Besides the constant worry, the worst part of being a parent to small children is the noise -- oh the noise, noise, noise, noise. Dozens of cheap disposable toys squabble over the attention of your toddler by piercing the memory of your formerly carefree existence with sound. Enter the EaTheremin, with its goal of making blanched kale a fun to eat game for even the most finicky of kids. Here's how it works: touching the EaTheremin fork to the moist mastication factory of a human completes the electrical circuit to emit "music." The sound varies based upon the quality of the connection (the wetter the better) and resistance of the food. For example, foodstuffs with a different outer and inner consistency will create richer and more complicated sounds as you bite into them, whereas chicken skins will create a vibrato effect as the dermis stretches against your carnivorous ways. Boy, that does sound fun! See a rather overzealous demonstration on video after the break.