Caption contest: eternal rest inside a Nokia
By Chris Ziegler 
posted Mar 30th 2007 2:17PM
posted Mar 30th 2007 2:17PM
Chris: "Giving 'Early Termination Fee' a whole new meaning."
Ryan: "Nokia: connecting dead people."
Paul: "Of course it comes with an FM radio!"
Sean: "Though it will never pass the pocket test, the coffin does include the rarely used AG2GP (Audio Grave to Grave) Bluetooth profile."
Evan: "*Casket will only work in certain graveyards, $200 reburial fee applicable"
if it were an iphone he would probably come back to life
Connecting People...to the afterlife?
Nokia will not be held responsible if you and/or a loved one rises from the dead as a zombie due to radiation levels found inside the NOKIA7250 branded coffin.
Legal Note: not intended for use by vampires and those already undead.
In Soviet Russia, phone owns you!
All I know is it makes it a hell of a lot easier than praying to talk to your loved ones...
Talk about getting "locked in" to a long-term contract...
Dial 1-800-IAM-DEAD
I guess this puts the final nail in the coffin of that old "Cellphones are bad/not bad for your health" debate...
Can you hear me now? No??? oh wait...
Gives new meaning to the term "dead ringer."
This model will not work in certain dead zones.
Ring, Ring, "The person you are trying to call is DEAD right now, If you would like to leave a message press 1."
"Live by the Cellphone, die by the cellphone."
"Now in Human powered Version, the ultimate in Eco-Friendly!"
"This here took first prize in the fair this year, the others just couldn't get their weight up."
Three words: no roaming fee
Now with longer battery life!
This way, if you get buried alive, you can call for help
Nokia decides to target a new demographic with their latest offering.
"I cant hear you, let me get my forklift-free set..."
"I'd sell my soul for good reception!"
"Well, at least his cell phone battery didn't die."
"Was he killed during peace time?" "No, KIA"
Alltel Circle of Life?
"Buried by Long Distance charges?"
I hope this casket is RoHS compliant.
Isn't that the phone Zack Morris used on "Saved By the Bell"?
Steve Jobs readies the last piece of his stage as he prepares for the actual iPhone release and the death of traditional mobile phone.
I guess the deceased is lucky that it isn't a flip phone
Alexander Graham Bell: "So you see, in the future, telephones may be able to send signals without wires, but will of course require hundreds of vacuum tubes and will be approximately the size of a coffin"
"Fewer dropped caskets than any other carrier."
- Josh
http://www.stateofbrain.com
One more:
"Let this be a lesson -- always read the fine print in your contract."
The Rigor Mortis foiled Joe's wishes to be buried in a CSC (Clam Shell Coffin) so his family had to settle for the CBC model (Candy Bar).
I hope the batteries on mine don't explode
"Finally! I am able to communicate with my 50ft robot!" -Michael Jackson
What happens when God decides to trade in his old cellphone for a new one.
ET Phone home
"...I swear to God, dude, if you shout 'imma chargin ma razr' one more time, it'll be the LAST time you ever say it."
Your ears may rot; our headset will not.
"...improves reception in elevators, rural areas, and under six feet of compacted soil!"
"Hello, this is the after life. If you are going to heaven press 1, going to hell press 2, for all other calls please wait for the next Romero movie sequel...."
Does this Caskette come in a slider or Clamshell version?
Never miss a call again.
Ever.
That is one way of "Calling it quits".
With the rise of car accident deaths attributed to drivers on their cell phone. Nokia has launched this exclusive casket modeled like the 7250 to those who parted this planet wirelessly. Available in most areas, $4000 with 1000yr agreement, $500 early termination fee. Availble at most metropolitan graveyards.
STILL on hold.
Yes, it is refurbished, but not used!
The RAZR coffin was to thin for Anna Nicole.
hey, finally a place to put my n-gage
What??!? Couldn't they have waited just a couple of months for an iPhone coffin?
The silent ringer is a big hit at the funeral...
For those of you with an open casket - there is a full sized QWERTY keyboard for texting friends!
Do you think he is compensating for something?
This is what happens to people that end their contract early! They are owned by the carrier.
Does that say Cingular? Oh I guess Cingular is officially dead.
You're never too old for a Nokia!
" I'm sorry but this service has been terminated "
God
"HELLO. YES I'M JUST AT A THE CREMATORIUM. YES IT'S A FUNERAL FOR SOME RELATION OF MINE, NOT SURE WHICH."
All hail the mighty Trigger Happy TV.
"New Nokia caskets click together side-by-side so that family members may purchase a block of gravesites and share them. Nokia... Connecting People."
Here lie the bones of Arthur Jones.
His calls would break up often.
His widow MayBelle
Just couldn't tell
That he wanted something for his coughin'.
The reception is great, but if you go over your minutes the fees will KILL YOU!
It's one of those new 5 band phones, the new one connects to hell with a 300 baud data transfer rate.
Well having a nokia in your pocket might mean you are over the hill, but I guess if you are in the nokia's pocket, then you are under the hill.
Anyway, "This casket is free after $200 mail in rebate, with an eternal service commitment."
"Can you hear me now?"
"After the fiery accident, his family opted for a candybar style ceremony instead of a clam-shell style."
" * - Bluetooth soul transfer feature deactivated by Verizon"
"No cell-phones in the hospital was bad enough, but no cell phones in heaven?"
There are several of these shops in Accra, like this one. The locals talk about how from time to time there's a new flurry of interest when somebody from CNN or the NYT "discovers" them all over again.
"this one comes with a dead battery"
Naomi Campbell's most recent victim.
Realizing a untapped market, Nokia moves into coffin cellphones, sporting the new slogan: "Cell Phones: Dont Be Caught Dead Wihtout One."
"Jesus called him home."
"I don't care if it IS free, I want a Treo!"
"We told you, Chad, we would do stuff! Now get rid of My Circle."
"Bluetooth feature may not work if burried deeper than 8 feet."
I can't hear anything. I must be in a dead spot.
"Outdated coffins meet outdated phones."
Micheal Jackson's robot statue will include a to-scale working Nokia cell.
WOW! Is that who won the Engadget birthday contest?
I can't lose my rollover minutes.
"97% Nation wide coverageon ground and six-feet-under"
I wouldn't be caught dead in one of those!
disconnecting people
beee-beeee-beeeeep
The number, 555-####, has been disconnected.
The number, 555-####, has been disconnected.
No further information is available.
Nokia's newest phone: "So big, you can fit a body in there!"
WOW no one made any jokes about the vibrate mode possibilites!!
Well while you might not need many minutes in the afterlife consider this, you will be pestered by telemarketers with no way to get off thier call lists.....for eternity!
"Nokia.... It's your life in there....."
I cant wait for the unboxing pics!
my phone's dead how bout' you?
As a cellphone salesman family is easy money. Grandma always said she'd never get one. I got the last laugh.
Sorry sir, you wouldn't fit the razr model.
S60 is still booting ...
"Featuring the first Human SIM Card"
"Your ears may rot: our headset will not"
But the most probable, knowing cell phone companies..
"Basic plan covers all roaming, text, and picture messaging for $39.95 a month; local calls made from a singular location incur additional charge at premium rate."
"Reach out and touch someone. Dead."
"Cingular. Raising the dead."
Here, sir, is our Deluxe model. Gaudyness to the extreme, it really is a model to die for...
"To Marketing- we know our users are old but this demographic isn't exactly viable"
Nokia announces "Your numbers up", the latest edition to the already larger than life cell phone array
"You held it all your life; now let it do the same for you" - Nokia: Connecting & Burying People
"Cell away into eternity"
The final chapter of the "Cellphone radiation is dangerous/not dangerous".
Lebeu
Hmm, if that would've been some newer model, I'd say he lived on the edge...but no, not this one :)
"Dude, you're battery is dead ..."
"Can you kill me now?..."
"GOOD!"
Horizon Wireless, Welcome to the afterlife.
"Can you smell me now?... Good!"
for the last time! your minutes do expire!
The ultimate long distance fee.
Nokia: Going Vertical
Other phones let you send a text and/or pics. The omega NOKIA model lets you send you soul.
Welcome to the MATRIX. You are a slave Neo. The phones have found all the power they need. Free your mind.
Ring-tones include My Blue Heaven, Pennies From Heaven, Stairway to Heaven, and Knockin' On Heaven's Door
A dead-ringer for a Dead Ringer
At the trial, his wife was quoted as saying, "He said that he needed to take this call, I said I am having a baby here! He said give me a minute, I didn't."