An AP report out today claims that AT&T has made "technical adjustments" to correct problems with its "overloaded servers", which have been making it hard or impossible for new iPhone owners to activate their device -- and as many of you know, a non-activated iPhone is essentially useless, save for emergency calls and showing off to your friends. A spokesman for the company said that while there have been problems with getting users up and running, nearly all customers have been able to activate their phones within five to eight minutes -- though we suspect that information will just be salt in the wound to people who are still having trouble. The rep also stated that the company is expecting new gears for its steam engines any day now, and that the laborers who shovel coal into its furnaces have doubled their efforts.