Microsoft's TBox auto computer road-ready?
posted Apr 5th 2005 4:55PM
Remember the old joke about what would happen if Microsoft
made cars? Well, it looks like the joke may be on us. Word is that Microsoft's in-car computer, the TBox, is good to
go, with functionality that includes GPS, music control, electronic yellow pages, and access to vehicle diagnostics.
According to Forrester Research, MS "has finally cracked the code with a working device that provides more
functionality at a lower cost than anything else available today." All new Fiat models (like the Punto, pictured) are
expected to include the system. It's not surprising that Microsoft wants into this market — auto computers are expected
to be worth as much as $6 billion by 2010. Still, the idea of a car running something called "Windows Automotive" makes
us a little nervous. As the joke says, if Microsoft made cars, "occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no
reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it,
and reopen the windows before you could continue."
[Thanks, Lester]
There are so many jokes that go with this, here are just some:
1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would have to
buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason,
and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn, would cause
your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would
have to reinstall the engine.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought
"Car95" or "CarNT." But then you would have to buy more seats.
6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable,
five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would only run
on five per cent of the roads.
7. The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would be
replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.
8. New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.
9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.
10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out
and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the
door handle, turned the key, and grab hold of the radio antenna.
11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of
Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they
neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete this option
would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50% or
more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the
Justice Department.
12. Everytime GM introduced a new model car buyers would have to learn
how to drive all over again because none of the controls would
operate in the same manner as the old car.
13. You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.
^^^ Hilarious!
I so am not looking forward to this...........
- Vikram
www.FaeLLe.com
Microsoft + cheaper = better?
I'll pass...I mean, I'll pass the car on the side of the road while they reboot.
Microsoft and FIAT? Thats a reliability match made in hell. If there is one car vendor that has been plagued by reliablity problems and electric system glitches, It's Fiat.
I know you guys are funny and all, but just to let the more uninformed who read this thread and think you guys are being serious, none of the above scenarios could ever happen. The car computer in question is strictly disconnected from any of the control functions of the car, and any "crash" that could possibly happen would certainly not be the fault of microsoft.
Not only FIAT this system has been used in the BMW 7 Series too ;)
- Vikram
www.FaeLLe.com
Give people what they want and just include an iPod with the car. no one needs any of the things microsoft is pushing with this "solution". The first comment summed it all up, He's Rick James B*tch!
[comment spam deleted - ed.]
alternatively, Your Red fiat suddenly turns blue as your driving down the highway :P
MS GPS unit audio to driver "All blue skies ahead"........ CRASH!!!!!!
Two comments:
1. FIAT = Fix It Again, Tony. So it is a marriage made in heaven! Poor European schmos who buy FIATs !!!
2. Let's pray that the good folks at Microsoft will never branch into flight computers, black boxes and avionics. (Not that I would like to open yet another bag of "if Microsfot made airplanes" jokes :-)))
"3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive on."
My friend's 10-year-old Range Rover did this. Without help from Microsoft.
"7. The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning light."
My mom's Accord has a "service light" that comes on periodically. You have to turn the key backwards while pushing on some button to turn it off.
"12. Everytime GM introduced a new model car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would
operate in the same manner as the old car."
Throughout the years, I've driven many cars with "non-standard" controls, especially the light switch: on the dashboard, underneath the steering column, foot-activated high-beams, etc.
they forgot three letters "shi"
And if car makers made operating systems:
The second you took your hand off the keyboard, you would crash killing all members of the family and 3 members of the family of strangers who were also using the OS nearby.
10. Occasionally, for no reason, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grabbed the radio antenna.
I actually owned a newer GM. The car would randomly decide that the oil needed to be changed and warned you with a light. Every time you 'reinstalled' the oil, you had to, from the off position, turn the car only *part-way on* (careful- not too far!) while holding down the brake pedal for *exactly* three seconds just to get the stupid warning light to go out. This was annoying as hell because sometimes you'd have to try five or six times turning the car on to see if the stupid thing worked, turn it off again, and start all over. Kind of reminds me of removing spyware on a PC.
Do you have to purchase seperate driver and passenger licenses?
This has been done for YEARS... just MS never knew about it. Now they are stealing our ideas!. We should sue their asses off!
www.mp3car.com
Is it just me, or does a Microsoft system in a car called the PUNTO come a little too close to PINTO for karmic comfort?
To #1's 'joke' #13: Why's that a joke?
My car has a starter button (no keys, you know, one of those first but anonymous uses of RFID for keyless entrance, as a factory option on my regular mid-size Renault Laguna).
And apparently you have no clue about cars: ALL cars that have a starter button don't have a Shutdown button but you just press Start again. Microsoft's software is involved in all critical national defense systems etc., why don't anyone complain about that before bugging about the (almost always) single-citizen used cars ...?
Yah your right O W they are stealing our ideas
the-X @www.car-pc.info the german car-pc community
Fiat and Microsoft have already partnered once in the UK - there is a limited edition of their Stilo hatchback called the XBox edition. It's black and has little green bits of trim, plus a fancy stereo. Oh, and you get a free XBox with it. That's 'with it', as opposed to 'built in'. Naff.
Carp! Why do I have to live in the United States, home of litigation. I wonder if this will ever be sold here. I used to frequent MP3car.com, but got married before I ever had a functional car PC installed (now it's all over, ha ha.) This could be a good thing for those of us without the time for all of the hardware hacking and custom fabrication.
"13. You would press the 'start' button to shut off the engine."
Even on regular cars, you do in fact use the start button to shut off the engine. It's just called the 'ignition' instead of the start button. How silly.
I like #10 though. =)
In all seriousness, I am sort of looking foreward to having computer controlled cars (maybe not particularly Microsoft though.)
The perks would be great, from simple as being able to adjust your turning radius, to (a little farther in the future) self driven cars.
I'm confused ... I had all this YEARS ago (at least 6 years now??) in Microsoft's AutoPC platform by Clarion. Is the only difference that its now updated tech and installed by the dealer?
I can see that some of you are obviously Mac fans. Yea, I know that this is not going to be perfect and 100% flawless, but it is the first of it's kind, and the first isn't going to be perfect. You're just pissed that Mac didn't come up with the idea first, so why don't all of you Mac fans just stay @ Macworld.com where the "5%" of all Mac fans should be.
I think its just another gizmo in your car. Relax guys, This car is *still* not control by microsoft.
I wonder it will take a while for automobile industry to use a high level OS/software to control of thier machine.
A car stereo with a DVD player, MP3 player, TV and GPS navegation and wireless internet access and games is something lots of people are interested in, myself included. In fact "CarPC" stuff is already for sale, including cases and motherboards that fit in the standard car-stereo space.
Bill Gates gets stuck on the highway. He closes all the windows and tries restarting it.
Any idea why neither the Microsoft nor the Fiat site make any mention of this? You would think they'd both be very smug about it. The only hint I found was a press release from July 2004:
http://fiat.com/cgi-bin/pbrand.dll/FIAT_COM/news/news.jsp?contentOID=1073977405
Could they be having, um, delays?
- Yishay
MS just keep on pinching what people do already
www.dashboardmonkey.co.uk
I like to blog here too about my home made car computer installs!