iTunes music library flirting

The scene is both postmodern and Reineresque: young man with PowerBook in coffee shop discovers amazing music collection shared via iTunes.  He hopes to God it belongs to the raven-haired hotty in the corner.  He proceeds to share a library of his own, no songs, but simply titled, "Maria, I sweat your music collection."  She takes note, creates a library called "try_the_new_dalek".  And so began a library-name-only flirting session that will no-doubt make Mac haters seethe and AppleHeadz swoon.  Either way, it's a way to pass the time between scones and textbook chapters on a lonely Tuesday eve.  Try it before it becomes some new, creepy form of cyberstalking.

[Via Waxy.org]

["Mac haters" @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

People don't hate Macs, they hate Apple zealots.

[Kenny @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

hm

the need for the powerbook suddenly went from 90% sure ...to 95% sure.

[Whiplash @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

Kind of pathetic I think.

[Aaron @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

What is most interesting though, is that Rendezvous is completely below the radar for these iTunes library flirters

[Monmin @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

What a couple of geeks.

He thought he was talking to the girl, it was really the big fat guy sitting behind him who also thought he was talking to the girl. hahahahaha

[hocake @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

these are neither geeks nor mac zealots. either one wouldve first made an album named "turn on iChat"

these are pc drones who've haplessly wandered to close to the RDF and pulled out their plastic.

duh!

[Bigland @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

What does this have to do with Mac?

iTunes runs on PC too!

[Dean Shan @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

My roommate is a huge fan of library sharing. It really ticks him off when someone shares their library and then locks it. He would always change his library name to 'Unlock your music NOW!'. People would usually respond by quitting iTunes.

[010111 @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

wait... theres a new dalek? when did that come out!?

[Ken @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

Yeah, The Who's been off the air for years. (slaps knee)

[Frank @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

Sounds about as plausible as Bluejacking to me. Or whatever the hell that stupid post was about 6 months ago where people in the UK were supposedly having "sexual rendezvous" by randomly messaging other bluetooth phone users.

[Jeff @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

"Sounds about as plausible as Bluejacking to me. Or whatever the hell that stupid post was about 6 months ago where people in the UK were supposedly having "sexual rendezvous" by randomly messaging other bluetooth phone users."

Or that made-up Wired article about people podjacking in New York - sticking their headphones into somebody else's iPod. Wired said it was a great way to meet people. Those of us who actually live here in NY know that it's a better way to get yourself killed.

[thornrag @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

"these are neither geeks nor mac zealots. either one wouldve first made an album named "turn on iChat"

RTFA. He got cold dissed.

[Monmin @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

"RTFA. He got cold dissed."

So, hitting on a chick through the itunes interface is not a good way to meet women? That guy who's now 95% sure to buy a powerbook (#2) is gonna be sooo dissapointed. I'm 100% sure he's gonna get dissed too.

"yo, baby I'm sweating on your itunes, maybe me and you can rendezvous if you know what I mean?"

[Sam McConnell @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

That sounds like me a couple of months ago. It happened to me, it can happen to you!

[Jack @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

You might be pathetic if, you say "turn on iChat" to someone who is physically sitting in the same room with you.

[Carmi @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

Like it or not, lifestyle-type scenarios like this create demand for product. Apple has capitalized on this more effectively than most vendors. It matters little whether you are a Mac zealot or not, but you've got to give Steve Jobs & Co. credit for a branding strategy that few other companies can even approach.

Carmi
http://writteninc.blogspot.com

[of_the_apes @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

Listen, if you need to do something like this to meet people, let alone get laid, you're going about it all wrong. In a way, I'm not surprised at all since people seem to grow more pathetic with each passing year.

All I see is passivity on the part of both players, and passivitiy never builds anything of consequence or duration. It shows a complete lack of self-confidence and no understanding of why two people should begin the "orbit" of investigating what the other has to offer and how that ultimately needs to work.

There are plenty of people that share my musical tastes(as bizarre as they may be) and own a powerbook(as i do) - that doesn't mean I want to let them into my life without witnessing first hand how they act and the deeper issues that are far more important to a friendship working. Give me something more to work with please!

How is one to judge if the other person is a friggin' pyscho - my first assumption would be that if they decide this is a good method to use, they are not pyschologically sound or lack the self-confidence for anything further to develop. Nobody sane wants that bullshit, regardless of what the short term payoff is.

I've dated more than my fair share of psychos and if there's anything I would change about the past, it would have been to screen people more thoroughly somehow. Force them to reveal more than a cursory glance can give you. I've found most people tend to play their cards close to their heart, trying to provide what they THINK the other person wants and inevitably hide who they really are deep down, so anything that can reveal deeper issues is a plus. This also applies to platonic relationships as well, some people aren't worth the headache. In a way, this scenario could be used as a screening system since I would immediately dismiss the approach as desperate and cowardly. I guess then I would know to keep my distance, but I prefer to filter more positively and actively instead of seeing negative examples.

What ever happened to face to face conversation and showing yourself more openly? Rejection doesn't kill, it makes you stronger and more aware. Being open shouldn't be scary since in the end, it's who you are and if you can't be yourself you're not in the right situation.

This scenario is either a complete fabrication, or the two parties involved are scary weird(and maybe deserve each other). But if you think this is going to win anyone over that's normal, stable and that it will last, you'll probably be sadly and shockingly proven wrong.

Since this is just so weird, akin to randomly IMing someone you don't know, I don't think that Apple is actively looking to capitalize on this kind of thing anymore than CERN sought to capitalize on web porn way back in the infancy of the web. If they are, frankly I'm scared.

[Awesom-o @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

Mr. of_the_apes, I completely agree, but I don't see this as being used by people who want to use it because they don't have to balls to actually talk to someone. This could be an OPENING into a real conversation. I honestly doubt this will ever happen to me, but some people may "flirt" a little initially, in a coffee shop using this iTunes library thing, and then, find out who the other person is, and actually get up and go over and talk to them.

I know you don't need an "in" to talk to someone, but many people want one. If this provides that "in", and it actually happened to someone, it could easily spawn something more.

Of course rejection doesn't kill you, and I'm glad people still have the balls to talk to other people. It's the only way I know how to do it, but this iTunes thing isn't all bad.

When I meet someone face to face, we often talk about music anyway, so this is just another way to get into that.

I'm just saying, at least this is POSSIBLE, and doesn't have to be weird, and the people don't have to be psychos.

[of_the_apes @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

awesome-o,
that may be true about it being an "opening" but doing it the "normal" way would be much easier and more appealing to the average person. I mean, if a person wants to flirt, or is looking for something, it's usually pretty apparent. Sitting by passively and "hoping" someone notices a share is pretty lame and likely to attract people who are equally passive and equally lame. As i said before, being passive won't get you anywhere for long, or where you'd like to end up - you end up with people who don't have an interest in facing challenges and moving on to the next(actually flirting the normal way is taking a risk, putting yourself out there with no promise of actual success). From personal experience I'd say that if someone isn't actively pursuing something and chooses to wait for something to passively to land in their lap, they aren't confident enough to make anything last, trust the other person, etc. That's something I have no interest in pursuing ever again. Grow some balls/ovaries for christ sake and be an active participant in life. I DO think this is something that someone who doesn't have the balls to go about it the tried and true route would use - people like that lack confidence and won't even attempt something unless they're guaranteed some level of success. To me at least, putting yourself out there and ego on the line is a hell of a lot more attractive than going for the sure bet. Anyone can get a strike when alley is set up for bumper bowling...it's hardly impressive.

It IS weird, because it's not showing initiative(actively) or the ability to read other people at all. I see this as fishing with a net - you're bound to catch all sorts of unwanted species when you yank in the line. I prefer a spear to use such a horrible analogy, but at least you have a better idea of what you're actually targeting. It shows you'd rather sit with your headphones on ignoring the world around until someone near you makes a sudden sound, when really you should be paying attention at all times(if you're playing the game)

I think the ability to read people is something that's very important and often overlooked. It comes from having emotional maturity which is extremely important. It shows you understand interactions of this type and usually how and when to react. It also shows you probably understand that your actions and inactions have consequences be they positive or negative.

Maybe I'm just being overly critical and harsh of people who are shy, but really there's no justifiable reason to be shy in the first place when being open and active doesn't cost a thing and won't kill you in the end. People really aren't as horrible as we sometimes make them out to be.

And yeah, usually musical taste comes up in conversation - but this method can hardly be considered "conversation" on anything but the weakest level.

[Payton Chung @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

hey, of_the_apes, you ARE being too critical and harsh. enabling iTunes sharing within my office has opened up the lines of communication a bit, without any sort of weird stalking going on. I'm not sure whether I would have brought up music before, but I can now talk about emo bands or Schumann or Nat King Cole with my coworkers. I imagine that it might work the same way in "third places" around my hipster (read: music savvy) neighborhood.
- pc

[of_the_apes @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

Payton

You must work with socially inept weirdos. It sounds like the kind of office where people fit into the category of either 1)non-bathers or 2)potential serial killers. Seriously! How difficult is it to strike up a conversation about something as simple as music?? It's a pretty innocent topic and not likely to offend anyone unless you insist on reciting 2Live Crew lyrics because you think they're the Ultimate Rap Group EVAH.

Let's examine - you probably have lunch with a few of your coworkers, or need to grab a cup of coffee every few hours, you may need to even wait for people to show up for meetings in a conference room. Prime opportunities to have all sorts of conversations on subjects as far reaching as the weather or GASP even music.

It's not really anymore complex than opening your mouth and blurting it out...to over simplify. "Hey, I've been listening to....BLAH BLAH BLAH...you should check it out." Considering how many people work with headphones on, conversations about music are a no brainer.

However, if you truly need a conversation starter for your fellow employees, people you should be able to easily communicate with to begin because the survival of a company depends on communication, I would suggest the whole office seek group therapy.

If you were trying to prove that I'm being overly harsh and critical, you may want to use a less ridiculous example of how iTunes sharing has changed your life.

As an aside...your hipster neighbors will probably be too cool to listen to anything anyone has to say about music, even you with your best intentions - that's why they're "hipsters". They know all, and don't need schooling, opinions or discussion, especially if it could run counter to what they believe. So sharing iTunes will probably not result in anything but music being swiped from your HD when they think nobody is looking. They may have wanted the latest "Tegan and Sara" album, they just don't want to admit it or chit-chat about it afterwards - you might be a Camera Obscura fan.

[Maria @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

So I was in this coffee shop the other day with my Powerbook when suddenly I noticed someone was stealing my music. I looked around and noticed this fat nerdy guy leering at me from behind his Powerbook.

He soon started messaging me with crude offers of sex. I thought he must be some kind of crazy stalker/rapist so I started playing for time by messaging him back while I called my boyfriend and asked him to come get me.

When Steve arrived, I made my excuses and quickly left. I pointed the crazy guy out to Steve and he waited around the corner with a bat but the guy never came out. It was scary as hell.

[bloggers_creep_me_out @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

"maria" may be more right than s/he realizes. why did everyone, including the guy who wrote the story, assume that the girl was available? the real maria might have had better things to do that evening than sit in a coffee shop and converse with this guy, especially since the modality was decidedly weird. flirting sometimes goes one way, you know--the girl may have interpreted the exchange as an innocent and humorous discussion (c'mon, "maria i sweat your music"? obviously a joke).

still, the larger issue is worth commenting on. if you are too chicken to come and talk to somebody in person, it will be just you and your blog for a good long time. you'll never get so much as a friend to talk about music with, let alone a date.

finally, you all blogosphere inhabitants may share that definitional socio-behavioral characteristic in common, but don't assume that everyone else is as shy as you are... some people are just aloof.

[Payton Chung @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

"here people fit into the category of either 1)non-bathers or 2)potential serial killers"

um, no, and you're being completely ridiculous. I work in a policy shop, and we talk all of the time, but about about work (politics, more or less), which is an endlessly rich subject. save your hating for someone else.
- pc

[Payton Chung @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

furthermore, I just don't see how iTunes-sharing-in-public is all that different from kids sticking little 1" rock-band buttons (or adults sticking political campaign buttons) on their bags, or looking around the train/cafe/whatever to see what books/magazines/newspapers people are reading. all of these are just small ways of making information about one's tastes "cheaper," that is, easier for the casual viewer to access. (plus, the information thus conveyed may be more accurate than the often inaccurate presumptions made about the usual cheap data points: race, gender, age, ethnicity, wealth, sexual orientation, religion, etc.)

even in "Before Sunrise," that ridiculously idealized tale of flirting, the boy doesn't hit on the girl until he has picked her out as (a) an English speaker and (b) a smartie thanks to what she's reading--again, a cheap source of information. attempting to strike up a conversation with everyone on the train wouldn't "make him more aware," it would just be a waste of time.

in any case, it's completely incidental and doesn't affect bystanders (like, oh, Mr. of_the_apes) either way. if other people don't have "the balls or the ovaries" to corner every single person they think find even mildly attractive or interesting (which would take all day for the average city dweller), I guess that's their problem.

[DKLA @ Dec 19th 2005 2:10AM]

Y'know, that just happened to me today at our local public library. Someone had an iTunes library called "Dan's Music" which was locked so I changed my library name to "Please unlock your library, Dan :)". Sure enough, a few minutes later the library was unlocked and we were sharing tunes.... :)