Caption contest: the last crusader astride his trusty Segway

Look, we don't know the where, we don't know the when, and we sure as hell don't know the why, but there's no way that's going to stop us from getting a few chuckles in at Mr. Segway Crusader's expense.

Ryan: "In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti, et Segway. Amen." or, "O blessed art thou Segway firmware upgrade, which keeps thyself upright."
Paul: "Orlando Bloom's got nothing on this"
Evan: "Wilford Brimley found out a little too late that habitual consumption of Quaker Oats can lead to insanity."
Chris: "With parallel parking in 13th-century Bethlehem virtually impossible to find, Bill found his handicapped permit priceless."
Conrad: "Maximus Decimus Meridius Segwius."

[Via Fark]

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 27th 2006 5:49PM]

Jesus, after performing this miracle: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qiaaiP_cGo

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 27th 2006 6:13PM]

"Dude, I am so high right now."

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 27th 2006 6:39PM]

WITCH ITS A WITCH OFF WITH HER HEAD!!!!!

[Oakraidr Posted Dec 27th 2006 6:38PM]

The leader of the crusaders for the Pope, show of their new attack vehicle.

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 29th 2006 5:21PM]

CHAAAARRGE!!!...ow my hip....

[aughscreennames Posted Dec 28th 2006 3:02PM]

Cry havoc, and let slip the Segways of war

[sgteaston Posted Dec 27th 2006 8:52PM]

+4 Movement over smooth terrain.

[lutfijd Posted Dec 28th 2006 5:35PM]

See, science and religion CAN go together.

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 27th 2006 7:09PM]

"Quo vadis?"
"Seg-Way"

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 27th 2006 8:02PM]

"I'm with the hero of time, he always brings me gifts, not like that Princess Zelda."

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 27th 2006 7:45PM]

"Look, we don't know the where, we don't know the when, why..."

Where: Northern California Renaissance
When: Sep 9th to Oct 15th 2006 (I recall it was one of the last weekends)
Why: Who knows, but I remimber seeing him...

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 27th 2006 9:15PM]

Nerf Pallies!

[heycable Posted Dec 27th 2006 8:07PM]

Now, off to the crusades!

[heytherekiller Posted Dec 27th 2006 8:11PM]

"THE POWER OF CHRIST PROPELS YOU!!!"

[Neebs Posted Dec 28th 2006 1:14PM]

YOU WIN.

[heytherekiller Posted Dec 28th 2006 1:42PM]

of course I do... now what was the prize? It was a million dollars... right?

(catch the reference? anyone? anyone?)

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 28th 2006 6:12AM]

Ho ho ho, you raghead sons of bitches.

[PreGHz Posted Dec 27th 2006 8:58PM]

Iter faciamus!

Bumper sticker = "Crusadus in curru." or "Buccina fracta - exspecta signum digiti impudici."

If anyone gets these, then I love you. And you're a nerd.

[npChaos Posted Dec 27th 2006 9:34PM]

Our elderly hero spots yon dragon oft in the distance...

"Halt! You vile dragon, I lean forth, towards you..."

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 27th 2006 9:24PM]

"+4 Movement over smooth terrain."


...and there went the Mt. Dew, right out my nose. Hilarious.

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 27th 2006 9:49PM]

"+4 Movement over smooth terrain."


...and there went the Mt. Dew, right out my nose. Hilarious.

[cetus corr Posted Dec 27th 2006 9:28PM]

My enemies will think I am a God on my horseless chariot!

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 27th 2006 10:00PM]

This man was spotted at the scene of a mild disturbance at the market. After ranting about quantum foam and then muttering about albino shouting gorillas, the fellow was seen fleeing. At an alarmingly slow rate. Atop what appears to be some ludicrous medieval buggy.

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 27th 2006 10:30PM]

"in hoc segway vinces" - on this segway you will conquer
from Roman history's "in hoc signo vinces"
God's message to Constantine that "in this sign (the cross) you will conquer"
"in" in Latin can mean "in", "into" or "on"

[Aram Posted Dec 27th 2006 11:22PM]

The Red Sea would part this time, Moses was sure of it.

[chef Posted Dec 28th 2006 12:58AM]

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 28th 2006 4:08AM]

I cant find a spot for disabled segway drivers ANYWHERE in this darn carpark.

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 28th 2006 9:20AM]

after searching space and time, King Arthur returns with the true Holy Grail. All Praise the Segway..

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 28th 2006 2:54PM]

The Wii: Old crap running on new hardware. Sure it's a new way to interact with the world, but there's always the threat of busting your ass. (i.e. a certain president)

[dictionaaron Posted Dec 28th 2006 3:02PM]

"My battery's dead and i gotta take a dump for christ sake!"

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 28th 2006 7:26PM]

"Vice President Cheney ventures out after months of seclusion. Hopes his new disguise will fool Helen Thomas."

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 9th 2007 3:09AM]

Just after this pic was taken, Santa's new, oversized cape unfortunately got caught between the Segway's wheel and fender, causing Saint Nick to choke to death.

Santa was forced to deliver presents via Segway when his sleigh & reindeer were carjacked.

When planning to ride his Segway at full speed, Santa prefers not to wear any underwear.

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 29th 2006 10:54AM]

Thou mayest laugh now, but I hear he is undefeated in the joust!

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 29th 2006 11:03AM]

Edna: No capes!

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 29th 2006 11:03AM]

You fool! I said, "bring me a siege engine"!

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 29th 2006 9:35PM]

Motorcross.

[(Unverified) Posted Dec 30th 2006 3:09AM]

"...The King trusts not, the toleration of the inquisition. The gibbet shall not be thine but the SEGWAY shall claim thee and Guy of Auvergne within the hour..."

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 3rd 2007 6:41AM]

Dude, where's my car?

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 4th 2007 2:19AM]

These boots weren't made for walking (and I'm gonna roll right over you).