No, seriously -- you have to digest this quote. According to Gesten Technologies President Jeffrey Gesten: "If you listen to loud music through earbuds, then you are risking long term hearing damage; if you listen while you are jogging or bicycle riding, then you are risking your hearing... and your life!" Hear that kids? If you use any product other than the ridiculous looking iCap, you're practically playing Russian Roulette with Dr. Death. Speaking of the cap at hand, said wearable packs a 1GB MP3 player, an FM tuner, a voice recorder (really?) and a microSD slot for carrying around even more Boyz II Men tracks on your dome. It also touts external speakers, which should totally freak out any other jogger you happen to pass by. Those with enough fundage to buy something purely for comedic purposes can hand over $119.95 and begin to chuckle right now.