Caption contest: Ellen DeGeneres and her ʞoou giveaway
By Richard Lai 
posted December 4th 2009 6:41PM
posted December 4th 2009 6:41PM
Ross: ".ɹıɐɥɔ ǝɥʇ uı ʞɔɐq puɐ dn ǝɯ d1ǝɥ ǝsɐǝ1d 'ʞoou sıɥʇ pɐǝɹ uɐɔ noʎ ɟı"
Chris: "Everyone gets a (deafening applause, people fainting)."
Joanna: "Oh cute, Ellen pulling a Michael Jackson. Where is the closest balcony?"
Vlad: "And with your purchase of the androgynous android, you get an added value ebook reader -- absolutely free!"
Don: "The good news? B&N has settled its dispute with Spring Design. The bad news? You have to hold it this way."
Richard Lawler: "Read this way, Twilight has an entirely different double meaning."
Paul: "I'm holding it upside down because it's a non-working dummy unit and it doesn't matter."
Nilay: "God I wish this was a car."
Richard Lai: "Look!! It's got the same smile as me! It's just like a magical mirror."
Ross Rubin: "Maybe one day, the Nook will be like me and finally come out."
those were all painfully unfunny
Vlad: "And with your purchase of the androgynous android, you get an added value ebook reader -- absolutely free!"
what the hell
@Uncontrol
I second this.
New caption for E.D.: "I seriously don't know what I'm holding, but they tell me it's a e-book reader. And that I'm holding it upside down. Is that right? Oh well, I'm giving it away anyway!!!"
Also... "Just checking to see if it had a e-penis. And... it does not."
@Uncontrol
My question for Vlad is: Do you know what androgynous means? What is this "androgynous" android you are referring to?? I clicked through the video and saw no android prior to the nook. Is he calling Ellen an android?? I DON'T GET IT!!!
@Uncontrol
To quote Ron White, "You can't fix stupid"
@Uncontrol
I don't know, I like Don's.
"nook" is "look" with a bending over 'l'
The sign of shame to these captions
Oh god. You think any of those women know what a nook or any of those things are. Or are they just there to scream. Who is this ellen?
Thanks **** we don't have any bs like this in the UK
@Rory Also, are Americans embarrassed at this video?
@Rory Haven't we got Trisha? Or is she too much of a Jerry Springer?
@Richard Lai Thats my point. Is this a Jeremy Kyle/Trisha show that just has a Christmas giveaway?
@Rory
She's just a comedian who happens to have her own talkshow.
Most people in the audience probably have no idea what a nook is. They're just screaming because they saw the $300 price tag.
@Rory Embarrassed?
.....Really?
@Rory Yeah, but half your country watches Coronation Street so....
Everyone was going ape s*** over the Nokia Netbook.
@Rory
why the hell would we be embarrassed?
We're not snotty. These are just people having fun while winning prizes
It's great. It's happy. It's fine
Ellen's show is just an innocent talk show where she interviews people and makes G rated jokes about hairstyles and other pop culture BS. Nothing wrong with it at all. If you don't like it (I don't, really) just change the channel. That's it
@Rory We have Jeremy Kyle. He is much, much worse.
@Rory yessss
Maybe she thought is was an eNook?
@Dale
WTF is wrong with all these crazy women?!!? WTF WTF SERIOUSLY!! I WOULD BLOW UP! AND FLY OUT THE WINDOW ON FIRE WHILE EMPLOIDING AT THE SAME TIME
What is this, the Home Shopping network?
@BigD145
Also known as Fat-Ass Central
damnit, why would they waste all that cool crap on a bunch of deGeneretards? Odds are half of those women don't know which to way to hold a nook either, much less use a damn mifi. Ugh.
@Colin B
degeneretards
Priceless!
@Colin B
i was in that audience... that crap wasnt wasted...
Who cares how is she holding it when it's a giveaway.
Slick Vic: Now, for all of you over the hill cougars in the audience who are not expecting any nookie this holiday season, at least you get a nook.
"Hope they don't notice that I am a Kindle Nazi..."
Never even heard of Ellen Degeneres. Does she have an Android Phone? I think I saw her in one of the Mytouch ads
@AndroidRokz How big is the cave you're living in?
@Yoda
Plato would say that AndroidRokz by his very nature could not know how big the cave is.
@AndroidRokz
You're better off never knowing Ellen.
@AndroidRokz Ellen is my favorite lesbian ever.
@AndroidRokz OH! HER! THAT LITTLE KID JUSTIN BIEBER WAS ON HER SHOW! I REMEMBER THAT!
The crowds reactions are funnier than the captions.
@Yoda
Yep. Ellen could give them a pile of horse crap and they would still scream about it.
@(Unverified) A pile of horse crap is funnier than the captions...
Wait a moment, all the guests gets one of each for free?!
@(Unverified) Yes, and a number of home viewers. http://ellen.warnerbros.com/12days/
you do realize u just spelt koon...
@scape
glad i wasnt the only one who noticed that..
engadget racism FAIL
@scape what's the problem with that? Be glad they didn't post a story on the reggin diputs coming out later this year.
"WHAT ARE WE SCREAMING ABOUT???"
"I HAVE NO IDEA!!!!"
"Loud noises!"
-Brick Tamland
Whats the point of all these ultra-expensive ebooks? Yup,it's a great present when you dont know what to buy-you can say :"it's an ebook.they are popular now..."
Please, David Blane, rotate those letters. For the ktulhu,and root, and a holy backup,amen
Wow. I have never seen so many people get so excited over things they have no idea how to use. This noobery is almost embarrassing to watch.
@OverDriven The Hausfrauen (correct grammar?) probably wonder how their paper books get into that thing. I'm sure many of them never heard of the nook, but, somehow, "eBook" is such a consumer buzzword that it whipped them up into that freakin' frenzy. They wouldn't have noticed the thing was upside-down in Ellen's hands.
Basically, I'm saying that they'll flip out over things they never would've invested time in researching because it's expensive and shiny. Now that Oprah isn't even having her favorite things show this year (or so I've seen), they're all working their way into the next few weeks of Ellen tapings.
They're going to go crazy over anything she has because it's not $15 homemade presents, like the shit Oprah pulled on a completely unsuspecting audience last year. I was bummed at first; I like the crazy audiences because it's my signal that Christmastime is here. Such warm feelings... But that was actually pretty funny last year, to hear metered applause and not the amazing sounds of orgy.
@OverDriven
I loved the MiFi part. She said what it was but nobody started screaming until she lifted the box off the top. How fake.