Microsoft to Yahoo: come back, this isn't over!

After a torrid moment shared in the backseat of America's largest investment firms, Yahoo decided, at the behest of friends and family, that things just wouldn't work out with Microsoft. But it isn't over. In a very heartfelt public statement today set to the backdrop of In Your Eyes, Microsoft let it be known that it's still interested in "consummating" with Yahoo, and even got a little aggressive sounding in "reserving the right to pursue all necessary steps to ensure that Yahoo!'s shareholders are provided with the opportunity to realize the value inherent in our proposal." You old sweetheart, you're shaking!

-snip--
It is unfortunate that Yahoo! has not embraced our full and fair proposal to combine our companies. Based on conversations with stakeholders of both companies, we are confident that moving forward promptly to consummate a transaction is in the best interests of all parties.


We are offering shareholders superior value and the opportunity to participate in the upside of the combined company. The combination also offers an increasingly exciting set of solutions for consumers, publishers and advertisers while becoming better positioned to compete in the online services market.


A Microsoft-Yahoo! combination will create a more effective company that would provide greater value and service to our customers. Furthermore, the combination will create a more competitive marketplace by establishing a compelling number two competitor for Internet search and online advertising.


The Yahoo! response does not change our belief in the strategic and financial merits of our proposal. As we have said previously, Microsoft reserves the right to pursue all necessary steps to ensure that Yahoo!'s shareholders are provided with the opportunity to realize the value inherent in our proposal.
--snip--

[CUBSWILLWIN @ Feb 11th 2008 6:04PM]

best pic ever!

[BrettB @ Feb 11th 2008 6:04PM]

Ditto. Laughed out loud. Luckily I'm alone.

[wrabbit @ Feb 11th 2008 6:31PM]

Indeed, that pic is pure gold.

[Ryan Trevisol @ Feb 11th 2008 6:52PM]

Monkey boy photoshops rock!

[rip @ Feb 11th 2008 7:41PM]

Agreed, best pic ever.

[Reader @ Feb 11th 2008 7:54PM]

Could do with some pit stains shopped on so that it's more realistic. It is Ballmer you know.

[Luis @ Feb 11th 2008 9:32PM]

What kind of CEO makes that facial expression?!!!

[Gilbar @ Feb 12th 2008 12:47AM]

LOL, so glad I'm not alone in thinking this is the funniest pic I've seen on here. LOLOLOL

[Arno @ Feb 11th 2008 11:40PM]

Holy crap, I scrolled right past it at first and then it went off in my head. 'Was that..' yes, yes it was! :D

Hilarious!

[Jabberwock @ Feb 11th 2008 11:42PM]

An unbelievably rich one.

[ZeroCorpse @ Feb 12th 2008 12:42AM]

Good pic, but B almer ain't that cool or classy.

You'd have had a more appropriate pic if you used the Judge
Nelson wank-in-bathroom scene from "Fast Times at Ridgemont High".

In that scenario, Yahoo is Phoebe Cates.

[whowhatme @ Feb 12th 2008 12:08PM]

good god, i think i just threw up in my mouth a little bit

[fahnboi @ Feb 11th 2008 6:04PM]

Who was it who commented the other day that it's a good time to short Y!?

[mushrooshi @ Feb 11th 2008 6:06PM]

Microsoft: I H O P nis.

[waiownsyou @ Feb 11th 2008 6:09PM]

lol @ Ballmer Photoshop

Is it just me or does anyone else think it's a conspiracy to help raise Yahoo!'s stock prices? Look at Yahoo!'s stock prices compared to Google and you'll see my point.

[blueadept1 @ Feb 11th 2008 8:14PM]

Never compare stock prices in valuing companies. A stock price is a derivative of a company's total value as determined by the market. I can have company with one share priced at $100,000,000 or a company with 100,000,000 shares priced at $1. There is no difference. So while Google's share price of $521.16 compared to Yahoo's share price of $29.87 appears that Google is 17 times larger, in actual fact, according to market capitalization, Google is worth $163.04 billion and Yahoo is worth $39.92 billion - or 1/4 the size.

Unless Yahoo is having problems finding investments (not likely) and Microsoft wishes to drive down Google vicariously through Yahoo, I doubt that this strategy would yield any benefits for Microsoft.

[Todd @ Feb 11th 2008 6:09PM]

Not over yet, but it is NOT a foregone conclusion that Microsoft can succeed in a hostile take over. Way too many anti-trust and predatory practice skeletons in Microsoft’s closet. Federal judges here and in the EU love to rule against the Galactic Empire.

Fight Yahoo, fight!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9BosxTWZE4

[painty @ Feb 11th 2008 6:11PM]

Microsoft to Yahoo: i'll only hurt you cuz i love you so much

[mushrooshi @ Feb 11th 2008 6:14PM]

Love isn't Abuse!

Lulz, we watched this really stupid "dating abuse" video in homeroom. Homeroom is useless, all we do is learn how to barely pass standardized tests and barely pass classes.

"OH MY GAWSH! MY BOYFRIEND RAPED ME 4 TIMES BUT I STILL LOVE HIM!"

[brian welch @ Feb 11th 2008 6:14PM]

That pic is perfect, I love it.

[Guillermo @ Feb 11th 2008 6:16PM]

No to MSHOO!!!

[john @ Feb 11th 2008 6:35PM]

Is that pronounced "mushu"? Like "mushu pork"? :-)

[Whale Biologist @ Feb 12th 2008 12:02AM]

No, it's "Mushu", as in "Mushu, the whale who thinks he's better than you!"

[John @ Feb 11th 2008 6:17PM]

If I had any decent sized stake in Yahoo, I would be desperately trying to see this deal go through.

[john @ Feb 11th 2008 6:33PM]

If I had a sizeable stake in yahoo, I'd be doing everything I could to prevent the deal from going through.

[JLTate @ Feb 11th 2008 7:24PM]

@john

Then you'd be doing everything you could to lose money. The stock price jumped about 50% when Microsoft announced the $44.6 billion bid at the start of this month. Gee, I wonder why.

[Andir3.0 @ Feb 11th 2008 9:22PM]

Ignorance? Why would Yahoo want to join up with a company that's gone from $60billion in cash reserves to less than $25 billion in only a few years, and losing consumer confidence according to the stock charts.

[Andir3.0 @ Feb 11th 2008 9:23PM]

Let alone, join with a company that just wiped out it's entire cash holdings on one deal...

[mushrooshi @ Feb 11th 2008 6:17PM]

Ballmer: "to emphasise the competitive threat, and in some senses the competitive opportunity, that Linux represents. Linux is a tough competitor. There's no company called Linux, there's barely a Linux road map. Yet Linux sort of springs organically from the earth. And it had, you know, the characteristics of communism that people love so very, very much about it. That is, it's free. [Outlook Express is free, and also sometimes lets strangers share your hard disk - is this anarchism? - Ed] And I'm not trying to make fun of it, because it's a real competitive issue. Today, I would say, we still don't see a lot of Linux competition in most quarters on the desktop, and we see a lot of Linux competition in some server markets. And we could either say, hey, Linux is going to roll over the world, but I don't see that happening. That's not what's going on right now."

Yea... I am not letting his grubby hands get on Yahoo.

Hes gonna make it only windows compatible.

"In order to view this content Please use Internet Exploror 7 or Later"

[fahnboi @ Feb 11th 2008 6:30PM]

did Ballmer really say all that? i'd hate to be a MS employee with a drooling fucktard like that at the helm. bill gates is looking better every day...

[fahnboi @ Feb 11th 2008 7:01PM]

wait i'm not finished. the money quote is clearly: "And it had, you know, the characteristics of communism that people love so very, very much about it.". ok, who else wanna bet that ole' steve-o has a golden-framed picture of Joseph McCarthy hanging in his marble tea room? memo to ballsmer: Linux is trying to steal your precious bodily fluids!

[JLTate @ Feb 11th 2008 7:34PM]

I fail to see what's so terrible evil about his statements.

[thethirdmoose @ Feb 11th 2008 9:32PM]

NOOOO NOT INTERNET EXPLODER

-CAPS LOCK IS CROOZ CONTROL FO COOL, YO!-

[Primoz @ Feb 11th 2008 6:18PM]

Microsoft looks desperate here... Worlds biggest and reaches research center and that's the best they can come with? Shame on you!

[jbhitter24 @ Feb 11th 2008 6:22PM]

yahoo, you're dumb.

[George B. Romero @ Feb 11th 2008 6:29PM]

ROFL. Even though I know its a nice photoshop...somehow I believe that in his wildest imagination, Steve Balmer may actually be doing this picture justice:)

[Isaac @ Feb 11th 2008 6:30PM]

Oh yeah, I possibly the only thing entertaining about the stock market about to happen: Hostile Takeover. Its one of the most fun things to watch that has to do with wall street. Well, besides the movie. Ahh, Gordon Gekko. We hardly knew yee.

[Warren @ Feb 11th 2008 6:30PM]

Maybe...just maybe...if Yahoo! and/or Microsoft actually listened to its customers and offered innovative solutions/products and opened things up so that its compatible for all [windows, linux, mac] and stop trying to just copy what everyone else is doing then maybe Google wouldn't be such a problem....

But hey - I'm no Ballmer...

[Greg @ Feb 11th 2008 6:40PM]

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AjlcX7GKFVg66tf5VsVyRAXsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20080201065450AA2ZBgv
Heh I made that the first time MS made an offer.

[Fred @ Feb 11th 2008 6:41PM]

They gave him a pen? They must think he's a dick!

[fahnboi @ Feb 11th 2008 7:04PM]

care to explain that joke for us simpletons?

[Fred @ Feb 11th 2008 8:15PM]

It's a Say Anything reference. That's where the picture was from? Classic 80's movies for $1000.

[Marius Dima @ Feb 11th 2008 6:41PM]

LoVE @ first byte that is ! :))
I hope it will be I DO at the valentines

[MasterCKO @ Feb 11th 2008 6:49PM]

*pops popcorn*
*pulls up a seat*

This takeover is going to be quite a sight. Keep your eyes peeled, folks.

[Blaktornado @ Feb 11th 2008 7:17PM]

Microsoft, on behalf of Yahoo I kindly say FUCK OFF.

[Rob @ Feb 11th 2008 8:30PM]

Are you stupid? Or just emotional about Yahoo circa 1995. Guess what? It is over for them. What Yahoo is going to pull out of it's 7(!) year tailspin and suddenly regain search share? I can tell you as a Yahoo shareholder I say please buy this dog!

Btw, I only bought the stock based on the probablity of a takeover. Those kinds of trades can be pretty speculative but it was clear something was going to happen to them and it wasn't going to happen by Jerry Yang being put back in charge.

[Timothy Sottek @ Feb 11th 2008 7:48PM]

Microsoft: You will be baked.

Yahoo: What?

Microsoft: We would like to ensure your stockholders that our previous statement on baking was related solely to the cake you will receive as part of our full and fair proposal.

[Brooks @ Feb 11th 2008 7:59PM]

Yahoo!: The cake is a lie.

[tekdroid @ Feb 11th 2008 7:49PM]

Yoogle rolls off the tongue better.
Ballmer is my hero.

[engadget @ Feb 11th 2008 7:59PM]

As MS employees are preoccupied with this Yahoo takeover, Apple will roll out a 3G high memory iPhone and Google will roll out adequate updates to Gears...

I remember Bill G once talking about what he fears - and that's how easy it is for some company to come along and replace MS. What's shocking is - is how fast that will come to be real...