Caption contest: the LAN party to end all LAN parties
By Ryan Block 
posted Jul 22nd 2005 2:55PM
posted Jul 22nd 2005 2:55PM
Ryan: "Photo taken from behind double paned glass. Do you have any idea what that place smells like?"
Marc: "Yes, that's your workstation, row 300, desk 27. What, you were expecting maybe a cubicle?"
Barb: "Workers at Happy Cog, Inc. dreamed of the day management would upgrade their single shared DSL line."
[Photo via Engadget Spanish]
"PC Load letter... what the fuck does that mean?"
...Sorry... had to.
Looking down on the floor of Mission Control, agast, the NASA Flight Director started to think that perhaps they had tried to initiate a few too many safety procedures on this latest shuttle flight.
Hi! This is Bob from Capital One, calling to tell you about a great new....Hello?
Veruca Salt:
"As soon as I told my father that I simply had to have one of the Golden tickets, he went out into the town and started buying up all the Wonka candy bars he could lay his hands on. Thousands of them, he must have bought. Hundreds of thousands. Then he had them loaded on to trucks and sent directly to his own factory. He's in the software business, you see, and he's got about a hundred nerds working for him, writing software for pennies an hour. So he says to them, "Okay, everyone," he says, "from now on, you can stop writing software and start shelling the wrappers off these crazy candy bars instead." And they did from morning till night. Three days went by and we had no luck. I got more and more upset each day, and every time he came home I would scream at him, "Where's my Golden Ticket?" I would lie on the floor kicking and screaming for hours. Then on the evening of the fourth day, one of his programmers yelled, "I've got it!" My father grabbed it from her and rushed it home to me. And now, I'm all smiles.
Sorry, it was all I had :(
"Keep working.....We have to ship Windows Vista on time!!!!!!"
This is how we cut down the electricity cost: by removing all light bulbs and use the light from the monitors. Clever huh?
In the world CTF semifinals, teammembers could easily be identified with the last-minute "shirts" and "skins" designation decision.
What a M$ certification center may as well look like.
Welcome to Banglore International Airport. Your workstation is over there...
"Alright... Now, who's the idiot running bittorent on our network?!"
"OMG A GIRL... RUN!!!"
or
"Wow, everyone has a porn share on his machine!"
"Surprised?"
A thousand monkeys, typing on a thousand typewriters will eventually type the entire works of William Shakespeare.
Bill Gate's vision of the future.
Fan(bottom left): "Gulp."
Where is the master AC switch I need to do a hard reboot for everybody?
"OMG A GIRL... RUN!!!"
or
"Wow, everyone has a porn share on his machine!"
"Surprised?"
!!NERDS!!
- Booger
Group 23 of 54 Microsoft debug team.
"Umm.. are you sure, it's your desk?"
Do you know how fast this guy http://www.engadget.com/entry/1234000663051185/ has to ride to generate enough electricity to run all those PC's!
Wow, they've learned to reproduce asexually and exponentially!
"The Machines have won!"
or
"More Sausage than Winerschnitzel"
Dude, what's up with some of the buff guys with no shirts? I See five of them. What kind of LAN party is this?
Fishes,
narco.
"Once everyone clicks on 2,000 ad links everyone can go home, and not before!"
So this is what happened to those babies with the headphones... http://www.engadget.com/entry/1234000437049894/
Adena Farmers INC
ok guys, lets see what happens if we all play crazy frog at the same time...... *earth explodes*
The new worship plan by Pope Benedict XVI has Vatican users directly talking to God in a chatroom.
Apparently there is a lot of lag.
Welome to my World of Warcraft duping farm.
"Phone support call center in India"
what sides big brother on ?
"There are fields, Neo, endless fields, where human beings are not relaxing, but programming. I didn't believe it either, until I saw it with my own eyes."
We are the borg...your life as it has been is over. From this time forward you will service, us....
We are the borg...your life as it has been is over. From this time forward you will service, us....
"we did it. we just broke the guinness record for most 40+ year old virgins in one room."
wanna see a hydro meter spin?
IT manager down on the floor...
"Damn it Dave, did you bother to set up everyone's roaming profiles before you let them on?!?!?!"
Guy on phone one floor above: "Sir, I am not lying. We have people working on your problem right now."
Receptionist to new Employee: "You will be working on two computers. The first one is in row 173, 20th one down. The second is in row 51, 15th one down. According to Corporate policy, you are not allowed to be seen walking between these computers for more than 10 minutes in a day. "
Funny?
the first caption #26 and #32 take the cake :D
Welcome to PornFest 2006!
PS - Don't they host this during CES in Vegas?
Just your average MMORPG sweatshop.
"Holy crap, this is larger than the Battle at Minas Tirith! And these guys aren't CG!!"
"Counter-Terrorists Win."
Okay, two quick ones...
"Hey! Who's the weisenheimer with the Intel Prescott box? We're burning in here!"
"Dell service and support. How may I help you? *sigh*"
OMG how damn hot must it be in ther?
"And in news today, Google finally owned up that they have millions of child slave laborers returning the search results of their popular search engine"
Now that the billion monkeys typing at typewriters has finally tapped out the complete works of William Shakesphere, We are at stage 2:
How long will it take that many day traders pounding at computers to type the complete code for the new Windows Vista?
Sausagefest 2005.
BINGO!
Oh... Crap! I'm in the wrong room!
The EPA just found what really causes global warming.
OMGWTFLOLBBQ!
Google Pigeon Rank beta: when they figured out that pigeons are cheaper
first of all, i must say this. adam (#25), as a roman catholic, i took some major offense to that caption.
now to my caption:
"Give me my AOL dialup back, even thats faster than this crap!"
(btw, i wouldn't get aol's service if it was free, i had it for a while and hated it, verizon dsl is much better)
You'll never find a more vile hive of nerds and pornography.
"Bill Gate's vision of the future."
No, you forgot the Blue Screen of Death on all those computers.
"Hi! Welcome to Sunnyville Elementary school! Once you've answered enough support calls, we can move on to mimimum-wage coding 101.
And remember: Stay in school, or you won't get a job in the IT business!"
"Fire! ...Just kidding!
"Goddamn it, I said NO RUSH!"
To quote directly from Futurama:
"Ow, my sperm!"
OK! Who spilled soda on my keyboard?!
Steve Jobs called in all the mac users for a meeting.
or:
Each one of these people control various movements and expressions of Steve Ballmer. Notice the guy asleep at the "sweat control station"
Welcome to the 2005 Annual Virgin Games
Satan has mannnnnny helpers.
back from lunch.. "Does anybody remember where we parked our PC?"
Proof that Duke Nukem Forever isn't Vaporware...
Atari's hard at work getting the finishing touches on Pong 2.
"There are fields, endless fields, where gamers are no longer born, we are grown"
EA Developer Retreat...
"No wonder the battle.net server is always down..."
"All your base are belong to us"
A/S/L?
"Ok so...where can I plug up my iMac?"
"An exclusive behind the sceens look at the Weblogs, Inc. Network."
"this is the last known photo of john smith alive just seconds before he tripped over the main power cord for the network switch"
Best Buy's Geek Squad gathers to get their marching orders from Chief Inspector Gadget.
It's actually just 10 computers and 2 mirrors.
> Ryan: “Photo taken from behind double paned glass. Do you have any idea what that place smells like?”
A: Sweaty Bawls
So who farted??
Is this the light at the end of the tunnel??
CompUSSR
"EVERYONE! THIS WILL JUST TAKE A SECOND! HAS ANYONE SEEN A FLOPPY LABELED 'Cure for Cancer'? C'MON GUYS THIS IS SERIOUS!"
"Local Walmart baffled by shortage of Depends and Red Bull."
"The one place where there are no lines to the women's restrooms."
Nerds, why'd it have to be nerds...
*Speaker comes on* Ok Folks NBC needs a new poll on...
Microsoft HQ: Maybe there is a small chance we might see Longhorn coming soon, as the developers are busy.
After sending out each person in the United States 3 copies of the latest Pottery Barn catalog (with different covers) this past week, Pottery Barn operators sit by their workstations waiting for a flooding of calls to take orders. Rumor has it that they are still waiting....
Network is down again? Who unplugged their workstation from the phonenet network again!? DAMMIT, why haven't we upgraded to BNC yet!
Ok.... Who farted?
For all you GAIM users....
"WHO THE HELL IS 'SLIGHTLY LESS BORING'!?!?! STOP IM'ing ME!!!!!! CURSE YOU!!!!"
"connection reset by peer", "Who the h3#$%l is peer???"
The Real Matrix.
Or
Follow the White Rabbit.
The only free WiFi spot in Israel.
Microsoft's software facility where programmers debug the new Vista operating system 24/7.
Its a Vienna Sausage Party.
Damn! Who farted?
“Daddy were does SPAM come from?”
Or
Meanwhile at Microsoft Legal…
“Damnit no one leave this room until find and delete ALL the post of that damn XBOX 360 bas***d!”
Man, I thought that this offshore operation would be a little more plush, it's a old cruise ship right?
Welcome to the largest chatroom in the world.
NASA's massive software team was forced to work overtime since last week trying to debug the Space Shuttle's fuel sensor problem. "We were told not to go home and take our shirts off if we sweated too much. I tell you man, it was too much pressure for me!", exclaimed a frustrated software engineer....