goes! Hopefully we'll be able to give you more information then." Goat Simulator hit "almost 1 million" sales in August, and Coffee Stain recouped the game's development costs within ten minutes of launch on Steam (on April 1, of course). [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Goat Simulator crash lands on iOS
Goat Simulator - the surprise PC hit that was spawned by a single YouTube video - gave rise to a massive number of clones both on iOS and other platforms. Some are good, some are not so good, but now the one true king of barnyard antics is finally available on iPhone and iPad, and it proves quite handily that its copycats simply aren't as great as the genuine article. If you've never played Goat Simulator on PC, let me give you a quick rundown of what it's all about: You play as a goat. There, that's it. Ok, so there's objects in the game world to destroy, items to pick up and drag with your tongue, and a basic points system that revolves around stringing together your actions in quick succession, but the fact that you play as a goat is really all you need to know about it. The game is an open world sandbox and you can travel to basically anywhere you can see, though most of the fun stuff is located in a concentrated area comprised of homes, businesses, factories, and a construction site. With no objectives or missions of any kind, the game never really ends, and there are enough random secrets hidden around the world that it can keep you busy for far longer than you might imagine. On the iPhone 5s and iPad mini w/Retina, the game runs flawlessly and with an extremely smooth framerate. The game's description notes that anyone with a device older than the iPhone 4s or iPad 2 shouldn't try to play it, so don't waste your money if you have a particularly old iDevice. The developer of Goat Simulator describe their creation as "a completely stupid game and, to be honest, you should probably spend your money on something else." In a way they're completely right; Goat Simulator is a horribly stupid idea... but that's also what makes it worth playing. It's charming, funny, and has more personality that most games that try desperately to be taken seriously. At US$4.99, it's the full Goat Simulator experience for a much lower price than you'll find on PC, so don't hesitate to pick it up.
Goat Simulator gives us the billies on iOS, Android
Goat Simulator puts the dumb into smartphones starting today, and it's available to purchase on iOS and Android now. The ports of Coffee Stain Studios' ridiculous phenomenon are priced $5, and the studio proudly proclaims they include "all the bugs from the PC version." Goat Simulator can be boiled down to causing as much physical destruction as possible with a goat... or other animals which Coffee Stain claims are goats too. The Sanctum dev admits it's a "completely stupid game" with "millions of bugs," but it's also a game with almost one million sales, largely thanks to an inspired marketing campaign that riffed on Dead Island's own viral trailer. The buck doesn't stop with the mobile ports, because Goat Simulator is also flying onto Xbox One, courtesy of LittleBigPlanet Vita co-developer Double Eleven. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Smaller games 'great candidates' for Xbox Games with Gold
Above: Goat Simulator, coming to Xbox One When mind-bender Braid came to Xbox Live Arcade in 2008, it felt emblematic of a curated platform: a boutique in which unique concepts and independent developers could gain exposure. Now the boutique is long gone and independent games are plentiful, mingling with AAA games right there in the living room, for better or worse. Games like the time-stopping shooter, Super Hot, are now regularly shown beneath lit-up Xbox and PlayStation logos at major press briefings, though they're not typically explored in depth. Instead, the presentation format seems to be cramming every confirmed game into a montage and shotgunning them into the audience. In the years since Braid, independent creations have gone from oddities to commodities, and they're "coming to our console first" – that's how the line goes.
Goat Simulator, Valiant Hearts both headed to iOS
We've seen so many games make their way from iOS to home consoles and PC, it's about time our iPads and iPhones started to suck in titles from elsewhere, and that's just what they're doing. Both the hilariously offbeat Goat Simulator and the tear-jerking war story Valiant Hearts are headed to an iOS device near you. Valiant Hearts is a 2D puzzle game that tells a very gritty, emotional story of a soldier's journey during World War I. The game was launched on home consoles as well as PC for $15, but the game is reportedly being completely reworked to fit the control scheme of iOS. Goat Simulator originally gained attention as a joke from developer Coffee Stain Studios. The "game" was originally built to test the team's physics engine, but after a video of the hilarious concept went viral the company decided to build it into a full game. Both titles have been fan favorites this year, so it's no surprise their respective developers have seen iOS as a fantastic way to grow their audiences. Valiant Hearts is slated to hit the App Store on September 4, while Goat Simulator has yet to receive a launch date for its iOS release.
An influx of Xbox One indies: Superhot, Goat Simulator [UPDATE: Many trailers added!]
Microsoft's indie development initiative, ID@Xbox, is bringing in a bunch of games to launch first on console on Xbox One, including Superhot, Goat Simulator, Dungeon of the Endless, No Time to Explain and Smite. Peek the full list of games ID@Xbox head Chris Charla announced during the Xbox Gamescom press conference below:
Goat Simulator makes big bucks with 'almost 1 million' sales
Of all the many "simulator" games, Goat Simulator stands out as one of the silliest and craziest to catch heat. That's reflected by the game's sales to date of "almost 1 million," as announced by Coffee Stain Studio's Armin Ibrisagic at GDC Europe this morning. It's no surprise, then, that the studio's now working on bringing the game to iOS and Android. To ram those figures home, Ibrisagic said Coffee Stain made back the money it invested into Goat Simulator in "ten minutes." Perhaps crazier, the game generated more revenue in four months than the studio had made in the previous four years. Goat Simulator represents a surreal and unexpected success for the Sanctum studio, which, as Ibrisagic explained, approached the game as no more than a light-hearted change of pace after working on a far more serious tower-defense series for years. The moment Coffee Stain realized it had to make Goat Simulator into a real game was when its debut trailer racked up a million views. The studio diverted all employees to working on it and rapidly started adding content to it ahead of its - no kidding - April 1 release. That extra content included a giraffe - after all, according to Ibrisagic, all animals are goats. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Deep Silver unleashes Goat Simulator in NA stores this July
Goat Simulator has been available as a Steam download since April 1, but this is a physical game about physical things getting physically wrecked by a very physical goat; doesn't it deserve a physical release? Deep Silver thinks so, which is why it's acquired North American distribution rights from developer Coffee Stain Studios. You'll be able to pick up a boxed copy of the game at participating retail stores starting in mid-July. Thankfully, while goats are known to eat just about anything, this even-toed ungulate will go easy on your cash. The boxed copy - like its Steam counterpart - will cost $9.99. Of course, the goat-in-a-game-shop news might sound familiar to those living across the pond; it's been available in UK stores since May. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Non-violent platformer A Story About My Uncle debuts on Steam
Just when you thought Coffee Stain Studios was only capable of delivering games focused on rude livestock, the Goat Simulator publisher takes things in an entirely different direction with Gone North Games' thoughtful, gorgeous A Story About My Uncle. The game, which has just appeared on Steam, tells the tale of a young man searching for his uncle inside a fantastical realm full of vibrant colors and otherworldly structures. Instead of simply wandering through the place, our protagonist comes across a handy device best imagined as an energy-based grappling hook with which he can swing from platform to platform. While not a wholly original idea, once you're acquainted with the in-game physics of A Story About My Uncle, the freedom of motion it offers completely overshadows the game's notably contrarian lack of blood and guts. Those interested in A Story About My Uncle can find the game on Steam at a price of $13 - unless you act quickly. From now until June 4, A Story About My Uncle features a 10 percent discount, reducing its price to $11.69. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Goat Simulator sees Minecraft makeover in 1.1 patch
Among the additions coming to Goat Simulator in its imminent 1.1 patch is a new aesthetic option modeled after the Cubist paradise that is Minecraft. Having noticed our borderline-obsessive fixation on Goat Simulator, designer Armin Ibrisagic sent over the handful of screenshots found in the below gallery. "Now you'll be able to play the world's most popular game inside the world's best game," Ibrisagic said, offering no further explanation. As we mentioned, the 1.1 patch is now slated to hit Goat Simulator on June 3. Alongside this new Minecraft-style aesthetic option, it will bring with it splitscreen multiplayer, goat parkour and a handful of new goats. We still have no idea what the "Shopping Goat" might be, though we expect more information once the patch debuts. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Goat Simulator 1.1 headbutts your PC on June 3
Old dogs may be a lost cause, but old goats can definitely be taught new tricks - for proof, look no further than the 1.1 update now slated to reach Goat Simulator on June 3. Though originally scheduled to launch in May, developer Coffee Stain Studios opted to delay the release of the 1.1 patch to ensure that players would receive only the finest in barnyard shenanigans. "We realise we said we'd release the patch in May, but we really wanted to shock players and make sure the new map will be even better than the old one, so we had to push forth the release date a week or so than we originally intended," said designer Armin Ibrisagic. "With June 3rd as a release date, the new map is gonna be so awesome, and I'm not just saying that cause I'm working on the game." Alongside the new map (which Coffee Stain Studios claims is "roughly the size of the old map") the free 1.1 update also brings with it splitscreen multiplayer for up to four would-be goats, goat parkour and goats that have inexplicably learned to ride both bicycles and skateboards. New breeds of goat are also found in the update, including the Tornado Goat, Classy Goat and Shopping Goat. What's a "Shopping Goat?" We've got no idea. Just roll with it, and hope June 3 brings some sort of explanation. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Goat Simulator to rampage across the UK in boxed release
The only thing more fun than a barrel full of monkeys is a box full of goats, and that's exactly what Coffee Stain Studios has planned for the citizens of the UK. Koch Media, Goat Simulator's UK publisher, broke the news this morning, saying that the physical version of the Internet's favorite antisocial livestock simulator will reach retailers on May 23. No additional content is planned for the physical release, but buyers will receive a box emblazoned with the face of Satan's most cuddly terrestrial envoy. Notably lacking from the announcement was any word on what price point might be attached to the physical release. In addition to word of this physical version of Goat Simulator, developer Coffee Stain Studios has detailed the game's upcoming 1.1 patch with a video that is sadly exclusive to Facebook. The highlight, both of this clip and likely of your day, is goat parkour. If those two words didn't immediately send you scrambling for the "Play" button, you're probably dead. Joystiq offers its condolences. [Image: Coffee Stain Studios]
Play It On A Mac: Goat Simulator
In this weekly series I'll show you how to get your favorite Windows-exclusive PC games running on OS X. For more information on the programs used, check out the Play It On A Mac explainer. For suggestions and/or questions about any game, feel free to contact me on Twitter. If you aren't excited for Goat Simulator, there's something wrong with you. The physics-experiment-turned-viral-hit was recently released on Steam to much acclaim and many laughs. It was a game that, as its developer admits, was never even meant to be a game, but that doesn't mean it's not a blast to play. A Mac version is in the works, but there's no release date and you're probably tired of waiting, so here are your options for getting the barnyard animal simulator up and running on your trusty Mac. CrossOver Unfortunately, Goat Simulator is not officially or unofficially support on CrossOver. It has a status of "Known To Not Work" on the CrossOver compatibility list, with no ETA on a fix. It looks like we'll have to go an alternate route. Parallels After a quick Steam download and the usual first-time installation hiccups and almost-freezes, the game boots up just fine in Parallels 9. Despite being very simple in its approach, the game is pretty graphically demanding on the higher settings, so turn off things like dynamic shadows, light shafts, and motion blur, and turn the anti-aliasing off as well (it doesn't make a big difference anyway). At full 1080p resolution I was able to get between 25 and 40 frames per second constantly, even as I destroyed cars and sent pedestrians running for the hills. If you're willing to cut down your resolution a bit, this gets better, but it's certainly playable at 30fps given the sandbox style gameplay. When it comes to Parallels settings, I found that devoting between 50% and 60% of my available resources to the virtual machine produced the best results. Lower than that and the game suffers, but nothing over 60% provided a noticeable return. Parallels 9 settings: CPUs: 4 (out of 8) Memory: 8GB (out of 16GB) Video memory: 1GB Performance: Faster Virtual Machine Power: Better Performance Depending on your machine specs, this will differ, but this is a great starting point. Boot Camp Believe it or not, there's virtually zero benefit when booting directly into Windows this time around. I got the same 25fps to 40fps either way, and although the game seemed to load faster in between menus, the actual in-game performance was virtually identical. You might prefer Boot Camp if you'd rather not mess with micromanaging your virtual machine settings in Parallels, but there's no real benefit. Verdict Get amped, barnyard brawlers, because Goat Simulator is 100% A-OK in both Parallels and Boot Camp! Even on my decidedly underpowered Mac, the game is a ton of fun, and you should have no problem getting the game up and running on anything with similar (or better) specs. I noticed virtually zero difference between Parallels and Boot Camp this time around, so either one should suit you well.
