Copulare's $2,350 iCoral iPod dock is just as absurd as you think

To be honest, JVC's P-Series LCD line may still hold the crown for most expensive iPod dock, but at least it comes with an expansive 1080p panel, right? Pushing aside a number of a worthy opponents on its charge to most absurd / unnecessary iPod dock evar, the iCoral supposedly features a top plate constructed from artificial coral and is proudly decorated with a "very artistic design" (Copulare's words, not ours). 'Round back, you'll find USB, S-Video and stereo analog outputs, but we're simply not seeing the slit in which your currency of choice comes out of at the press of a button. Due to that unfortunate omission, we're suggesting you hold tight to your €1,500 ($2,355) -- unless you're one David Beckham, of course.

[Via UberReview]

[TomWBrowning @ Apr 7th 2008 4:32PM]

That 'very artistic design' is very printed off-centre.

[andyo @ Apr 7th 2008 6:05PM]

And the very artistic photography is all over the place. One would think these artists would have a camera with at least an "M" in the dial, and know about a little thing called exposure.

[Shadowise @ Apr 7th 2008 4:33PM]

So the use of Coral justifies the outrageous price...

I see... I see... oh wait, I still don't get it.

[Josh Warner @ Apr 7th 2008 7:30PM]

It gets better. Coral is the buildup of calcified deposits by little animals like tiny sea anemones called polyps. After thousands if not millions of years, the polyps lay down a skeleton which becomes the myriad shapes we think of when we see the word 'coral.' (Re-worded from the wikipedia entry)

That's the freaking definition! There is nothing artificial about it at all. "Artificial" coral might as well be any calcium rich rock they picked up on the side of the road (gravel comes to mind). Anybody who actually pays for this thing didn't deserve to have enough money to do so in the first place.

[Lo_Opy! @ Apr 7th 2008 4:34PM]

wow, some products just amaze me with their stupidity...

[Esat Dedezade @ Apr 7th 2008 4:34PM]

What complex artistic tools did they use to create that masterpiece?

A white permanent marker duct taped to a pair of compasses.

[Esat Dedezade @ Apr 7th 2008 4:35PM]

Woops i should have added a '?' to the end of the last sentence. Otherwise people would think it was true....

[phanbouy @ Apr 7th 2008 5:00PM]

maybe they're inspired by the inspirational sport of curling?

[JLH @ Apr 7th 2008 4:35PM]

um... it isn't even real coral. On the site it says "The top is made with artificial Coral"...

[retro77 @ Apr 7th 2008 4:35PM]

nty

[looseONTHEgoose @ Apr 7th 2008 4:39PM]

Actually it is artificial coral...I feel sorry for the coked up rich kid who buys this fine product...

[TostitoBandito @ Apr 7th 2008 4:45PM]

Better fake coral than real coral, if you care about reefs being preserved for the future that is.

[Josh Warner @ Apr 7th 2008 7:33PM]

As I mentioned in an above post, there is no such thing as 'artificial' coral. Coral is, by definition, created by living organisms. Any 'artificial' coral doesn't deserve to be called coral.

You're right though, nobody should buy any product made with real coral (unless it's fossilized coral, like Petoskey stones).

[GPS @ Apr 7th 2008 10:04PM]

@TostitoBandito

Dont worry pal, reefs are preserved.
Nobody is going to buy this crap even if its real coral.

[TostitoBandito @ Apr 7th 2008 11:41PM]

@GPS

Trust me, reefs are not "preserved" nearly enough. I dive all over the world and many of them are in pretty poor condition (even the ones in marine parks or preservations). Overfishing, coral damage, pollution, and global warming all contribute. The ones in the best shape are simply the ones which are farthest from large numbers of people. Ask anybody that dove 20+ years ago and still dives today and they'll tell you that the conditions of most tropical reefs are not good compared to their condition in the recent past.

[StinkyPete @ Apr 7th 2008 4:43PM]

It says "very artistic"… That translates as "pay us enough it makes you look like you know something about art". Maybe my dictionary of cynicism needs a refreshing though.

[TostitoBandito @ Apr 7th 2008 4:45PM]

Better fake than real coral, if you care about coral reefs being around for the future that is.

[Jared @ Apr 7th 2008 4:44PM]

You had me at Coral!

[BigD145 @ Apr 7th 2008 4:44PM]

OMG they stole the Target target!

In other news, this is worthless tech. This just in; it's also overpriced.

[Ignatius @ Apr 7th 2008 5:01PM]

I'm sure Target is already filing trademark infringement papers...

[Dualboot @ Apr 7th 2008 10:45PM]

That's why it's overpriced!!!
They're including legal fees, so you can actually own it without while they're paying off the lawyers...

[LordJohnWhorfin @ Apr 7th 2008 4:45PM]

Lovely company name. Comes from the latin, I believe.

[phanbouy @ Apr 7th 2008 4:59PM]

Copulare =? to copulate?

[duffman @ Apr 7th 2008 5:02PM]

I like how their "very artistic design" was jacked straight out of a Target commercial.

[Clayj @ Apr 7th 2008 5:07PM]

This is just plain stupid.

[Chris @ Apr 7th 2008 5:20PM]

They only need to find 1000 stupid people to make $2,355,000 in retail sales.
Maybe if they were to follow the hill dog campaign around for a few weeks they
could find the people their looking for.....

[mike k @ Apr 7th 2008 5:27PM]

I commonly find that my iPod vibrates right out of my dock and falls onto the floor. With this anti-vibration pseudo-coral, perhaps my iPod will last longer (and of course sound better).

[sarcastic @ Apr 7th 2008 5:45PM]

You just don't understand. The shear mass of the coral creates a natural gravimetric shield that caustically couples/decouples the ipod from the surrounding space. The result is a much larger soundstage. The sound becomes much more open and free flowing with a nice improvement in resolution. Dynamics are better and overall naturalness is improved. This device (along with quality double-tri-cored-low-oxygen -silk-shielded interconnects)is simply the only way for one to connect their ipod to their 1/2 watt vintage tube amp.

[phanbouy @ Apr 7th 2008 6:09PM]

what hardcore audiophile would play back music designed for headphone/computer speaker resolutions on a super-fancy system anyway?

[phanbouy @ Apr 7th 2008 6:10PM]

whoops, just saw your username. I R deNse

[DeadPixel @ Apr 7th 2008 5:59PM]

can you say overkill

[gabe @ Apr 7th 2008 6:32PM]

can u say awesome?

[Noli @ Apr 7th 2008 6:38PM]

Wow - phono out, usb and... (gasp!) last-century-old standard definition S-Video!!!! For only $2000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

/someone's got to die for this/

[SilentMountain @ Apr 7th 2008 6:42PM]

Is it intentional their company name is one letter off from "copulate", meaning you have to be f*cking insane to buy this thing?

[Ryan Trevisol @ Apr 7th 2008 6:46PM]

Copulare. Really? Did no one in the startup team of that company possess the vocabulary to realize they were just one letter off from copulate? And while we're at it, this thing costs as much as 20 minutes with Spitzer's girl. I'm willing to bet 90% of people would go with the 20 minutes.

[Jason @ Apr 7th 2008 10:04PM]

I like how they put the device sitting next to/on other things that look nicer than it does. If they're trying to make an artistic statement, it's that it won't match just about anything else you own, unless you're color blind and still living in the 60s.

Also, since it's made out of coral it's waterproof, right? So I can use it in the tub? Sounds good to me!

[Reid @ Apr 7th 2008 10:36PM]

I am pretty sure this is part of an elaborate ruse to see what idiot is willing to pay the most for a pointless accessory.

As soon as an expensive device comes out that sells only 1 unit, and then the next most expensive device sells 0, the device that sold 1 wins the prize. And the person who bought it loses.

Actually, scratch that, if you overpay for a stupid piece of crap like this, you lose period, even if there are other people just as dumb as you.

[Ramses @ Apr 7th 2008 11:31PM]

Damn thing looks like a black and white Target AD!

[Shane @ Apr 8th 2008 12:06AM]

At first I thought this was a ceramic cooktop with a built in iPod dock!

Who was it that said a fool and his money are soon parted? Anyone who would buy this is a prime example...

[McFly @ Apr 8th 2008 12:22AM]

i just don't get it.. how do they intend to justify the price?? seriously though there's nothing to set it appart from other ipod decks...

[skulldriveshaft @ Apr 8th 2008 4:23AM]

Shane was right.

It's a hotplate with a dock.

Flamethrower: ON

[McFly @ Apr 10th 2008 12:19AM]

for that price i expect so much more, looking at the sockets it has a left and right channel and nothing else!! what about bass and tweeters to say the least. does it even come with speakers? sorround sound? i don't think so. to market something like that, at that price, is just criminal. go "copulare" yourself!!

[KilgoreTrout @ Jun 13th 2008 11:37AM]

Turns out that "artificial coral" is just plastic. They could have just called artificial diamond for all I care.

[KilgoreTrout @ Jun 13th 2008 11:41AM]

It must be joke. "Copulare" means to have sex in italian. Honest.