If we weren't sure before, then we're definitely positive now: the impending PlayStation 3 release has officially driven people to madness. As if folks quitting their jobs, ditching their fiancés, and perpetrating drive-by shootings weren't enough, we've just gotten word that a dentist in Columbus, Ohio leveraged some of those cavity-filling profits to hire an unbelievable 60 temp workers to stand in line at four area Wal-Marts. Although not a videogame fan himself, Dr. Murry Newlin wanted to spread the Christmas cheer to his grandchildren, nieces, and nephews by picking up 15 of the next-gen consoles -- a feat that would be impossible for one man to accomplish alone, but that would seem rather trivial for an army of temporary employees. Newlin rotated the line-goers every eight hours, and if sour grapes complaints to store managers and the temps' employment agencies hadn't caused him abandon the plan yesterday afternoon, our rough estimate is that the whole deal would have set him back about $23,400 when all was said and done -- or about the cost of two PS3s on eBay. So what did we learn from this whole ordeal? Simple: if you're one of Dr. Newlin's grandkids, we hate to break it to you, but scuttling his plan because of a few whiny fanboys means grandpa just doesn't love you very much.
Update: Whoops, it turns out that this all went down in Columbus, Georgia and not Columbus, Ohio. Oh Christopher Columbus, why did you have to inspire almost as many city names as Jebediah Springfield?