Body-scanning chair to show UK prisoners who's BOSS

Not nearly as intrusive as it first sounds, the Body Orifice Security Scanner (BOSS) is a chair-shaped mobile metal detector that officials are considering installing in every prison in England and Wales. Designed mainly to weed out one of the most popular forms of contraband -- cellphones -- the new BOSS II is said to be sensitive enough to detect even a single SIM card being smuggled somewhere inside an individual. So far the two £6,500 ($12,900) chairs that have been used at the Woodhill jail in Milton Keynes since April have helped authorities seize 21 handsets, with inmates who trigger an alert segregated and swiped down by a metal detector every time they leave their cells until the metal object has been, um, passed. While this system does humanely do away with uncomfortable cavity searches, those poor souls with a knee replacement, a bit of shrapnel embedded in their hip, or the like seem destined to toil away in solitary confinement for eternity.

[Via SlashGear]

[Lotzosushi. @ Dec 24th 2007 3:57PM]

Uhhh....allllright then.

[Flashpoint @ Dec 25th 2007 10:40AM]

In places where cellphones are prohibited...WHY NO TJUST SET UP JAMMING DEVICES? They only costs $200 each.

[Wwhat @ Dec 26th 2007 4:04PM]

They thought about it but the law in britain won't allow it, jams emergency calls too in the area.

Here's another question, how about glass partitions so people can't shove things in eachother's ass..

[Jack @ Dec 27th 2007 4:33PM]

Waste of tax payers money

[Matt @ Dec 24th 2007 4:24PM]

so what makes this any better to what the airports use???

[Ethan @ Dec 24th 2007 4:34PM]

You get to sit down!

As to the shrapnel thing, wouldn't medical records sort that out?

[Ricardo @ Dec 24th 2007 4:54PM]

That's definately the weirdest name I have ever seen on a gadget.

[zzz @ Dec 24th 2007 5:47PM]

I love it how body orifice in the newspaper article is an euphemism for an ass. Cute.

Imagine such a dirty talk: Lie down bitch, I'm gonna fuck you in your body orifice!

Naughty stuff.

[derX @ Dec 24th 2007 7:43PM]

That is not dirty talk.

That is, however, how I would imagine a sex assault (no pun intended with 'ass'ualt) would begin.

[zzz @ Dec 24th 2007 8:37PM]

I'm going to trust your judgement here derX because hey, what the hell do I know about sexual assaults?

[derX @ Dec 24th 2007 11:36PM]

One: LOL Well-played.
*hat is off*

Two: C'mon, we all watch Law and Order: SVU.

[Jonathan-DBOSS @ Dec 24th 2007 6:09PM]

DBOSS!

[allaun @ Dec 24th 2007 8:14PM]

It reminds me of the chair in face off. :D

[RedBull Runner @ Dec 24th 2007 7:04PM]

Why does it look like something out of an arcade? Weird though.

[MikeG @ Dec 24th 2007 7:35PM]

It even looks like it has a slot for coins on it's left hand side :D

[Bobs @ Dec 24th 2007 8:31PM]

With a name like Ranger and BOSS, id expect it to be some kind of exotic sex toy or portable violator, but it has no moving parts, and it cant go and seek for the SIM cards, so i guess its just an electronic chair shaped SIM card finder.

[Gronk @ Dec 24th 2007 10:14PM]

Um... why not just jam cell transmissions throughout the prison?

[Jeremy W @ Dec 25th 2007 12:14AM]

What about the guards and other prison employees who need to use cell phones?

[Yours Smugly @ Dec 25th 2007 8:16AM]

Lame, and late. Steve Ballmer and his office chairs already show people who's the boss.

[docca @ Dec 25th 2007 11:34AM]

I seriously thought this was some sort of guitar accessory from BOSS. Even the logo looks the same.

Perhaps a chair for decrepit guitar heroes, complete with a rack for guitar pedals?