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This year's fashionable Wii injury: Wii knee
'Tis the season when people buy a lot of Wiis, which can mean only one thing: a 29,392% increase in ridiculous Wii scare stories from British newspapers. Over the last few days, in a bid to squeeze a story from thin air, at least two UK publications featured articles about how playing on a Wii can cause physical damage to users; you know, in the same way that any physical motion whatsoever could conceivably hurt somebody, somewhere. The Daily Telegraph was first off the mark over the weekend, describing how brilliant young doctors at Leeds Teaching Hospital have "discovered" what they call "Wii knee." Alas, this exciting development for medical science isn't actually mentioned beyond its name, because all of a sudden the newspaper is too busy getting a scary quote from a hand doctor (eh?). Not to be outdone, The Sun followed up today with its own piss-poor take on the WII IZ THE END TIMES angle, pointing out that ten Brits are hospitalized through Wii injuries each week. It then wheels out that 2007 favorite, "Wii-itis"/"Wii-itus" (choose your own spelling -- The Sun couldn't), before also referring to Wii knee, all while I weep for my once-proud nation. Source: The Telegraph kicks things off ...Source: ... and The Sun follows.
Wii blamed for ridiculous increase in British hospital visits
Nintendo's Wii has been maiming careless gamers since the day it was launched, but an inexplicable uptick in Britain has professionals scratching their heads. According to Dr. Dev Mukerjee of Broomfield Hospital: "There has been a 100 percent increase in patients complaining of Wii-itis." Turns out, Wii-itis is their word for playing so much Wii that you injure yourself. Astonishingly, up to ten people per week are being "hospitalized with injuries caused by playing Nintendo Wii games," which has forced medical personnel to "issue warnings of the dangers associated with the video game system." Some of the most common injuries are Wii-knee (seriously) and tendon stretching / tearing, both of which could likely be avoided if gamers would bother to stretch before breaking a sweat. Sheesh -- what do folks even learn in Physical Education these days?
Wiiitis captured, explained by MRI
As gamers, there aren't that many times that we can try to cop a macho attitude and tell a cohort to tough it out. Maybe at a chilly overnight console launch and (in some extreme cases) after a DDR tournament. But chief on that list is injuries sustained from Wiimotes. ... Oh, not you, sweetheart, we totally believe you. We're talking about ... Wiiitis.Now, much to our chagrin, it seems the affliction has actually been documented by MRI in the May issue of the journal Skeletal Radiology. Apparently, the problem is "awkward deceleration forces," which sounds plausible enough to us, considering our entire medical knowledge comes from Trauma Center. And now, Joystiq's Putting It All In Perspective Theater:Ethiopian: Excuse me America, could you please spare more of your medical technology to help our country?America: Gee, I'd love to Afeworki, but we've got some serious health problems over here we have to deal with first.Ethiopian: What do you mean? We're dying!America: Well, I don't expect your primitive brain to understand, but sometimes we play video games so hard that it requires immediate medical attention.Ethiopian: [Dies.]
Sacre bleu! French soccer team banned from Wii
French national football soccer team coach Raymond Domenech is a strange one. A keen astrologer who shies from picking Scorpios for his squad (apparently, he "doesn't trust them"), Domenech has now banned his players from playing on the Wii. We like to think that Raymond is a regular Wii Fanboy reader, and has read up on previous Wii-related injuries! We're probably being overly hopeful.Anyway, the French side is due to take part in the European Championships this summer (read: a big deal), so clearly Domenech wants to give his team every possible edge. Rubbish old England failed to qualify, of course, so they're welcome to play all the Wii they want. Silver linings and all that, eh chaps?[Via Go Nintendo]
Pro darts player blames poor performance on Wii
It's been a rollercoaster few days for professional darts player James Wade. In the kind of Wii-related story the mainstream press totally laps up, Wade got a Wii from Santa, and spent Christmas Day throwing haymakers and uppercuts in the boxing game that comes with Wii Sports. All of which was great fun, we imagine, if not exactly the perfect build-up for a PDC World Darts Championship match the very next day. Fortunately, Wade eked out a narrow victory, though confessed that he had lacked "his usual suppleness," and put it down to his encounter with Wii boxing.In its report, the Telegraph describes the Wii-induced injury as a "worrying first," though they clearly haven't heard about Wii elbow, or the one about the baseball player and Guitar Hero. The message is clear then, kids: do your stretches![Via Codename Revolution]
The Wii elbow returns
In a ridiculous labeling of a "medical condition," not to mention the ridiculous nature of placing an unnecessary amount of vowels next to each other in one lone word, Reuters is reporting that "Wiiitis" hath returned. At least, according to Dr. Julio Bonis who, upon waking one recent Sunday morning, found he had a sore shoulder. Thinking back upon his recent activity, Bonis could only isolate one thing in his life that he had spent numerous hours doing: Wiiing playing with his Nintendo Wii."What convinced me to send the case report was that a friend of mine, after playing 'Wii Sports' suffered from a similar complaint," Bonis explained. Although they are little to no documented cases (really?!), Bonis still thinks it's something affecting those who've been playing the console quite a bit. "I have not found other cases in my clinical practice, but it is probably an underdiagnosed condition." Well, we probably wouldn't agree, Doc.But, what about you readers?
Retractable Wii Sports Cuff enables flinging action
We shouldn't have to remind you just how hazardous free-hanging Wiimotes can be to the health and safety of those around you, but if you or your loved ones have suffered from an unfortunate Wiinjury, a solution has finally arrived. For those of you with the stronger, beefier Wiimote straps, keeping the controller gripped around your wrist can indeed become boring, which is where the Retractable Wii Sports Cuff enters to inject a bit of remote slinging excitement into the equation. The wrist-worn cuff allows your attached Wiimote to be flung "up to 13-inches," and it automatically brings it back to safety before (literally) getting too out of hand. The neoprene cuff looks to be a one size fits all edition, and while we've no idea if you can hack this bad boy to add a bit more length (you know, for real life Wii Rodeos), you can snap up the original right now for just $5.99.[Via GearLog]
Unpacking the Wii replacement straps
After ordering for new Wiimote strap the day Nintendo announced its replacement program, our sister site Engadget finally got a little manila envelope that is sure to safeguard their television screens. Those who also ordered straps shortly after the program was announced should have them shortly (or may already have them).If your Nintendo love, or love for unpacking, runs deep, then we recommend you check out Engadget's gallery for the unpacking and side-by-side comparisons between the old straps and the new, beefier upgrades. For more on the Wii injuries situation, we suggest you hit up CNN's video report.
Wii rocks an empty movie theater, we become jealous
What do you do when you need more screen size than available (or perhaps destroyed your TV)? Well, you can do like these guys do and head on down to an empty theater and hook your Wii up there! Look at the size of those Miis, they're huge!As always, video is embedded into the post past the jump.
Wii-related injury roundup
It didn't take too long for the first Wii-related injury to surface, and it was even shorter before Wiimotes folks starting breaking things with their wild flinging antics, but when your product spurns the creation of an entire website devoted to users getting banged up when misusing the controller, now that's an accomplishment. Of course, it's probably safe to assume that at least half these Wiinjuries are nothing more than backyard boo-boos that folks translated into Wiincidents to get their 15 minutes of fame, but regardless, when Nintendo sends out emails and offers beefier Wiimote straps to those having problems, at least some of this stuff has to be legitimate. First up is a high-heel-wearing dame who apparently dislocated her knee while going for the smash in Wii Tennis, but the remedy to this happening again should really be quite apparent. Next we've got a rowdy customer service guru who actually swung the Wii-bat so hard, it purportedly snapped something within his arm. Lastly, we've got a Agassi wannabe who didn't exactly pay attention to the overhead (glass) light fixture before serving an ace, and now he's reportedly got the bloodshed (and repair bills) to show for it. The moral of the story is that the Wiimote can be a potent weapon and injury liaison if not used properly, but hey, we can't deny the humor in folks taking themselves out when going FTW.Read - Dislocated Knee, via JoystiqRead - Broken ArmRead - Sliced HandRead - More Examples of Wiimote carelessness
AP: Wii 'gamers gone wild'
CNN posts an AP story about Wii "gamers gone wild" -- no, not the good kind of wild going -- hyping the Wii accident-buzz in the mainstream media. The article is light in tone and suggests that the injury murmurs on the internet may be generating positive Wii press despite the occasional, horribly sickening knee injury. Our favorite part of the story is the bullet point header for those with short attention spans. The first point, "Controllers go flying, sometimes poke holes in TVs," gets a gold star for mixing casual writing with a sensational subject.
Fake wiinjuries: they're all the rage
The Wii is quickly becoming the deadliest console ever made, with Wii controllers dramatically detaching from wrists and hurtling straight into the nearest television, priceless vase or unprotected grandmother. Other times, the wiimote inflicts massive damage without even leaving the hand, swung wildly through the air with little regards to a friend's head which occupies the same space. Joystiq reader, Anders Akk, today sent us yet another harrowing story of flailing siblings and unexpected clobberings:hey guys, recently got my nintendo wii and have had a really, really bad experience with it. i was playing wii sports boxing with my brother and we were playing in a pretty small room. the idiot go so into the action and tried to side swipe my character when his nunchuk hit me in my right eye. i have an absolutely massive bloody black eye and can hardly even open it. to top it off, about 5 minutes later he was playing on his own when the wii remote shot out of his hand and hit the tv. its only a cheap crt, but he's put a dark patch in it from the impact. anyway, thought i may as well let others get a kick out of my mishaps... Paired with his photographic evidence, the tale truly is a dreadful one. Dreadful and entirely untrue. Here's the story Anders should have told us:
Wiimote launches through window, insurance coverage questionable
While we initially felt Wal-Mart was being a bit old fashioned by not allowing Wii demo kiosks to be setup in stores due to "safety concerns," Walton and friends apparently had a good bit of foresight that we weren't aware of. After numerous reports of television sets getting the axe, and an innocently bystanding HP iPAQ getting all cracked up, we're wondering if folks aren't just staging their own Wiincidents at this point. Apparently warning everyone of how jeopardous these free-flying Wiimotes can be wasn't really taken to heart, as now a butterfingered gamer has quite an interesting tale to tell to the presumably skeptical insurance adjuster. While busting a few moves in Wii Sports, the nonsensical user let the controller fly, but instead of landing softly (and harmlessly) on the couch, it rocketed straight through his window, leaving a fairly dangerous scene as proof of gaming negligence. C'mon folks, we've warned you all enough by now, either strap on that thoughtfully included wrist strap, grab some sticky gloves, or tape up the windows -- your property, your call.[Thanks, Sean]
It's all fun and games ....
While incautious use of the Wiimote will (probably) not result in death, there are apparently some risks involved with the components of your new console. Nintendo's manuals are chock full of warnings, and in fact, a screen reminding players to be sure and employ the wrist strap pops up with annoying frequency. But what about those situations that aren't covered in the manual? You may not shoot your eye out playing Red Steel, but we keep waiting for the first stories of flying Wiimotes clocking people in the head. Worried about all the possible heinous outcomes? 1UP prepared a handy visual guide to possible "Wiinjuries" both physical and psychological. Who knew that Wii caused cancer? According to the above photo, it just might ....Check after the jump for more personal story.
Nintendo's Wiimote: innovative controller, or potent weapon?
While there's always the chance you'll be bludgeoned or shot up while holding down the fort for your chance to snag a Playstation 3, those who take the (presumably) easier route and grab a Nintendo Wii may be buying an accident waiting to happen. Those oh-so-cautious execs over at Wally World have already passed on their chance to install Wii demo kiosks due to "safety concerns," and even those testing it out in GameStop will be keenly watched. In preparation for Wiiday, 1UP has sacrificed some of its own men and women to ensure that all that pent-up excitement (not to mention the effects of sleep deprivation) doesn't lead to a Wiinjury. Although the big N fully expects everyone grasping a Wiimote to buckle up (to their wrist) first, we all know that's not likely to happen -- so you should probably take precautions to avoid getting butterfingers, tennis elbow, entangled, strangled, cancer (saywha?), and a whole host of other potential wounds. While you're brushing up on those Wii reviews, make sure you hit the read link to see just how dangerous that cutesy controller can be.[Via digg]
