But who's going to watch the CCTV cams? That's the irony apparently lost on the Lothian and Borders Safety Camera Partnership, which is considering installing CCTV cameras to monitor its speed cameras that are frequently the target for vandalism. "There are companies there who would provide us with CCTV coverage of the cameras themselves - the cameras looking after the cameras kind of thing," said Colin McNeil, the head of the group. We're not even making this stuff up. All we know is that as soon as they install these suckers, we're grabbing the first plane to Scotland and liveblogging the hysteria.

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CCTV cameras to watch for speed camera vandalism. Rinse, repeat.