Sousaphone Hero not living up to expectations

Self-proclaimed "America's finest news source" The Onion reports that Activision's latest virtual-instrument title, Sousaphone Hero, isn't selling as well as the company had hoped, despite a $25M development budget, innovative wireless sousaphone controller, and versions available for PS3, 360, and Wii. Complaints range from the title's $345 price tag, repetitive gameplay, lack of non-marching-band music, and unresponsive "oompah" meter, while pro sousaphone players have taken umbrage at the lack of realism in the game. "The fingering's completely different, for starters," according to one sousaphonist The Onion interviewed. The report also says Activision is considering shelving three more planned Hero titles due to the tepid response, including the hotly-anticipated Cymbal Hero. Looks like the golden age of marching bands is truly at an end.

[Via Joystiq]

[Heath Stahl @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:05AM]

As long as Cowbell Hero still comes out I don't care.

[-ardcore Canadian @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:25AM]

That has comment of the day written on it if you ask me ;)
haha

[Curt Chambers @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:45AM]

I second that "comment of the day" nomination - that WAS funny!

[NickFoote @ Aug 2nd 2007 11:13AM]

Dude, definitely AccordionHero is going to kick more ass. And BagpipeHero is also going to be totally sweet.

[Ellianth @ Aug 2nd 2007 11:24AM]

I thought the story was funny. Then I read your comment. After how hard I laughed reading your comment, it doesn't feel like I laughed at all reading the story.

If there was a hall of fame I'd totally nominate you!

[jeff @ Aug 2nd 2007 12:48PM]

i got a feva!...and the only prescription is more cowbell!

[brad @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:06AM]

Dear Engadget,

You just went down a notch.

Thank You,

Brad

[Nate @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:15AM]

lame

[max @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:16AM]

Come on guys it's a Joke!!!!!!! The Onion makes only fake news!!!

[mike @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:29AM]

Brad ... are all Sousaphone players as easily offended as you are?

[riggs @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:20AM]

dont be such a lousaphone

[cyberVINN @ Aug 2nd 2007 1:49PM]

You guys are too hard on Brad. What if u guys had a Pre-Order on one of them!

[jaapv @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:13AM]

Another interesting item from the onion than would not be misplaced on Engadget.

FCC: All Programming To Be Broadcast In ADHDTV By 2007

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/42809

[Bob Atkinson @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:24AM]

mmmmm.... really crude Photoshop fake ...

- BA

[JC @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:36AM]

Does it take much practice to state the obvious, or are you born with that skill?

[fistpittingnork @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:56AM]

Which part is photoshopped? His haircut? His PJs? That black leather couch? Surely you're not referring to that Roger Rabbit-esque sousaphone?

[Andy M @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:28AM]

OMG- just the sight of that guy looking so pathetically disappointed
while playing his Sousaphone! Yeah, so it's a spoof but I'm still laughing so
hard I can't stop- tears running down my face as I'm typing this...
Everytime I go back and look at the shot,
I start laughing uncontrollably all over again... oh God make it
stop!!!

[Ellianth @ Aug 2nd 2007 11:23AM]

i have to agree. That's the best fake disappointment photo I've ever seen. That guy deserves an award.

[evan @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:34AM]

Haha, $345, 52 copies? Pwned by the Onion.

[Grant @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:44AM]

that might just be some of the onions finest work. lol

[Jrock @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:49AM]

There are two types of people in this world: Those who realize the Onion is satire and complete morons.

[Nick @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:40AM]

very true.

[Tim @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:51AM]

Superb. I've not laughed so much in ages. Photo was great too. Clearly brad is the beta version of the humour robot that was published earlier. YOU WILL GET THERE BRAD.

[Todd @ Aug 2nd 2007 9:53AM]

Sousaphone Hero may not be meeting it expectations, but I hear that Zydeco Hero: Ragin' Cajin' Edition is flying off the shelves.

http://zydecobrothers.com/Zydeco_Brothers_2005_r100.jpg

[TazManiac @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:01AM]

I was looking forward to Tambourine Hero...

[Marika @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:13AM]

I guess this means French horn hero won't be coming out either...damn.

[strider_mt2k @ Aug 2nd 2007 12:42PM]

I honestly don't know which is funnier, The Onion's article, or the WILDLY misplaced venom in the comments here!

-Photoshop?
-Misplaced?
-Engadget gone down a notch?

Please pick up your clue when convenient folks.

-"French Horn Hero" I have to single out because as a former French Horn player of about three months it's the first thing I thought of too, and since I also thought of it it makes it quite clever.

However the rest of these comments are HILARIOUS in their idiocy!

It's The Onion, you dim bulbs!


Look Engadget, it's probably just a bad day or something. I can't account for so many people simply not getting it. Really, it's okay.

[CJ @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:33AM]

There's just no love for the venerable mouth harp in the room.

You do know that Mouth Harp Hero is in alpha testing now. They're having a little bit of trouble, something about electrical grounding and some testers getting shocked in the teeth, something like that, but I'm sure they'll get it cleared up right quick.

[fistpittingnork @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:42AM]

Bookshelf in the background, 4th shelf down from the top.

What exactly is that statue doing?

[dee-dee-deetarded @ Aug 2nd 2007 5:47PM]

yeah and what kind of pirated movies are on that dvd rack on the left? ? ?

[Sean P. Aune @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:43AM]

Speaking as one of the few, proud, sousaphone players... okay I was the only one... in my high school...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA

Man... I would have KILLED for mine to look like that one! I only had a boring white one! *pout*

[koopa @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:43AM]

Anger, frustration, confusion, denial, shock ... these are all words that can be used to describe the emotional state felt by the gamer community after Activison went from officially announcing a price drop on the much touted Ukulele Hero, to essentially making it all a moot point by Friday because the Ukulele Hero is being discontinued. Newsweek's N'Gai Croal was seen sneaking his very own UH into a cab at E3.

[Paul Barrett @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:46AM]

SouSaMaPhoooooone

The Onion triumphs once again

[Eric Law @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:51AM]

If I wanted regurgitated humor, I'd have visited some other site than engadget.

[John @ Aug 2nd 2007 11:36AM]

Seeing as how this is a blog related to all-things-gadgetry and that Guitar Hero has been an incredibly popular music game, the "regurgitated humor" you speak of is certainly allowed here. Many, many items posted on these pages come from other websites, that we may or may not have seen on our own.

Besides, why the hell do you care so much? It's not YOUR blog. If you don't like it, don't read it.

[kyle allen @ Aug 2nd 2007 3:20PM]

eric's face is about to be regurgitated if he doesn't shut up!...nvm that would be gross

[Icron @ Aug 2nd 2007 10:57AM]

How can I pre-order one of these bad boys?!

[Mike @ Aug 2nd 2007 11:16AM]

I totally made a wiki last week for Orchestra Hero. Comes packaged with 70 instruments...

http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Orchestra_hero&diff=148059107&oldid=148059044

[John @ Aug 2nd 2007 11:41AM]

...and that is a prime example of why Wikipedia takes a pounding when it comes to credibility.

The idea of an Orchestra Hero is funny, though I don't think it belongs on Wiki.

[Mike @ Aug 2nd 2007 11:45AM]

Gotta give wikipedia props, it was taken down within 30 seconds of me posting it, this is just in the history page.

[jwtrooper @ Aug 2nd 2007 12:33PM]

I agree with John... Don't vandalize Wikipedia.

[JC @ Aug 2nd 2007 11:39AM]

Skin Flute Hero anyone?

[lankysob @ Aug 2nd 2007 11:49AM]

I've been playing that in Career Mode since I was 12.

[JC @ Aug 2nd 2007 11:57AM]

You win one million points for making me squirt water out my nose. Well played, sir.

[Riley @ Aug 3rd 2007 12:13AM]

eewww.....

[db @ Aug 2nd 2007 12:09PM]

Fools. Save this for April 1st.

[mrChin @ Aug 2nd 2007 12:27PM]

At least they're porting Harmonica Hero to the PSP! Ocarina Hero was crap though.

[johnzilla @ Aug 2nd 2007 12:40PM]

C'mon guys...it was funny but not THAT funny.

Now, THIS is funny:

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/after_5_years_in_u_s_terrorist

[strider_mt2k @ Aug 2nd 2007 12:44PM]

That IS funny!

[Magallanes @ Aug 2nd 2007 12:48PM]

I'm still waiting Polka's hero(tm).

:3