3M's DMS800 short-throw projector-cum-alien probe

Here we have it, the black mamba of short-throw projectors: 3M's DMS800. The 0.7-inch DLP projector mounts to the wall yet throws a 1,280 x 1,024 image with a 1,300:1 contrast in sizes ranging from 50 to 85 inches thanks to that long, telescoping neck which can extend up to 4.2-feet. Inputs are available for DVI-I, D-Sub 15 RGB, component, composite and S-Video sources. You can even combine the built-in Ethernet with an optional, external sensor and you've got yourself a digital white board to share on the network. The entire kit will set you back ¥715,000 (about $6,292) as of today in Japan. Still confused? Click through for a sample installation.

[Via Impress]

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:02AM]

Anyone else thinking that it sort of looks like a.... you know

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:05AM]

looks like a penis. seriously.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:12AM]

Hence spelling the word 'come', 'cum'.

[Ellianth Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:15AM]

meh, i've seen bigger.

Does anyone else have the urge to rub their hand up and down that shaft over and over? Or maybe just to touch it? (i'm not a pervert, honest!!)

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:16AM]

'cum' is latin you filthy perv! :)

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 10:40AM]

So, I've "latined" all over my girlfriend's face.

Did I use it correctly?!

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 11:25AM]

What the heck! That thing looks like some sort of Alien Peni**, oops... ah... I mean a Probe!

:D

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 3:10PM]

I wonder - does it vibrate too? by the fan?

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 6:23PM]

Judging from the shape of the head I’d say this thing is definitely Kosher for Passover. If you know what I mean …

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:06AM]

it looks like the designers of that thing watch too much hentai....

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:03AM]

they do know what that looks like right?

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:05AM]

I love how in the shot, they even put two orbs below the member haha.

[Denver80203 Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:28AM]

conveniently forgot to paint in the shadows her arm would be casting.

I certainly couldn't stand up there with a straight face

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:50AM]

Feh! The light from sun is blocking out the shadow ;-)

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 1:32PM]

This pretty muck looks like a (beep) for me ;-)

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:10AM]

i really don't get the title ... i see the alien probe, but i don't see the cum in it at all (?)

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:07AM]

From the look of the thing, it might also be an alien cum probe

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:07AM]

coffee out of the nose with that observation.. damnit...

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:08AM]

You have to put ice on it to make it retract

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 10:15AM]

LOL! Love all the comments...

I read up on this in a Grand and Toy catalog already...

Apparently on a new installation the presentation mode only lasts two minutes. With age, this time limit increases.

There were numerous complaints in testing that before the presenter reaches the conclusion, it automatically retracts, and goes into sleep mode.

Currently only a "work-around" is available. After entering sleep mode and waiting fifteen minutes, the presenter can manually manipulate it to complete the presentation.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:12AM]

Anyone else see the Earth and sun as testicles?

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:16AM]

Yep. Chris Vendemio did; 4th comment down.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:22AM]

I see. Maybe if the current users thing worked I wouldn't have to wait for my email to get the comments to appear.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:10AM]

They should name it the "Strap-On", as in strap it onto the wall, of course.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:11AM]

that thing is just weird

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:14AM]

Here is a video of it in action:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5w_DqhpMuFY

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:17AM]

Projector-cum alien probe -- or projecting alien cum probe?

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:18AM]

Man that looks like a robot penis :)

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:26AM]

And the prize for the most original comment goes to....

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:26AM]

the video is even better
http://www.mmm.co.jp/vsd/media_systems/DMS_800_kiosk.html

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:30AM]

do you think it 'extends' automatically?

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:29AM]

this has got to be a joke...who the hell would design something that looks like that?

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:31AM]

"to meet the demands of ever changing requirements in a classroom ..."

haha, yeah I would love to see one of these in a 10th grade classroom .. it would be a butt of jokes (pun intended)

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 3:44PM]

My junior school was actually the first school in the nation to get these put into every single classroom. The other schools in the district are already having some installed.

[Roberini Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:32AM]

This thing has got to be a joke.
I don't see anyone walking next to this thing and brag about it.
This is definitely designed to come up with an endless amount of jokes.

[2late2die Posted Sep 10th 2007 9:39AM]

I don't understand, why is only the left ball shaved?! :D

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 20th 2007 6:37AM]

I feel envious and I dont know why.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 10:04AM]

All of the obvious comments have already been made, so I'm going to go a different route. Why the fuck are the Earth & Sun the same size?!?!

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 10:15AM]

If the presenter is not a girl... will it work?

[daaper Posted Sep 10th 2007 10:16AM]

After you've had a professional mount it, you'll have the most well-hung projector in the office.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 10:17AM]

Clockwork Orange anyone?

[Miguel Lancaster Posted Sep 10th 2007 10:32AM]

appropriate usage of 'cum' for such a phallic projector

[poet Posted Sep 10th 2007 10:38AM]

If I could afford it I'ld take one. Those jokes will get boring soon enough and then it's a pretty sweet device.

Anyway, much more tacky than the "organic" design is the "photoshop" video.
I'ld expect a big company to make a much more professional looking video, this almost looks like a homebrew fake, but due to the boring voice over it must be legit ;)

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 11:06AM]

In real life, they don't look too bad. I've seen one used with a smart board. Works well in places you don't want, or can't hang it from the ceiling.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 11:18AM]

...Make sure you are healthy enough to use the project or, if use continues for more than 4 hours contact a technical support professional, if the screen becomes blue-tinted contact a technical support professional...

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 11:25AM]

I am feeling a bit devious today. Hum... I wonder what I can do for a gag... I KNOW!!!

I am going email this link to all of my lady friends and *co-workers* asking them what do they think of this new product? Lets see how many angry replys I get back, or how many replys I get back with a Happy Face!

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 11:31AM]

You should see the dust cover for this thing.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 11:42AM]

Didn't they do this -perfectly- like 3 years ago? http://solutions.3m.com/wps/portal/3M/en_US/Meetings/Home/Solutions/Product_Catalog/Digital_Wall_Display/

What the hell were they thinking making it all bulbous and phallic? Can you imagine that over your least favorite teacher's head?

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 12:21PM]

The fact that she's pointing with two fingers in the photo only adds to the hilarity of this entire post. Thank you, Engadget.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 12:36PM]

The crafty presenter will use a small mesh bag to keep pens in,hanging them from the base of the shaft. The cover will also be made of clear latex,lubricated with oil to help keep the lens clean.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 1:00PM]

avertisement:
Do you have erectile lens disfunction? Click here.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 1:59PM]

I for one welcome our projecting penis overloads!!!

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 2:29PM]

The only projector that allows you to view presentations internally.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 6:50PM]

And the CEDIA Design award goes to...

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 6:57PM]

One must admit though, its unique appearance and the ensuing discussions/jokes definitely make it more memorable. This is a great form of advertising, one of the reasons they chose to make it so much more realistic than a squarish, angular type projector.

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 10th 2007 7:10PM]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!!

[Generic Posted Sep 11th 2007 5:11PM]

it should be called "the porn projector"

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 13th 2007 10:23PM]

To the idiot that thinks this thing is Kosher: Listen up schmuck- - -everyone knows you can't "beef" or "chicken" your girlfriend/wife/mother!! (OK, maybe YOUR mother!)

[(Unverified) Posted Sep 14th 2007 11:58AM]

All I want to know is if every presentation has a "Happy Ending".

If so, I'm chosing my seat carefully...