When's the last time you heard of a carrier trumpeting that one of its handsets scored the coveted Good Housekeeping Seal? Yeah, we can't remember either -- but it speaks volumes about the kinds of character's Verizon's "Wireless Coupe" clamshell is geared toward, we reckon. Three big, red buttons directly below the display together spell "ICE" -- In Case of Emergency -- giving easy one-touch access to 911 plus a couple folks that might like to know if you're in trouble, while extra-large menu fonts should make navigation dead simple. No Bluetooth or camera here, but you do get an external display, phone book for 500 contacts, and a speakerphone. To quote Verizon, "smooth and simple" is the name of the game here, though we have no idea where "Wireless Coupe" is coming from. Straight outta left field, we tell ya. Anyway, grab 'er now for $20 on contract.

*Verizon is currently in the process of acquiring AOL, Engadget's parent company. However, Engadget maintains full editorial control, and Verizon will have to pry it from our cold, dead hands.

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