Robber holds up bank, doesn't bother to get off his cellphone

Make no mistake, we've seen some fairly boneheaded moves (even someone rocking this very same gaffe!) made by technologically-illiterate bank robbers, but the latest case involves a fellow who was quite the opposite of that. Yes, the 20 to 25 year male who decided to hold up an Alabama bank the day before his taxes were due actually did the deed without hanging up his cellphone. And there's surveillance footage to prove it. Quite honestly, we can't imagine what the conversation here would've been like, but at least he made the most of whatever minutes he had remaining as a free man, right?

[Via textually]

[ScooterDe @ Apr 17th 2008 6:20AM]

Dude, I'm in your bank stealing your money

[Mr.Tech @ Apr 17th 2008 4:37PM]

Can you hear me now? Good! I could of swear this was Verzion newest commercial =D

[Xew @ Apr 17th 2008 11:02PM]

Ocean's 11? nice

[N30 G30 @ Apr 17th 2008 6:23AM]

"we can't imagine what the conversation here would've been like, but at least he made the most of whatever minutes he had remaining as a free man"

lol. Great line!

[pagancollective @ Apr 17th 2008 6:30AM]

BORING.

I want to see someone rob a bank while texting on a numeric keyboard, at the same time buying ringtones and ringbacks, purchasing different cell phone games, downloading the newest Crazy Frog wallpaper, taking a picture of the horrified bank teller and messaging it to a friend ("OMG u wuldnt belieev her expression! L@@K!") while playing Guitar Hero Mobile.

...on an iPhone. Then, and only then, will I be amused.

[Sudo @ Apr 17th 2008 6:41AM]

ba dum ching

[Zeus.:God @ Apr 17th 2008 9:55AM]

BORING.

[sarcasm]

I'm sure you're a hit with all the ladies... You're a really funny guy.

[/sarcasm]

[i.c. weiner @ Apr 17th 2008 4:33PM]

well then sir you will never be amused. Guitar hero mobile is only for verizon and plus it would never work on the iphone

[mkeough23 @ Apr 17th 2008 6:51AM]

Why is this on engadget......oooohhhh is he on an iphone??????

[PDubNYC @ Apr 17th 2008 11:40AM]

more importantly, this is far from the first time this has happened.

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/11/12/national/main1041387.shtml

but god am i ever tired of someone always bringing up Apple, no matter what the story is about. It's not a goddamn newspaper, they can write about whatever they want

[Ellianth @ Apr 17th 2008 11:53AM]

And the rules of free speech dictates that he can complain about whatever he wants.

[mkeough23 @ Apr 17th 2008 4:38PM]

I'm not complaining I actually enjoy reading about new apple products every once in awhile........its just funny

[ummmm @ Apr 17th 2008 7:03AM]

HE WAS TALKING TO HIS LOOK OUT AND GETAWAY
OBVIOUS

[Smart People Play Tuba @ Apr 17th 2008 8:26AM]

Or he coulda been attempting to rob tha bank with a bloody telyphone, like thah bloke was talkin' about in "Pulp Fiction."

-- "What happened to the girl?"

$%#%, there probably was no girl. That's not tha $#@%ing point. It was that he robbed the bank . . not with a gun, but with a bloody #@$#ing phone!

[Gorillamonk @ Apr 17th 2008 10:05AM]

you know, that scene was so awesome in Pulp Fiction. reminds me of a few scenes from Snatch that relate from pointlessness.

[schmitty338 @ Apr 17th 2008 10:09AM]

"Who is goin' to mug two black guys, holding' pistols, and sittin' in a car that's worth less than your shirt!?"

[Kizorblade @ Apr 17th 2008 11:15AM]

Snatch is an awesome movie.

[Spawn Xe @ Apr 17th 2008 7:06AM]

I've seen this type of thing before on one of those robbery surveillance tv shows, he's more than likely on the phone to a look out/get away driver.

[clockwork @ Apr 17th 2008 7:20AM]

if that is the case, i think a little planning would of been in order,
like getting a hands free set for his cellphone...

...i guess he dint have the money for one!!!

[Paul @ Apr 17th 2008 10:46AM]

Yup - I work in the security department of a very large bank and i can say the majority of them are on cell phones when they are doing a robbery. I can also say that this location's camera set up needs help.

[feng @ Apr 17th 2008 7:17AM]

Isn't the idiot actually helping to provide one more clue for the police to get him?

[dazepro @ Apr 17th 2008 7:18AM]

Did you know that the average take from a bank robbery is only $2,000. Doesn't seem worth it when at least in California you get 25 years plus 5 years for every bullet; that's if you robbed the bank with a gun.

[NxP3 @ Apr 17th 2008 7:40AM]

I see you've done some research huh? Yeah....not worth it right? Have you thought of plan B?

[sinjinn @ Apr 17th 2008 8:00AM]

wow.. really.. really not worth it.

[swingin' dick hero @ Apr 17th 2008 8:59AM]

Thanks, that was actually more interesting than this article. Fun facts!

[DESTOS @ Apr 17th 2008 10:08AM]

Does that average include all the people that don't get any?

That would kind of throw the average way off.

[Paul @ Apr 17th 2008 10:47AM]

it does include people that don't get any but your average thief DOESNT get any or what he does get is hit by a dye pack in seconds.

Bank robberies dont work.

[hypereric @ Apr 17th 2008 7:20AM]

Goodness man, put some effort into it! Maybe the Pink Panther movies warped my criminal mind at a formative age, but doesn't the criminal sect have at least one or two geniuses that will entertain us at least once a year with a good heist?!?!? You know, slide under the frickin laser, do a backflip over the other one, hack the bank's vault with a handheld PDA, and do it w/o guns and people seeing you (guns are bad, they add like a mandatory 10 year sentence).

[sinjinn @ Apr 17th 2008 8:02AM]

those guys dont get caught on camera

[hypereric @ Apr 17th 2008 8:28AM]

Exactly. But their heists do get reported. And the last one I can think of was an art, and/or perhaps, a (or "an"?) euro heist in Europe about two years ago.

The dearth of IQ and finesse in our criminal sector is painting the entire
American underworld with a bad(-er) reputation. I blame the XBox 360 and the PS3 for the dumbing down of our potential criminal masterminds.

I mean: honestly, does anybody really think it's as simple as Perfect Dark Zero made it out to be?

[r3loaded @ Apr 17th 2008 9:38AM]

There was that £20 million cash heist in Tonbridge, UK some time ago...

[hypereric @ Apr 17th 2008 12:32PM]

r3loaded: yea, but didn't that involve guns and hostages and stuff? amateurs!

[tiuk @ Apr 17th 2008 3:08PM]

Wasn't it around Christmas that some stores like Best Buy were hit? The perps had cut a hole in the ceiling and cleaned the place out, or something like that. Sounded very movie-like.

[hypereric @ Apr 17th 2008 3:23PM]

tiuk: Thank you! Planning, ingenuity, no guns, no little old ladies getting scared. You have restored my faith in the American underworld.

[mattclarkie @ Apr 17th 2008 7:29AM]

The police should easily be able to track him as they can ask the phone company who was using the phone at the mast at that time.

But I doubt the police are that smart.

[Kyle @ Apr 17th 2008 7:38AM]

HEY!

There's two sides to every story. Is that an iPhone?

[Kyle @ Apr 17th 2008 7:39AM]

Can you hear me now?

[Shannon @ Apr 17th 2008 7:59AM]

I've probably seen too many movies. But maybe he was on the phone with some guy pointing a gun to a loved ones head and he was being forced to rob the bank for someone else so that person wouldn't be killed.

[sinjinn @ Apr 17th 2008 8:05AM]

and then what happened??

[swingin' dick hero @ Apr 17th 2008 9:02AM]

Well, obviously he put a cap in the bad guys face and had hot sex with a girl on a yacht.

[Paul @ Apr 17th 2008 10:48AM]

It happens - we see a couple of those a year nationwide - more often it will be an employee's family.

[Jeff Jones @ Apr 18th 2008 11:51AM]

More likely he was on the horn with his accomplice outside who was looking for cops.

[RapidKiller @ Apr 17th 2008 8:00AM]

if its not an iPhone, i bet its one of the first things he buys with the cash

[sinjinn @ Apr 17th 2008 8:07AM]

i dont think so.. unless someone happens to come by an iphone and wants to get rid of it to buy some crack for his starving heroin baby's hooker mom.

[Christopher Wilson @ Apr 17th 2008 8:41AM]

I thought you can't pay for iphones with cash?

[payne @ Apr 17th 2008 8:03AM]

I'm honestly jealous of his multitasking abilities. Robbing a bank while paying taxes on the phone? Good Lord!

He would have been the best at any profession if he just applied himself.

[jonyb @ Apr 17th 2008 8:32AM]

mmm.. honey.. wat exactly is it im supposed to rob again???

[Down @ Apr 17th 2008 8:39AM]

That cell phone seems larger than usual, that must be something else! Like a face warmer or something, cuz u know, you're cold when you rob banks.

[theMass @ Apr 17th 2008 8:45AM]

He was talking to Microsoft's automated product activation "ASSistant" explaining that his copy of Windows was legit... he just upgraded his CPU... he got disconnected 30 seconds later when he was being transfered to India... After that he called 911.

[randomgyan @ Apr 17th 2008 8:56AM]

OR OR
He is being blackmailed to rob the bank and the guy on the phone has his wife/girlfriend/daughter/son hostage and is giving him instructions over the phone..

Either that or I've been watching TOO much HBO!