Apple patent application promises means to detect gadget abuse
By Donald Melanson 
posted Aug 6th 2009 4:06PM
posted Aug 6th 2009 4:06PM
Apple's already put liquid submersion sensors in some of its recent products, but a recent patent application seems to suggest that it has some considerably grander plans in mind to detect and prevent gadget abuse. Described as a "Consumer Abuse Detection System and Method," the new system would apparently make use of a whole range of sensors to various issues that might void the warranty of the device, like exposure to extreme cold or heat, drops, or submersion in liquid. What's more, unlike the current liquid sensors that simply change color when something bad happens, the new system would apparently store the damage digitally in memory which, presumably, wouldn't be as susceptible to damage as the device itself. The system would also apparently do its best to protect the devices by disabling them if it detects some imminent danger, although Apple doesn't make any bones about the fact that it's primarily designed to save money on returned products that have been abused by the user.
That does make sense, but at the same time it is scary. Every little thing is monitored in our lives and it's getting worse.
No more Penile penetration for my Apple gadgets :-(
"I sense you are looking up a word in the Dictionary."
Yeah... so?
"I can't let you do that, Dave..."
wow, Apple's sucking it up today. Next thing they're going to tell me is that I can't use Safari because I watch too much porn.
You watch too much porn.
i do watch too much porn
I agree.
"Consumer Abuse Detection System and Method" ... More like "Anti Warranty Fulfillment and Screw Customers System"
Depending on how stricly these sensors are used, this could be a good thing for both Apple and their consumers. Standard warranties cover manufacturing defects, not people who drop their iPods into swimming pools. The extreme cold and heat seems a little bit much, but that all depends on what the defined limits are regarding the extremes.
Remember when manufactures had something called a drop test, to make sure the product had a specific build quality to withstand accidents. I guess voiding your warranty is more important than helping a customer out.
Tyler is on the money. Like we needed to baby our electronics any more than is already required of us. I'd like to see videos of what they consider warranty voiding (ab)use.
Well then, I am gonna patent a device that detects the abuse of the gadget owner by the manufacturer? I might even make it an iPhone app.
This isn't TOO unreasonable as manufacturers have been doing this for years with tamper-resistant seals, stickers, and the like.
But the real danger is when the detection device malfunctions, gives up a false positive and screws the consumer out of their warranty.
Engadget please delete "?" in previous comment and replace with a "." - thank you.
@ Hey Apples:
I'm with you. As long as they're reasonable with how they implement it, I don't think this is that bad. We'll have to see how it actually pans out, if they ever even implement it at all. It's just a patent. They have hundreds, if not thousands, that they don't use.
@tyler: If you abuse your device, you've already voided your warranty. That's not anti warranty fulfillment or screwing the customer, that's actually honoring the warranty provisions, and the customer getting what they actually deserve, instead of being able to lie about their warranty support and getting a (figuratively and literally) unwarranted replacement.
Ah bull, of course it is anti warranty fulfillment. Next it will send the data back to base attached to ur serial number. You call them up and it will be "sorry sir, last Wednesday 6 June last year ur device suffered a high velocity impact, thus is not covered" and you are like "i was bungee jumping u dicks"
the water sensor in the dock connector was triggered on my 3G; seperately months later the ring/silent switch nub snapped off. I call em up. "yes sir that is a known fault with your batch, no sir if the water sensor is activated ur not covered"; I'm like "the splash of water on the other edge didn't rip the switch off and u tell me it's a known issue but I'm not covered"; "I know sir, but it's how it is".
As for temp, well maybe they best NOT sell their devices in locations which have annual high temps that exceed the documented spec. Like the top half of Australia, India, Mexico, southern USA for example
It's ok. Just another reason to not buy crApple.
The worst part is the extra cost this will add to the device. Charge the consumer more for a bunch of stupid sensors just so that Apple doesn't have to pay to fix a warranty repair. Rip the customers a-hole a little more everyday is apparently Apple's moto.
If I didn't know any better, I'd think that Apple is having such a problem with returns they're having to take drastic measures to keep them to a minimum.
another way for apple to eff you right up in the A. right UP in the A
I'm not worried in the slightest.
The Jailbreak communtiy will find a way to disable this and/or spoof the results to make it look like everything is fine.
It's only a matter of time.
that sucks for me :-/ ... damn you Apple
Yeah, I'd rather have an amplifier than a computer. After all, I can check my email and write stuff on the amp too, right?
What a surprise! Apple cares more about its bottom line than about its users? Someone call the NY Times for a front page article!
"Apple cares more about its bottom line than about its users?"
Just like most Crack dealers.
What I don't get is why they would PATENT this. Who cares? Will other manufacturers try to rip this off? And if they do, who gives a shit? This isn't a feature. Most customers would not like having this in their devices anyways. Oh well, Apple could whip out their schlong and market it as a gimmick and everyone would run to suck on it.
Granted, that probably won't be the case most of the time, but such a system can also serve to back up the user, proving that they didn't do anything extreme to cause the damage they're asking to have fixed.
How are they going to avoid false positives? Obviously the discolorations on the white 3GS's are in excess of what those materials can winthstand without discoloring, but they are being caused by internal temps due to battery heat in most cases, NOT being left in hot environments.
Seems like a lot of money spent to excuse a lack of owning up to many legitimate warranty issues.
Turns out the discoloring was caused by crappy cases – not heat.
Turns out the !st gen iPhones had a design flaw that would render the digitizer useless right out of the box.
"Seems like a lot of money spent to excuse a lack of owning up to many legitimate warranty issues."
That's all I see here too.
Uh Durr that's kinda what this is suppose to prevent. It states it would disable if it detects information that would likely damage your device, similar to how your PC can shut itself down when it detects high temps. Also I'm sure it gathers information differently when the device is on as opposed to when it's not. Leaving an off device in 0 or 120 degree temperatures as opposed to using it in those temps would register quite differently. Hopefully that was just a brain fart and you're usually not that incompetent otherwise I fear for the safety of those around you and society in general knowing you exist.
I think one of the problems with this is that if the info can be seen by end-user. Because then it'll all become hearsay, So yeah you should believe the guys with knowledge but then you have to think this is still a business decision to ensure the minimum warranty return rate.
I live in Aust where we got it kinda hot but not really cold. I can only imagine that people that live New Zealand,Canada or alot of the snowy places around the world would be fucked.
thats actually a pretty neat idea. Would definitely suck if other companies picked it up, but hey, neat idea!
"What's more, unlike the current liquid sensors that simply change color when something bad happens, the new system would apparently store the damage digitally in memory which, presumably, wouldn't be as susceptible to damage as the device itself."
if u have that kinda tech ... why not make the device itself less susceptible to damage?
sorta like make the plane out of the material used to make the black box [yea i know too heavy to fly]
Dangit, you said it before I had the chance. I specifically did a search on the comments page for "black box". Nicely played.
Agree totally! Invent new technology to blow the whistle on people with slippery fingers, or use 20 year old technology to make it even sligthly water resistent?!? When will people see the truth that Apple is evil. What did the snake give Eve to tempt her? An apple. Case closed.
AHAHAHAHAH!!!
A nice dialog box is going to come up and say
"Sorry you F'in Noob your warranty just expired, next time don't use me to make a call in winter Dumbass!"
WHO wants to see my cat Barnaby? :)
Cats are dumb. Get a dog.
If it can't drink out of the toilet without a stool it's not a dog.
Just sayin, you know, for those giant rat things people call Chihuahuas.
@Barry
Actually, I don't think a cat or a dog would drink out of a toilet if there was a stool in it.
I understand wanting to prevent 'fraudulent' returns. But monitors can fail and then honest people look like liars. These systems better be 99% reliable, and then fail that 1% of the time toward the consumer.
Sorry, but what I do with a device after I purchase it is my decision. If it's exposed to "extreme heat or cold" and it stops working, why is that my fault?
Sorry, but no, Apple.
Typically, electronics have upper and lower temperature limits noted in the instruction manual. So if you expose it to temperatures above or below those listed, you have abused the device, and are therefore, at fault.
That said, I regularly use cameras down to -50 F, which is well below the manufacturer suggested temps. I would hate to be rejected for a warranty claim because of that.
It's more so you don't have to get support for it than preventing from you using it any way you wish. So, if you drop your iPhone in a toilet and then take it in claiming it doesn't work and you don't know why, they will know why and not support it. If you want to take your iPod in a freezer where the hard drive platters won't spin (Classic iPod that is), more power to you, but it won't work anyway, so what's the point trying?
I'll make the inevitable "why don't they make the whole device out of the unbreakable stuff" comment.
Otherwise, what a dick move. Considering how Cupertino decides what is or is not acceptable for the App Store, I shudder to think what they will decide is acceptable use for their devices.
Why not use this technology to, I don't know, help the consumer instead of punishing them? Like the accelerometer in a laptop that detects when it's been dropped, so it can brace for the fall.
I hope Apple protects this patent with its blood-thirstiest of lawyers. That way it'll keep other manufacturers from boning the consumer with it.
HAHA you said "Boner"
@ iPoop :: Actually, he said boning. Quite a difference between the two.