USB oil burner threatens everything you hold dear

There was a time in the not-too-distant past when if your apartment, dorm room or palatial mansion smelled like Cheetos, Diet Coke and unwashed laundry, there was simply nothing USB-related you could do about it. Sure, there were wall outlet fragrance "plug ins," scented candles, canned air fresheners, and of course windows which could be opened -- but not one of those was USB-powered. Of course, those days are long gone, because a random Chinese sweatshop has dreamed up another modern-day marvel: the USB oil burner. If you're like us (and we think you are), there's nothing you want to do more than pour scented oil into something that plugs into your computer. Available in rose and peppermint, $7 each.

[derekwilkinson Posted Jul 31st 2007 2:04AM]

those random Chinese sweatshops are not coming up with good ideas

[(Unverified) Posted Jul 31st 2007 2:02AM]

The guys at http://www.thinkgeek.com are scrambling because they didn't think of this first.

[(Unverified) Posted Jul 31st 2007 2:21AM]

You don't need a usb thingy for this - just lay your motherboard on its side, and pour the oil directly onto your processor. The processor itself heats the oil, and the fan circulates the fragrance.

[derekwilkinson Posted Jul 31st 2007 2:24AM]

LMAO

[Wat Posted Jul 31st 2007 2:27AM]

if its non-conductive like mineral oil, this just may work! maybe the graphics card manufacturers will take notice, and modify their GPU designs to put the processor on the top, and include bowl shaped heatsinks :)

[(Unverified) Posted Jul 31st 2007 11:18AM]

The harder you game, the more heat, and more heat produces more odor. Just like Apocalypse Now, "I love the smell of peppermint in the morning."

[Grey Acumen Posted Jul 31st 2007 10:33AM]

you may want to go take a drive down to the patent office about now. cause this seriously could work. I think the oil would even help cool things down, since as it is burned off, that would be dissipating more heat. the one issue is making sure it has a proper vent so the oil doesn't get stuck in your computer.

[(Unverified) Posted Jul 31st 2007 8:27PM]

I contacted my lawyer about securing a patent. He told me that he'd try it out and then email me back. I haven't heard back from him yet.

[(Unverified) Posted Jul 31st 2007 5:41AM]

What if your USB ports are vertical rather than horizontal? Mine are.

I can't believe I have to miss out on this fantastic innovation just because of that. Hopefully they'll make a right-angle adapter.

[(Unverified) Posted Jul 31st 2007 10:12AM]

it doesn't matter, there is a pad that the oil is dropped into, kinda like a maxi-pad. It won't leak.

[(Unverified) Posted Aug 1st 2007 6:47AM]

Turn your computer sideways? Get a hub?

[(Unverified) Posted Jul 31st 2007 5:50AM]

I'm still waiting for my SmellBlaster btw. Why didn't anyone make one of those for real by now?

[Roberini Posted Jul 31st 2007 7:26AM]

What a stupid idea. Why would you want something adding more heat near your pc, increasing the possibility of a fire. But, let's not get extreme about it just yet. But, I use a lot of pc's and recording equipment, and there is always a sentence or two about avoiding exposure to smoke as it can damage the internals of the gear. So, now you're bringing the smoke even closer to the computer and ...

Maybe I'm not the smart one here ...

[stridermt2k Posted Jul 31st 2007 7:27AM]

Ladies, don't miss that opportunity to screw with your partner by running in to the room with this yelling, "It's pink!, it's pink!".

Guys LOVE that.

[Shaner Posted Jul 31st 2007 9:00AM]

Too funny, I thought the same thing. USB pregnancy test!

[(Unverified) Posted Aug 1st 2007 3:06PM]

Sure they do. When I presented mine with an actual pregnancy test, he asked me if it was one of those usb thingie, thinking it was a gift for him.
Well it was. a very expensive one!

[Camperton Posted Jul 31st 2007 10:37AM]

Joshua ---

Hilarious post. Made my day.

[carbonize Posted Jul 31st 2007 11:07AM]

These have been available for about a year now. I seem to remember that Engadget ran a report on a company that would make them personalised for your company to give out (like you do with pens and key fobs). In fact a quick search shows at least three other companies that have released USB powered oil burners (or oil using air fresheners) as reported on Engadget. Guess they don't read their own site or bother to check if 'stories' are similar to older stories.

http://www.engadget.com/2004/03/06/usb-powered-fragrance-oil-burner/
http://www.engadget.com/2004/05/10/usb-powered-frangrance-diffuser/
http://www.engadget.com/2007/02/16/debreus-scent-drive-brings-aroma-to-the-flash-drive/

[tavisjohn Posted Aug 1st 2007 3:02AM]

Smell-a-vision 0.5!

Futurama here we come!

[(Unverified) Posted Aug 3rd 2007 6:27AM]

@SYN,
If they put bowl shaped heatsinks in a computer green leafy substance would go there and not oil