Vertu Signature Dragon handset puts the 'ugh' in 'luxury'

It looks like Vertu isn't resting on its laurels -- a mere two years after snatching the "world's ugliest phone title" with its Signature Cobra, the company's back with the Signature Dragon. What can we say about this one? Not much, seeing as how the thing isn't even listed on the company's website. Even so, since the Cobra retailed for over a quarter of a million bucks we're guessing this new handset ain't gonna be cheap. Feel free to sneak a peek at the thing in the Vertu store in Las Vegas's Wynn Hotel when you hit the town for CES. As an aside, when researching this post we came across an erotic French novel titled Dragon de Vertu which is on sale for about $30. Even if you don't read French, we still think it'd be a better use of your hard earned cash -- and if you do read French, please underline the good parts before you pass it on to us.

Read: Vertu to display its luxury handset 'Vertu Signature Dragon'
Read: Dragon de Vertu by Francis Tigrone

[Jason @ Dec 24th 2008 4:29PM]

That'smafugly!!

[Samboini @ Dec 24th 2008 5:02PM]

Tacky phones should be made illegal; free country or not.

[Ridgecity @ Dec 25th 2008 5:24AM]

This is probably just tie.in merchandise prototype for "Kung Fu Panda". This is the actual released phone:

http://www.totobay.com/images/detailed_images/A6398_Bice.jpg

[Saad Rabia @ Dec 24th 2008 4:30PM]

My friend bought a Vertu. Now he shares an iPhone.

[shadow @ Dec 24th 2008 4:43PM]

why in the world would be buy a vurtu? most people dont even know vurtu makes phones,let along very, very expensive phones.

[Saad Rabia @ Dec 24th 2008 5:03PM]

shadow, I swear to god, I shit you not. He is loaded, so he bought it to see what is so special about it, and after just 3 weeks he calls me and asks me to find a buyer for that thing. The week after that, he decided to jump into the hype and buy an iPhone, and although he hates the iPhone for not having video recording and bluetooth file sending, he still doesn't regret, for even a second, the day he left the Vertu.

I had the chance to use it for a day, but my technology morals didn't allow me to.

[shadow @ Dec 24th 2008 5:13PM]

he should buy an android phone. htc is coming out with 2 more q1 2009 and many other great companys are making android phones.


or he could buy an n97.

[n_shakuras @ Dec 24th 2008 7:06PM]

I'm still confused as to how he's "sharing" an iPhone with himself.

[Saad Rabia @ Dec 25th 2008 2:57AM]

@ n_shakuras: Lol, I understand you confusion and here is my explanation: I just have this believe that when you are using any Apple product you are simply "sharing" the experience, not really using it all for you, especially when it is the iPhone; that device is locked and remotely controlled to a point where your experience is all under the well of Steve Jobs.

[iSmoke,therefore emit death by breathing @ Dec 25th 2008 9:54AM]

LMMFAO,i knew exactly what u meant when u said "sharing" but thnx for explaining,aptly put my cyber friend

[JohnTitor @ Dec 24th 2008 4:37PM]

they also put the 'ugh' in 'ugly'

[Jason @ Dec 24th 2008 4:43PM]

Le Ug cherie?

[Jonathan-DBOSS @ Dec 24th 2008 5:20PM]

Oui Oui.

[Arkenklo @ Dec 27th 2008 6:51PM]

Hey, there's no ugh in ugly!

[Tim @ Dec 24th 2008 4:42PM]

So ergonomic! -,-

Throw this on the "For Enemy" list.

[Alex @ Dec 24th 2008 4:55PM]

Or do you mean "egonomic" ? Other then showing people that you have money to burn why would you buy this or any of their other ugly phones.

[Tim @ Dec 24th 2008 5:00PM]

Why would I buy it? Maybe a Christmas present for "Will it Shred?". It might be pretty.

[Cybergypsy @ Dec 24th 2008 4:48PM]

Built for a Ninja!

[Smileypanda @ Dec 25th 2008 7:45PM]

Yeah, an ugly ninja.

[broli @ Dec 24th 2008 4:50PM]

It rather looks like it came out of a dragon's ass.

[nxp3 @ Dec 24th 2008 4:51PM]

Hey at least they overdone themselves. Now they got the world's ugliestest phone title. Not easy to outdo yourself every year.

[artisan555 @ Dec 24th 2008 5:00PM]

Hahn's cell phone from Enter the Dragon!

[Newone @ Dec 24th 2008 5:03PM]

Your missing the point of luxury phones. It doesn't matter if it's ugly as long as people can tell it's expensive. A simple formula:

Luxury = Expensive
Luxury ≠ Beatiful

Have a look at a luxury yacht:

http://www.wally.com/jumpCh.asp?idUser=0&idChannel=192&idLang=IT

Loving that look is a acquired taste

Most luxury items are just for shoving you have money, looks isn't a factor.

[KEROLiUKAS @ Dec 24th 2008 5:10PM]

Except that that yach looks amazing, unlike the phone..

[yopladas @ Dec 24th 2008 5:15PM]

That I saw that yacht in some magazine...

And I herd it's in the Mediterranean... and the pics from the inside cool sooo cool.

So ya.

[AutumnBringer @ Dec 24th 2008 5:32PM]

I always thought the point of luxury was so that the experience of using the product was ... luxurious, and functional.

Like a luxury car, it's *supposed* to have a bunch of features that make driving more pleasurable. And they typically try to make it look somewhat nice, make it a luxurious experience for your eyeballs too.

This phone however, it looks plain, it looks ugly and uncomfortable to use. Gemstones, they're cool if you're into that sort of thing, but really, scraping them on your face while on the phone can't be comfy. I suppose if you really care about the things you have looking expensive just for the sake of trying to impress people, you deserve to burn your cash on this, but there are at least a dozen phones that will offer a far more luxurious experience at a tiny fraction of the cost.

[UnixSystemsEngineer @ Dec 24th 2008 6:00PM]

You know what's funny, there's still bound to be some idiots who say we only think it's ugly because we can't afford one...

[kadajawi @ Dec 24th 2008 9:44PM]

How can you think that yacht is not looking cool? In a F-117 sort of way.

The Vertu on the other hand...

Ps: I've seen quite a few Vertu fakes, probably no one will be able to tell the difference anyway (it's not like the hardware is hard to imitate, unlike the iPhone).

[kevin @ Dec 24th 2008 5:04PM]

Lughxury?

[Jonathan-DBOSS @ Dec 24th 2008 5:23PM]

It's "Lughxuriè"! xD

[Deadpan @ Dec 24th 2008 5:13PM]

There's a point where you have to ask, are we being punk'd?
Really. Rich people have already proven that wealth kills sense of good taste.
I think Vertu and Co. are simply building things like this to fuck with us.
More power to them!

[Bayard @ Dec 24th 2008 5:15PM]

World Record Ugly.

[scabrous @ Dec 24th 2008 5:16PM]

Perfect. Dragons like shiny things!

[digitallysick @ Dec 24th 2008 5:33PM]

Looks like it came out of the bubble gum machine

[Jason @ Dec 24th 2008 5:40PM]

I call BS! You guys got that out of a crane machine for $17 in quarters!

[Mek @ Dec 24th 2008 5:41PM]

Eww...

[Uncontrol @ Dec 24th 2008 5:45PM]

it's so ugly it's awesome

[nikster @ Dec 25th 2008 12:10AM]

seconded ;)

this seems to be made for gangsta rappers and yakuza bosses.

[KRIS_C_123 @ Dec 24th 2008 5:46PM]

thats uglier than a baby panda

[CleverEndeavor @ Dec 24th 2008 6:15PM]

that's so ugly that it almost made me gag

[npChaos @ Dec 24th 2008 6:42PM]

You have terrible tastes...

I actually gagged!

[cwj @ Dec 24th 2008 6:47PM]

"I - I - I - I want the kniiiiiiife."

[cwj @ Dec 24th 2008 6:48PM]

"please..."

[ducky @ Dec 24th 2008 6:54PM]

Haha, that's an awesome title.

[General Disorder @ Dec 24th 2008 7:13PM]

You guys clearly have no clue what being rich is about. It's about telling the world you don't care.
Vertu does a great job feeding that need.

[Ignatius @ Dec 25th 2008 12:07AM]

Yeah, I guess so. Someone says your phone is ugly and you just ram it into their nose. Then buy yourself another ugly phone.

[JOCOMAN @ Dec 24th 2008 9:02PM]

Just when you think this phone can't get any more ridiculous....surprise surprise !!

[STINK @ Dec 24th 2008 10:14PM]

This will go perfect with your 80's Scarface outfit

[vertuguy @ Dec 25th 2008 1:31AM]

Hmmm where to start. First your dad didn't have anything to do with the diamonds for this as this is a boucheron phone and they do all the work with their partnership with vertu. Vertu doesn't make anything for other companies so no diamond ipod case sorry. This phone isn't new, it has been in vegas since march and is one of many boucheron/vertu phones. They range from 100k to 500k and normally sell to people from the middle east, russia, china, etc. They sell out every year. These phones are definitely not for everyone, but most vertu customers have an iphone or blackberry too, they don't need to choose one or the other lol. Anyway let the flaming begin!

[Bill @ Dec 25th 2008 3:26AM]

Vertu clearly designed this phone with the Chinese market in mind. While it might be very ugly to Westerners, a Chinese businessman/woman might find it beautiful. In Chinese culture the dragon is a symbol of power and success.

By the way, I'm a Westerner and I think it looks tacky as hell. C'est la vie!