Alienware M17x unboxed... by Mr. Bicep

We noted that Alienware's "All Powerful" M17x gaming laptop was a hefty beast when we got our hands on it last month, so who better to unbox this 11.5-pound monster than Bruce Pechman, also known as Mr. Bicep? Apparently Bruce scored one of the first models off the line after betting the Alienware reps at E3 that he could do 17 straight one-arm lifts of the demo machine over his head, and his maxed-out rig packs a quad-core Core 2 Extreme, dual GeForce 260M graphics cards and a slot-loading Blu-ray burner -- all of which arrived in this gigantic 32-pound box. Yeah, it's a little ridiculous -- but you know you want it.

[rob.m26 @ Jun 14th 2009 7:43PM]

he so waxes his chest

[NG @ Jun 14th 2009 8:02PM]

i dont think so man, steroid will do the job naturally lol

[rob.m26 @ Jun 14th 2009 8:04PM]

wanna stop insulting my mom?

[wickedpheonix @ Jun 14th 2009 10:35PM]

He's not insulting your mom, he's insulting your sister.

[allislost @ Jun 15th 2009 6:01AM]

Stop making fun of my wife.

[G. I. @ Jun 15th 2009 11:01AM]

He waxes his anus as well.

[CJ @ Jun 15th 2009 7:44PM]

Stop making fun of my anus.

[luke liu @ Jun 14th 2009 7:43PM]

may want to hire out Mr. Bicep to carry that around for you too.

[DR House @ Jun 14th 2009 11:05PM]

Will he play crysis with me if i hire him?

[monkfishbandana @ Jun 15th 2009 4:13AM]

No need, it's included in the price. That's why it costs so much.

[EI8HT @ Jun 15th 2009 11:15AM]

i'd have referred to him as mr. anabolic steroids, but to each his own

[Quantumphysics @ Jun 14th 2009 7:43PM]

i miss the good ole days when I had to wonder if a new PC played Crysis.

With quad Core and a Geforce, I know it will.

[Brad Green @ Jun 14th 2009 7:48PM]

Apparently, we need a new game...of course, you could just ask if itll run MS Flight Sim X on full settings.

[Kamokazi @ Jun 14th 2009 8:09PM]

Don't worry, Crysis 2 is coming out soon.

[oldmanhorton @ Jun 14th 2009 8:44PM]

you do know that NVIDIA still brand's its inegrated graphics as GeForce- like the GeForce 7100. now, if you had said "dual NVIDIA GeForce 280M GT in SLI," that would be different

[Josh Ladella @ Jun 14th 2009 8:50PM]

"But can it play Crysis?"

Good 'ole days, my foot.

[Templarian @ Jun 14th 2009 8:54PM]

Will it play "Rage", or "Project Offset". Easier to go with games that won't be out for a long time.

[Matt @ Jun 14th 2009 9:03PM]

But... can it play Pong?

[wickedpheonix @ Jun 14th 2009 10:36PM]

dude, can it raytrace your mom?

[Sly [PSN SniperChameleon] @ Jun 14th 2009 10:47PM]

but can it simultaneously emulate ps4 and xbox 720 games downloaded from the future while playing crysis?!

[Kenneth @ Jun 14th 2009 11:20PM]

nahhhh these are the crysis 2 specs

http://theabutton.com/?p=44

[Sam @ Jun 15th 2009 10:58AM]

^according these specs im good and ready

[PuBeLeSs @ Jun 14th 2009 7:59PM]

i wish i just had the money to waste

[jay jay @ Jun 14th 2009 8:00PM]

a 32 pound box? Christ how heavy is the laptop 18lbs? why buy a super heavy laptop theres no mobility and the battery life is so bad it's going to have to stay plug in you might as well save some money and just buy a gaming rig desktop.

[kevin @ Jun 14th 2009 8:08PM]

LAN parties or playing in the car/boat/rv? Kinda hard and unwise to lug around a full gaming rig. Pretty sweet 'laptop' though :)

[Kamokazi @ Jun 14th 2009 8:11PM]

You might want to read the summary again, lest you appear stupid.

Oh, well, too late for that.

It does kind of say IN THE FIRST SENTENCE that the laptop weighs 11.5 lbs.

[paul34 @ Jun 15th 2009 1:04AM]

Beats me. Go to any college campus with a computer science department. You'll find quite a few kids with gigantic, extremely heavy laptops just to play WoW in their classes.

[Frankfurter @ Jun 14th 2009 8:01PM]

This article is wrong in so many ways. Makes me glad I'm not a PC user.

[Prokanda @ Jun 14th 2009 8:03PM]

you don't use a personal computer? what is your apple then? a piece of magical, digital toast?

[Kamokazi @ Jun 14th 2009 8:15PM]

@Prok

He may just mean he's a console gamer. Don't jump on the Apple hate train unless you're sure it's the right one.

Although I can see where you would be confused. He did make the asinine assumption that everything that does not cater to his specific needs or tastes is a pile of crap that no one shoudl ever want, which is typical of Apple users.

[Johnathan @ Jun 14th 2009 8:17PM]

Looks like a hot dog to me

[Prokanda @ Jun 14th 2009 8:20PM]

@kamo:
maybe you should take your own advice. try clicking on someone's posts.. he comments about how much he loves his iphone and jokes on winmo in most of them... when he's not bashing hondas.

he's a VW driving, iphone toting, imac owning Apple product lover.

thanks. :)

[Prokanda @ Jun 14th 2009 8:22PM]

oh.. and just to make it clear, I have a macbook pro and an ipod.. soon I'll be replacing my blackberry and ipod with a 3Gs.. but my main rig and secondary laptops are win machines... so I think I can comment on his close-mindedness.

btw.. the alienware is an amazing beast.. even an apple fanboy should be able to appreciate a machine with that much raw power. this guy is just a tool.

[Nohone @ Jun 14th 2009 8:27PM]

@Kamokazi

Being that just about every post that Frankfurter has made (click on his user name and browse his history) has been "iPhone FTW", some slam against a product competing against an Apple product, or the usual Apple fanboy cry of "Hey, why are you hating on Apple" when he turns around and does the same thing in reverse, I think it is safe to assume that he was making a Apple fanboy statement.

[Kamokazi @ Jun 14th 2009 8:31PM]

Apparently the statement about presumptious Apple fanboys was not enough to convey the intended sarcasm of the first line. Sorry about that.

Oh, don't forget a lot of them drive Subaru's and BMW's too :-)

[trevor @ Jun 14th 2009 8:41PM]

hes just a wiener, what did you expect?

[G. I. @ Jun 15th 2009 11:04AM]

Makes every PC user happy that you're a Mactard.

[TexRob @ Jun 15th 2009 12:42PM]

Apple users don't drive BMWs, just successful people. Both of which I own, so, yeah, I'm a pretty big deal.

[seanzky @ Jun 14th 2009 8:08PM]

Alienware has the worst customer support.

[waiownsyou @ Jun 14th 2009 8:33PM]

What computer support? It's the same support as Dell, AKA India! Now I don't mind calling India toll-free and getting support if it saves the company a few dollars but COME ON! I can't understand what the heck they're trying to tell me half the time!

Besides, the first thing they do is say, "Thank you for calling Dell/Alienware tech support. My name is Michael. Can I have your name please?"

You know DAMN WELL his name is NOT Michael. The first sentence out of a tech support guy is a LIE. Now the entire relationship is RUINED!

[oldmanhorton @ Jun 14th 2009 8:46PM]

they used to. then big bad Dell came in and completely F'd things up.

[Agent .25i @ Jun 14th 2009 8:57PM]

Buy XPS. You get North American support. Also the complete care warranty they offer is awesome. How awesome you ask? I was pushed into a pool with it last year while in my bag. Within 16 hours, I had a tech at my door to retrieve whatever he could from the HDD, and a brand new (exact) replacement. I'd say the extra 300. bucks was well worth it.
You get what you pay for. Be thankful they offer any (free) support.

[Brian @ Jun 14th 2009 8:58PM]

@waiownsyou - I'd rather talk to abdul in india with a degree in computer science than seth in Alabama with 8 kids and a meth addiction. But that's just me. At least abdul will fix my problem, while seth will just hang up because he doesn't know the answer and needs to get me off the phone in under 12 minutes in order to keep his job.

The last time I dealt with Dell support, five years ago, they next dayed me a 72 pound monitor because mine died after three years. 5/5, in my book. The only call center I've ever contacted, with an american staff, that knew what they were doing was EVGA. I've never reached India and worked with someone who didn't know the solution to my problem. (Dell, Discover Card, Microsoft, Sprint, etc)

@The article: This is a kick ass laptop. I'm not sure if the difference in price with ASUS or MSI is worth it, but it's kick ass none the less.

[Gfxlonghorn @ Jun 15th 2009 12:20AM]

@Brian
You clearly do not know what Computer Science degree is, and none of Dell support staff has a Computer Science degree, although it wouldn't matter if they did. Your basing all of Dell's customer service off of an experience 5 years ago involving a dead monitor. There is nothing to do when you have a dead monitor, it is just dead and they replace it. And just to add insult to injury, Abdul isn't an Indian name and even call centers have drug testing.

You can't beat Dell for their prices, but their support isn't the best. I am Indian and I still get frustrated as hell at them. Not because I can't understand them, but they all have to read a dumbass script and can't figure out that I clearly know what I am talking about.

[Ameen @ Jun 15th 2009 6:45AM]

@Gfxlonghorn:

I have no idea about Dell Service. Never had the need to call them up. But get your facts right. Abdul *IS* an Indian Name, or just name the previous Indian President. He was A.P.J Abdul Kalam. And AFAIK, you ain't no Indian, you just think that you're Indian. Chances are you might be a latino who got confused upon looking at some Indians.

[eugene @ Jun 14th 2009 8:14PM]

I don't get why the Alienware rep thought that Mr Bicep couldn't do a simple overhead tricep extension of a 12lb object. I'm small and I can do 20lb at least 15 times

[Gad Get @ Jun 14th 2009 8:53PM]

I know, talk about thick! Almost as thick as that guy's arms....

[Joe @ Jun 14th 2009 8:15PM]

Seems like Mr. Bicep needs a little stronger hosting

[EB @ Jun 14th 2009 8:18PM]

What is the point of having an 11 pound laptop?
With that much weight to carry around, it's not really portable anymore is it?

[Ishcabible @ Jun 14th 2009 8:32PM]

Well for LAN parties and such, it's portable.