Newman's Cool Man MP3 player: yes that's a safety pin, stud

In one fell swoop, Newman shows the industry how to get its ass back into plastic. The Cool Man MP3 player is anything but, man. Unless you're still wearing that acid-washed, Blondie pin collector from your 80's wardrobe. The DAP features an OLED display, MP3/WMA support, built-in mic and bleb poppin' safety pin. And that juicy orange? We have no fracking idea since the player is about as waterproof as a, as a... well, entry-level MP3 player.

[Cody @ Jun 5th 2008 4:12AM]

They are really breaking the bank with that safety pin, probably make the price super high.

[granun @ Jun 5th 2008 4:32AM]

pretty cool :)

[MARSHAK @ Jun 5th 2008 10:04AM]

isn't that just the happiest MP3 player you've ever seen?

[RC @ Jun 5th 2008 4:37AM]

Is this from the salad dressing guy?

[j_g_puff @ Jun 5th 2008 4:45AM]

It seems to me the only thing you've learned is that Caesar was a 'salad dressing dude'.

[Hafk @ Jun 5th 2008 7:22AM]

Most righteous, dude!

[Zuke @ Jun 5th 2008 4:38AM]

Before I read the title, I thought this was a story about the new micro-Roomba.

Wait a sec, wouldn't that totally rock to clean your desk?!?! For the geek that has everything... :)

[Jaque-o @ Jun 5th 2008 4:47AM]

Someone at their design department needs a serious ass-whoopin'.. That thing only has 2 cool things about it

1. OLED display
2. I'll never have to be seen with it

Lol, seriously, this is one of the worst designs out there.. and then there's the name.. Damn, asif they are trying to kill their own company

[Phred @ Jun 5th 2008 4:50AM]

I've always dreamed that the cheese wheel I pin to my shirt could play music in low quality!

[BrianB @ Jun 5th 2008 4:58AM]

You're supposed to put your logo on it. It's also tiny. Look again at the other image where it sits on a half orange. Must have lots of uses, if you asked me.

[giuliop @ Jun 5th 2008 5:09AM]

With the display facing that way, I can foresee a lot of neck stretching and jacket ripping.

However, once you've changed the song names to insults, you can go around and when someone asks, "What's that? Who's an idiot?", you answer "No, that's the song name: You Are An Idiot".

[gotrixzeth @ Jun 5th 2008 5:20AM]

looks like its smiling at me!!!

[K Nang @ Jun 5th 2008 5:32AM]

it definitely looks like cartman with a geordi la forge visor

[fourthletter @ Jun 5th 2008 5:52AM]

The sad thing is look around next time you're in a public place.
YES those people are weraing pink and grey stripey t-shirts with Blondie pins and leg warmers. Sadly for those of us that lived through the 80s they are back AGHHHH!

[bebop @ Jun 5th 2008 6:09AM]

I disagree. This is *definitely* in the so-bad-its-good cetogory. Safety pin, wierd happy-face-eske with shades design, find it in your grocer's freezer color scheme. I want one.

[Juice @ Jun 5th 2008 8:59AM]

This is a giveaway mp3 player(hopefully) not a consumer high grade MP3 player. So until you're ready to buy 5000 ipod shuffles and give them away think again. Although I do think the safety pin was a bad idea.

[fistpittingnork @ Jun 5th 2008 10:28AM]

Scrolling down through the page, I caught the picture and thought it was a new Roomba design.

[rutsy5 @ Jun 5th 2008 12:56PM]

That has to be one of the worst photoshop jobs I have ever seen in a real advertisement....

[kjb434 @ Jun 5th 2008 6:06PM]

Not everybody needs an iPod, Zune, or Creative type MP3 player.

Some people just need something to hold a about 50 songs for workouts and running.

Outside of working out, i never listen to music with headphones. So something as insignificant at this has it's place.

[fanthem @ Jun 5th 2008 7:42PM]

They should have added a bottle opener on that thing. First thing I thought of when I saw it.

[terenceyyk @ Jun 10th 2008 3:09AM]

The Chinese are going to love this.