lawnmower driver, achieving an average speed at the Bonneville Salt Flats of 96.529mph. That's on a riding mower that, from a distance at least, still looks like something you might find at Sears next to the tents and bikes. And yes, it will still cut grass, though we have doubts about its efficiency at that task. The team behind this beast had hoped to hit 104mph to correspond with a sponsoring octane booster of the same name, but didn't quite manage to crest the century mark. Still, 96 was more than enough to break the existing record of 87.833mph. Why engage in such frivolous behaviors? If you have to ask you'll never understand.