An analyst named Trip Chowdhry at Global Equities Research set off a firestorm of rumors last night after he claimed that Steve Ballmer would appear onstage with Steve Jobs at WWDC for exactly seven minutes to announce Visual Studio development for the iPhone -- and the maelstrom of crazytalk quickly expanded to include everything from a Bing partnership to Silverlight for the iPhone. Turns out all that chatter was just as insane and untrue as you'd expect, though: Microsoft's official Twitter account just clamped down on the speculation, saying that Ballmer isn't speaking at WWDC, or appearing on Dancing with the Stars. Sorry kids -- looks like we'll have to just hold out hope for next season.