OpenOfficeMouse isn't free, isn't pretty
By Donald Melanson 
posted November 6th 2009 2:33PM
posted November 6th 2009 2:33PM
Think it's only gamers that require mice with more buttons than a scientific calculator? Then you've probably not met a die hard OpenOffice user, who now finally have a mouse to call their own in the form of the OpenOfficeMouse. Developed by WarMouse in partnership with the OpenOffice.org community, this corded point-and-clicker packs no less than 18 programmable buttons (each with double-click functionality), along with support for up to 63 separate profiles, a clickable scroll wheel, an adjustable resolution from 400 to 1,600 CPI, and, get this, a built-in analog joystick that can itself be used to store up to sixteen different keys or macros. Still no firm word on availability, it seems, but you can expect to pay $74.99 for this one.
I haven't used OpenOffice extensively, so I don't have enough of a basis to judge this mouse.
For instance, it would be presumptuous of me to say that this is ugly. My hypothetical opinion that it looks waaaaayyyy to complicated would be completely ungrounded. And it wouldn't be my place to say that this seems overpriced and highly unnecessary.
This is surely a p*sstake. It's just too far beyond the realms of reason to be real. There are some imperfections in the wording of the press release that are also raising some red flags, while the unusual WHOIS data for the domain doesn't exactly scream "genuine" to me. The 'contact', 'store' and 'WarMouse' links - at the foot of each page - don't take you anywhere, and the whole tie-up with Intellivision is just really weird.
This reminds me a bit of The Onion's brilliant take on the iPod wheel, where they showed Apple replacing the traditional notebook mousepad and QWERTY keyboard with a single giant wheel (search theonion.com for this if you've not seen it already). In that instance, there was just enough credibility in the idea for the satire to work brilliantly - but ultimately, it was blindingly obvious that it was a stupidly impractical design that required such a level of compromise and such a steep learning curve that it could never possibly work. Satire at its best.
I honestly can't believe that even the open source community could believe that such a product with an equally steep learning curve, minimal practicality and an unattractive level of compromise ("it usually takes about two days to get accustomed to a new profile") that there couldn't possibly be a realistic market for it at that price point.
I'll probably be proved completely wrong in the days ahead - but it would be a genuine and shocking surprise if I discover that this is in fact a real product - but for now, there's just too much that's so *wrong* about this whole thing my mind is still leaning towards this being an elaborate hoax of some kind.
Do not want!
What? only one scrool wheel? c'mon don't be so shy... we live in a 3D world, we *need* al least 3 scrolling wheels!!
One that scrolls left to right...right? heheheh Just go all out and put "nipples" on the darn thing as well (IBM or Apple's last gen Mighty Mouse nipples, take your pick).
Ooh...I wonder what World of Warcraft gamers would have to say about this mouse. "yes!!! buttons for ... . LOL!
waah! html misread my brackets. I meant to say (insert action1) (insert action2) ... (insert action 18)
Seems to me that 4 scroll wheels would be ideal.
One scroll wheel that scrolls up, another that scrolls down, another that scrolls left, and another that scrolls right! It's brilliant!
The Bizzaro Magic Mouse
I would like to try World of Warcraft with that.
This was invented to annoy Steve Jobs.
Audio geeks would love this mouse!
Most of them are control freaks, by the way.
Wow... I can't believe this isn't a joke.
And how exactly do you work a word processor, spreadsheet, or presentation slides application with your hands on the keyboard as little as possible?
What does CPI mean? DPI means Dots Per Inch.
CPM, clicks per minute, would also make sense.
MEGA FAKE
It's 3D rendering.
Why?
Needs more cowbell!