Out of control satellite "weeks" away from slamming into Earth

Good news, everyone! According to reports, a US spy satellite which has lost power and propulsion is weeks or even months away from striking Earth. Officials say that the space junk -- which can now no longer be controlled and could contain hazardous materials -- is due to come smashing into some location on our planet's surface, but they can't really say where. "Numerous satellites over the years have come out of orbit and fallen harmlessly. We are looking at potential options to mitigate any possible damage this satellite may cause," said Gordon Johndroe, a spokesman for the Nation Security Council. Government agencies are still considering options such as shooting down the stray equipment, though they say they'd be just as happy to let the potentially radioactive / alien-filled hunk of metal crash into a small village in a developing country.

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 4:10PM]

Good news, everyone!

Engadget Watches Futurama!

[Meltz Posted Jan 27th 2008 4:27PM]

My bad, didn't care to read the second page of comments first....good job

[Meltz Posted Jan 27th 2008 4:26PM]

man, did no one else get the Futurama reference??

[derX Posted Jan 27th 2008 4:53PM]

.....I hope that was a really crappy joke.

--------------

Nothing personal but please do the world a favor and never touch a keyboard again--and by keyboard, I mean find no way to communicate with the world at large.

If you feel an urge to do so, don't.

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 5:18PM]

Perhaps the Chinese can strike it down? http://www.globalsecurity.org/space/library/news/2007/space-070123-rferl01.htm

[OddManOut Posted Jan 27th 2008 5:39PM]

Let's just have China shoot it down. They've been itching to "get their gun off" with those new anti-satellite missiles of theirs anyway. This way we'll know if they are actually effective against our satellites (they've only been tested on derelict Chinese satellites thus far...).

Heck...lets charge them a billion dollars for the privilege and take a bite out of the substantial trade debt we have with them...

We could even do it carney barker style...

"Step right up! Step right up! Be the first! That's right...pop the satellite and win a brand new Hummer H2! One Billion dollers buys you three chances at a brand new Hummer folks! Don't be shy folks...Left foot...right foot...the body follows, they call it 'WALKING' ! Step right up!"

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 5:42PM]

This thing is not that big, most of it will be burned up on re-entry.
When Skylab (Gigantic in comparison) came down many years ago some of it landed in Australia.
The Australian government filed a suit against the US for "littering".
That's how serious this is! (The claim, to date, has not been settled).

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 5:43PM]

Hopefully it will crash into a certain ranch in texas. :-)

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 6:44PM]

You live in Texas?

[foxdude333 Posted Jan 27th 2008 6:16PM]

As Peppy Hare once wisely told us, DO A BARREL ROLL!

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 6:33PM]

Hmm, maybe that Golf Ball that's currently orbiting the Earth hit it... :P

Is the US too cheap to fire up that multi-billion dollar laser-modified Boeing 747 to just vapourise the satellite on re-entry?

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 7:11PM]

blame canada!

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 7:01PM]

"could contain hazardous materials" = some type of RTG on board

don't take any souvenirs home!

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 7:05PM]

Satellites don't concern me. I have a pet moose that will protect me.

[speculatrix Posted Jan 27th 2008 7:09PM]

so, how come they can't shoot it down with SDI?

Oh, I forgot, SDI doesn't actually work, it was really about siphoning off large amounts of tax payers money into the pockets of defense industry consultants who buy off the government!

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 29th 2008 12:57PM]

dont't forget to put on your tin-foil hat!

http://www.google.com/search?q=f-15+asat&sourceid=navclient-ff&ie=UTF-8&rlz=1B3GGGL_enUS237US237

[Jamus Posted Jan 27th 2008 7:17PM]

damn. M already beat me to the Cloverfield joke....

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 7:55PM]

Where's the Starwars technology we've been hearing about for the last decade+?

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 8:23PM]

"The satellite is going to awaken the monster and we're going to have a real live Cloverfield on our hands.."

I bet this is just a paid advert for the film, disguised as an article! Great film, just seen it tonight on the internets.

I can see it now; this satellite hits New York and all those trendies who've just swapped MBPs for MBAs are gonna be pig sick when they try and protect their heads with their 'ultra portables'

[NHAnimator Posted Jan 27th 2008 8:31PM]

Come to Papa!

Oh, wait. It's probably going to be a huge chunk of hot metal flying at 19,000 mph.

Never mind.

[ChewChewTrain Posted Jan 27th 2008 9:20PM]

Can't they send a bunch of elderly astronauts up there to fix it?

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 27th 2008 9:24PM]

EVERYBODY PANIC!

[TombGuard Posted Jan 27th 2008 9:55PM]

Dust off that box of grid squares. I smell an ol' fashion office pool!

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 28th 2008 3:40AM]

Uh Oh.... Sounds like a job for Clint Eastwood and the Space Cowboys.

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 28th 2008 4:45AM]

My 5yr old boy saya he has been wondering a lot since he saw this news. He wonders why America can't just send Bruce Willis (Armageddon) or Will Smith (Independence Day) to take care of the problem.

He wonders why a coalition of Superman, Spiderman and the X-Men can't do something about the problem without the whole world being caused some panic.

Do I give him a straight answer or just unplug the cable tv?

[Ethan Posted Jan 28th 2008 4:57AM]

Oh, goody.

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 28th 2008 7:48AM]

Hope that third world country is the one which still has a star and possibly the odd blue stripe left on its burning flag.Just to identify the remains...

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 28th 2008 10:23AM]

Tennessee?

[(Unverified) Posted Jan 30th 2008 11:57PM]

Is't that Kosinichs ride returning? RAT W.

[(Unverified) Posted Feb 17th 2008 12:19PM]

i am scraed tat i might die and so will my family and i really want to know where this is going to hit and in one article it said that it's going to hit the north america or somthing like that.also is it going to hit san diego but also are there going to be any zombles or aliens coming? please write back.

[(Unverified) Posted Apr 12th 2008 5:31AM]

I have a awesome picture. How do I post it?