Top ten things to do with your now-defunct HD DVD player

Finally, HD DVD users now have the empirical evidence they've been looking for to prove that the universe really is conspiring against them. We figured we'd make ourselves useful over here and give you a list of things you can do with your poor, obsolete HD DVD player -- starting with taking it out to dinner, excusing yourself to the bathroom before the check comes... then getting the hell out of there.

Gimmes

• eBay
• Doorstop
• Entertainment center cup-holder
• Destroy it. Office Space style.

Oh, the humanity

1. Mail it to the office of Howard Stringer in protest of Blu-ray's victory.
2. Plug it into your clothes dryer's 240-volt outlet. Woops, honey! My bad, guess we have to buy a Blu-ray player now.
3. Finally, replace your Betamax player.
4. Buy the Blu-ray player of your choice, put it in the box, attempt to return it as "defective."
5. Channel it through Whoopi Goldberg and make some pottery with it.
6. Put a Blu-ray disc in the tray and then call up Toshiba when it doesn't work. Repeatedly.
7. Put it in a time capsule, just to confuse future generations.
8. Buy a few dozen of 'em and build a little hut for your Blu-ray player.
9. Lock it alone in a room with a few lethal weapons... let it die honorably.
10. Use it to upscale DVDs, which is all you ever used it for anyways.

Of course, feel free to leave your own suggestions in comments.

[Homeboy @ Feb 19th 2008 12:08PM]

Will it blend?

[Lazerface @ Feb 19th 2008 1:08PM]

if theres a big enough blender for it

I think someone needs to hack/mod one so it will play doom

[Jared @ Feb 19th 2008 1:47PM]

No it wont blend. didn't you read blenders stopped supporting hd dvd last week too

[Drew @ Feb 19th 2008 11:12PM]

No it won't... ok?
Jees... that joke is about as finished as HD DVD itself...

[Anthony @ Feb 19th 2008 12:08PM]

I'm planning a "speed dating" service & hope to hook it up w/ my friend's laser disc player so that together they create the ultimate useless disc machine.

[Matsu @ Feb 19th 2008 12:11PM]

Hook it up with a Betamax and make a 3some.

[EddieW @ Feb 19th 2008 1:46PM]

Ultimate useless disc machine.. ..

I will throw in the mini disc deck!!!

[ssuk @ Feb 19th 2008 1:57PM]

A Betamax? Dude, that's like your teenage sister hooking up with an 80 year old man.

[ZeroCorpse @ Feb 19th 2008 4:29PM]

CED (Capacitance Electronic Disc) is ALREADY the ultimate useless disc format. Short life, killed in 1986, and played by a technology not unlike a record player, with a stylus and everything.

You may also know them as Videodisc. They sucked.

[teej @ Feb 20th 2008 6:49PM]

you forgot UMD, the true Useless Media Disc.

[ZworT @ Feb 19th 2008 12:08PM]

Jerks

[shaun @ Feb 19th 2008 12:40PM]

Sorry Mr.Toshiba, didn't realise you commented here

[Sarcasticone @ Feb 19th 2008 6:19PM]

What's HD DVD? Who killed him?

[Kamokazi @ Feb 19th 2008 12:08PM]

Or I could keep it, since I was smart enough to buy one that played BR too.

[Brad @ Feb 19th 2008 12:23PM]

... and spent way too much for what is essentially now just a plain BR player. Epic fail!

[Kamokazi @ Feb 19th 2008 12:29PM]

$279...LG combo drive in my HTPC. Only an extra $80-100 over a standalone BR player. Well worth the 4 months of watching Last Samurai, Star Trek, Transformers, etc. And it will still work tomorrow, and next year, and I won't have to re-purchase the ~15 HD DVDs I bought (counting the Trek collection as one). I don't think that's an 'epic fail'. Buying either format 1-2 years ago when they first came out sure as hell would have been though.

[Kamokazi @ Feb 19th 2008 12:30PM]

Err, by standalone I meant BR only drive, not an actual standalone unit (that would be more expensive).

[striggity @ Feb 19th 2008 12:37PM]

score one for Brad!

[CUBSWILLWIN @ Feb 19th 2008 3:56PM]

#4 is the way I go!

[richbum @ Feb 21st 2008 4:49AM]

LOL. +1 for brad. EPIC FAIL!

[Frank @ Feb 19th 2008 12:10PM]

Slow news day over there at Engadget, huh?

[Jeff Lewis @ Feb 19th 2008 1:42PM]

Well, at least they've found something other than the MacBook Air and Apple's website being shut down for updates to obsess over.

Hmmm I wonder if Apple supported BluRay? :)

[Andrew @ Feb 19th 2008 2:28PM]

SLOW? If this is a slow news day - with a final resolution to a major gadget issue plus the fallout (Universal and Paramount to release Blu Ray etc.) - what would you call a BIG news days?

[Andir3.0 @ Feb 19th 2008 2:36PM]

Yes, Apple was in the BD camp.

[Blackster @ Feb 19th 2008 12:11PM]

ryan you might have enough cash to stock in all players that are available, but i guess there are some that aren't that lucky and are angry about it ;)

[glenjay @ Feb 19th 2008 12:23PM]

Please accompany me to the sense of humor aisle, we have a wide selection...

[Blackster @ Feb 19th 2008 12:30PM]

i'd say you mean sarcasm. right? ;) :-p

[Ahmed Alzayani @ Feb 19th 2008 12:36PM]

Ok, don’t tell me that there is someone out there who’s purchased HD-DVD player without knowing about the format war, they knew that one of them will losses eventually. It not Toshiba/Sony fault.

[The Angry Intern @ Feb 19th 2008 12:12PM]

If I had one, i would just keep it. Not like it's going to magically stop working

[BigDaddyM @ Feb 19th 2008 12:56PM]

Correct, there is nothing wrong with your HD DVD player. Mine will still work an dI will buy HD DVD movie on teh cheap soon.

I happen to have both HD DVD and Blu-Ray. I like HD DVD more, but that is the way the cookie crumbles.

[Neeko @ Feb 19th 2008 2:23PM]

HAHA FUNNY. Heres an option how about i use it to play all the HD DVD movies that arent on BLU RAY.. It still works people...Just as good as its Blue cousin.. You guys at E must be really bored with the tech news today. Sitting up there preaching about how HD DVD is dead. Theres still plenty of media to be watched and or recorded.


GEEZ. OK IAM DONE...PEACE IAM OUT.. THE 10:00 SHOW IS NOTHING LIKE THE 7..

[Harlo @ Feb 19th 2008 2:43PM]

Nothing against Engadget, but their loyalty did seem to shift between "we don't care who wins" to "ohhhhhh burn HD DVD" right about the time Warner Bros did... hmmmm.

But yeah, I didn't go buck wild buying discs, but the few I do own will continue to play till the player dies so no need to burn it all down.

Disclaimer: This line of logic is not endorsed by Engadget or its parent company AOL Time-Warner.

[Ryan Block @ Feb 19th 2008 4:12PM]

Harlo, naw, we're just glad the format war is over. If Sony lost we'd have done the exact same post, just switch HD DVD with Blu-ray, etc.

[Kiwi616 @ Feb 19th 2008 12:12PM]

OR keep on using it as it STILL really does play the HD-DVDs you bought (of course until you replace them with another format).

Proud PS3 owner.

[Tim @ Feb 19th 2008 12:16PM]

Or not replace them and buy an Xbox360 HD-DVD drive on ebay for $30 in a few months and rip them to your media server.

[Dr. Kenneth Noisewater @ Feb 19th 2008 1:43PM]

Meh, I think I will get an XBox HDDVD attachment and rip exclusively Warner Bros HDDVDs for torrenting, those backstabbing tuckfards.

[BCre8v @ Feb 19th 2008 12:12PM]

Um no, Mr. Samurai.
Your reflexes were not quick enough and your attempt at posting was not witty enough. Good bye.

[Dankoozy @ Feb 19th 2008 12:13PM]

You know in ~10-20 years time all the nerds / collectors will want one of those old-skool HD-DVD things. much like laserdisc and that. so grab them while you can

will the death of HD-DVD affect HD DVD-RAM at all? like a lot of blu-ray drives will write ordinary DVD-RAMs so maybe they can be upgraded

[ericdano @ Feb 19th 2008 12:15PM]

No, they won't. LaserDisc had Tens of Thousands of titles on them, if not more. HD DVD.......maybe a thousand?

[ericdano @ Feb 19th 2008 12:13PM]

Just one thing you should do with it....

See if it WILL BLEND!

[NHAnimator @ Feb 19th 2008 12:13PM]

Gonna try sticking in some old Circuit City Divx discs. Hey, who knows?

[Aguiluz @ Feb 19th 2008 3:15PM]

DivX the video format?

Oh, wait, you meant DIVX.

[Ed @ Feb 19th 2008 3:36PM]

Maybe gabe and tycho will get a new buddy...

[jason w @ Feb 19th 2008 12:15PM]

Its sh*t like this that makes me prefer hddvd. Damn Ryan go back to telling the world why the game cube rocks at your local EB games.

[Scott @ Feb 19th 2008 7:19PM]

I'm just gonna go out and buy every HD-DVD I can. I mean the 360 attachment will still play HD-DVDs, so it's not a complete loss. Why not pay 1/3 price for HD movies? Brilliant

[MadMike @ Feb 19th 2008 12:15PM]

It makes a great upscaling DVD player. Would work perfect for that 19" 720p LCD I have in my bedroom.

[Saturn @ Feb 19th 2008 2:17PM]

great idea.

i will wait till people get desperate about their players and buy one for me.

[Thunderbuck @ Feb 19th 2008 5:40PM]

720p on your bedroom tv?

How well does porn upscale, anyway?

[Jeremy K. @ Feb 19th 2008 12:15PM]

lol 4, 6 and 7 are the best.

[Jon Doe. @ Feb 19th 2008 12:18PM]

OR just use it as another media player in your home theatre *rolls eyes* Wow you guys are pricks. So I guess my VHS player is a boat anchor because its still sitting in my home theatre because of the handful of movies that aren't on DVD.
I'm going to pick up ever HD DVD I can on the cheap and put it in my collection. Then pick up a 360 HD DVD player when they drop below 100 so I can watch it on the go....But I guess its easier to kick a platform in the teeth then admit that its perfectly viable for playback until you want to start lending out movies to your friends...that would be an issue.
Fanbois....I wish they would all up and die. The world doesn't need people so fanatical about consumer products.