Danish troops equipped with MP3 pillows
Seeing how things could, um, be going a little better over in Iraq, it's not surprising that the Danish army has equipped its troops with a secret new weapon designed to completely obliterate remaining insurgent outposts. No, this is not some fancy sniper detector, or even one of those crazy killbots being designed by the South Koreans; rather, the Denmark Royal Defense College has issued a total of 20 MP3-playing pillows to overseas troops (10 each to Iraq and Kosovo) under the guise of easing the soldiers' battered psyches. The pillows have built-in speakers that pipe out soothing instrumental ballads and nature sounds (called MusiCure), and have been certified by the International Red Cross as the most humane way to smother one's enemies (we made that last part up). As with other technologies designated as dual-use, however, we have a sneaking suspicion that the Danes are actually using these musical pillows to blast tunes from their Nordic brethren ABBA to the far corners of Baghdad, incapacitating hardened insurgents with the sweet, soulful sounds of "Mama Mia."
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Quaddw @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
Lol, seems kinda useless though that smothering part was kinda nice :P
Scott @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
The Danes who resisted the Nazi occupation during WWII must weep when they see what pussies their grandchildren have turned into.
Michael Greenberg @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
Why do you feel compelled to give us your, um, political comments? Do you think it's wise to, like, er, um, alienate half your viewers? And, ahem, do you really think things are going poorly in Iraq, or is that just, um, wishful thinking?
Saffy @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
Nice. What's next, is the Sharper Image gonna get a defense contract with Moldavia next? It'd love to see an army go into battle with crappy air purifiers. After all, the air must get pretty bad, what with all the bombs and mortar shells exploding around you.
Makes about as much sense (if not more) than mp3 pillows.
SomeJoe @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
I second the point about your political opinions. And anyway, your timing just completely sucks. Yesterday more than 10 million Iraqis peacefully approved their first democratic constitution.
Stick with gadgets.
Saffy @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
Um, Michael? I'm sure Evan/Peter don't want this to become a political debate, and I'll admit that I'm politically probably your polar opposite, but if you can't accept a notion as fundamental as "Things could be going better in Iraq," then I'd have to say you're bordering on delusional, to say the least.
Saying things could be going better is pretty innocuous, and apolitical. I dont think theyre running the risk of alienating half of their readers by stating what couldnt be more obvious unless you were standing somewhere in Iraq outside the green zone when a car bomb blows up in your face.
If Evan had written something like Our administration lied us into war by fixing the facts around their policy, and now were stuck in a quagmire where the best option we have is to hope to hell this constitution gets ratified so that the Islamists can take over the country and we can get out of there with our tail between our legs, then that would be a political comment.
Itd still be true, but itd be a political comment.
And the quip about wishful thinking is not only uncalled for, but extremely insensitive to the writers/editors youre reading on a daily basis. To imply that Evan or anyone in their right mind would wish for things to continue in a violent, bloody downward spiral just for the sake of making the administration look bad is ridiculous. The administration and the GOP are doing a good enough job of that on their own.
Now hows that for a political comment?
anon @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
Has anyone read "brave new world?" this thing reminds me of the whole brainwashing with pleasant songs thing they do to kids while they sleep.
hoplite @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
Explain to me how you quip about how the administration and the GOP isnt uncalled for even more so? Why do you imply that the administration and the GOP are working on making the situation as you put it a violent, bloody downward spiral? The fact that 10 million Iraqis voted in there first democratic election must get your blood boiling; not unlike the criminal Muslim extremists whos ultimate goal you share.?
EatingPie @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
This thread is indicative as to why I don't want political comment on this site. We've entered into a flame war about liberal/conservative views on the war, the President, and whatever. C'mon there's a billion other places I can go for this kinda crap.
I do, however, feel that the statement was rather light in the article -- our reaction, however, illustrates what a hotbed issue this is, and how hard it is to even make minor quipps.
Besides, nobody commented on the most obvious piece of wackiness: they're supplying their thousands of troops with ... umm... 10 pillows?? Way to go Danes! Show those troops just how much you care!!
-Pie
Saffy @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
hoplite, I wasn't (at least intentionaly)implying that the GOP are working to make the situation look bad. If it sounds like that's what I meant, I appologize. On the contrary, I think the administration is dying for some good news to come out of Iraq.
What I was trying to say was that the GOP are doing a good enuogh job of making themselves look bad (Can you say Valerie Plame, Tom Delay, Bill Frist, Tom Noe, Duke Cunningham, etc?)all by themselves.
And as for the Iraqi constitution, you can read my opinions about that here
http://www.italknews.com/member/spage.php?content=16304
But I agree with Pie. This has gone far enough on Engadget. Anyone who wants to continue this discussion can do so though email. You can find mine at the above link.
Dull @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
ABBA is from Sweden. Most likely they would be blaring "Barbie Girl" by Aqua.
Mike I. @ Dec 19th 2005 2:37AM
#3...
Please, man. If you don't like the articles, then go somewhere else. I find their comments funny. It brings extra interest in the stories. You know, so they're not so boring... Just because they may not agree with everything you think doesn't mean they must shut up because they're "wrong." Besides, this is a blog. What did you expect to find on a blog other than people's opinions?