Moine-Garde recently came to our attention, and we were quite frankly amused by its offer of "fine virtual timepieces" -- if only because, in this context, "fine" and "virtual" would seem to cancel each other out. But like the best websites and catalogs catering to the wealthy, social climbers, or the just plain gullible, this company is not just selling Android apps, it's selling a lifestyle. Some of our favorite item descriptions:
- EX-01 Homme ($15) Entering the boardroom at 8:30 AM - everyone awaits a decision. Mentally going over the broader picture. Calmly sitting down at the end of the table. Placing the phone quietly on its black glass surface. Time: 8:31. Let the meeting begin.
- F-01 M'elle ($7) Strolling down Rue Saint-Florentin. New dress: Check. Artichokes: Check. Hometown Crémant: Check. All is ready. Thinking about his smile on the last date. Loving the scent of vanilla from the bakery across the road. 7:10 PM. Incoming text message: "Chéri - Can't wait to see you tonight."
- M-01 Jaune ($3) Finally got around to reading Fritz Neumeyer's essay on Mies Van Der Rohe. 3:05 PM, Sunday afternoon - Coldplay in the background. Sitting comfortably with a tall glass of Chablis. The patterns of rain on the terrace windows are simply amazing. Page 122.
- M-02 Verte (Coming soon!) 12:30 PM, Singapore. Lunch break at the School of Art & Design. On the rooftop enjoying a Katong Laksa. Green as far as the eye can see. Remembering a Murakami sentence. Watching a plane go by. How time flies. Have to return to the lecture. Guess that's ok.
At this point you're probably asking yourself if this is all a joke, or if these guys are serious -- and to be honest, we can't tell either. But we do know this: $15 is quite a lot to spend on a watch app, even if it does display hours, minutes, and
seconds. PR after the break.
Copenhagen, Denmark - December 20th, 2010.
LIFESTYLE BRAND, MOINE-GARDE LAUNCHES WORLD'S FIRST COLLECTION OF PREMIUM VIRTUAL TIMEPIECES
Conceived in the unlikely intersection of classic watch design & craftsmanship and the modern revolution in device technology, Moine-Garde brings forth the world's first collection of virtual timepieces engineered exclusively for smart phones.
The launch consists of five original timepieces from five collections of four watches each, designed for the Android platform with plans to expand to the iPhone, Symbian and Windows mobile platforms as well. The luxury of time no longer rests upon a wrist Moine-Garde was created to fill the need for enduring, hand-crafted luxury goods in the here today, gone tomorrow climate of today's modern digital world.
"We originally set out to create beautiful, aesthetic, original and working watches for the Android platform in a niche populated by cheap one-offs or luxury brand imitations that never really worked...With Moine-Garde, our aim was to achieve elegance in design and perfect performance, all hands and dials and gauges working and fully functional." - Mike Højgaard, Head of Design.
Indeed, this attention to detail adds depth to the Moine-Garde experience. Every analog movement from hour, minute and second hand to dual-/ tri- and quad time and to temperature gauge is digitally reborn and programmed to precision and exists seamlessly with missed call / SMS notification and an array of cloud based services - showing everything from wind direction, wind speed and humidity measures in certain models.
Learn more about Moine-Garde: http://www.moine-garde.com
Priced at $1.99-14.99 USD, each timepiece widget comes with its own tailored wallpaper and an application for managing its individual features.
Press Contact: email@example.com
Fine Virtual Timepieces